Here is a little test that will help you decide.

Question: How do you tell the difference between
Democrats, Republicans And Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock .40 cal, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come to a consensus.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Republican's Answer:

BANG!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading).

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or regular Hollow Points?"

And tell us what you would do.

oops never mind. Pat Robertson and the Atlanta Bomber already told us.

response to his daughter.

Southern Republican: "Now come sit right here baby and give daddy his sugar."

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

Question: How do you tell the difference between
Democrats, Republicans And Southern Republicans?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

Like most Americans, you are a middle class worker for a large company.  The company president/CEO, who is getting paid $250,000 annually, decides the company needs to increase it's profit margins and reduce costs.  The CEO then declares massive layoffs, and a mandatory 25 percent salary reduction and elimination of retirement benefits for all remaining workers.

With these cost-cutting measures, the CEO then receives bonuses and salary increases in excess of $100,000.

What do you do if you were one of those laid off or reduced workers?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Democrat's Answer:
This is a total atrocity.  We will immediately fight back through all legal venues, bring more power through unions, and restore the salaries and dignity of the middle class.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:
This is capitalism at it's finest.  The rich and powerful earned their spot, so let's not disrupt true capitalism.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Southern Republican's Answer:
Duh, I don't care, as long as they take my guns away.  BANG!
One year later, he's dead broke, has no life, and seriously contemplating suicide.  Points gun to head.  BANG!

Me?  I think the liberal has the best chance of downing the guy.  The conservative chicken hawk would wound himself fumbling for the gun, and the southern conservative would shoot six innocent bystanders including his daughter before the terrorist closed on him.  In fact, southern conservatives might just do that even if there were no terrorists on the scene.

Maybe you'd be better off trusting the liberal.

Sorry, couldn't resist.  

So, in your opinion I don't have the right or the ability to protect myself and by extension you should take the means to protect myself away from me?

Maybe I'd be better off trusting myself.

Sorry, couldn't resist.

Sorry I didn't see that he said that, oh and I couldn't resist !

No self-respecting southerner should be caught dead with one of those plasticised piece of shit Glocks.  

Springfield Armory 1911-A1 Micro Compact, sweeeet.

Marine's answer:  Take the knife away from the pathetic bastard, and save the ammo.  Ya never know when you might need it.

have the right or ability to protect yourself, but I think his point was that you were more likely to blow your own fool head off trying to protect yourself.

And, resistance is futile.

That was my point exectly. By inferring that I would be more likely to "blow my own fool head off" he is insinuating that I don't have the ability or the competence to protect myself.

Following that line of reasoning it would be logical to assume(from a leftie's point of view) that the government should procect me from myself, the same way they do with seat belt laws, drug laws, helmet laws, etc. by taking my guns away from me before I hurt myself.

Yes, Government is the answer to everything. I can't possibly be a responsible adult. I need the church to tell me what is moral, I need the Government to tell me what is in my own best interest. No offense. but to all of you who thing they know what's good for me better than myself, Please go Fuck yourselves!!! BTW that goes for the bible thumping right as well as the whining, sniveling left.

And you're right, resistance probably is futile, but those people can go fuck themselves anyhow.  

aimed at liberals using tired cliches. The liberal side responded in kind. This is not serious. Secondly, last I looked it was the right that was trying to tell everyone what to do, i.e. how to die, fuck, have babies, watch TV, watch movies, etc. And worse, if the current administration has its way then the church WILL be the government.
So relax, have a laugh, clean your gun and try not to accidently blow your fool head off.