Okay, I am switching forms of literary criticism from style to substance.
Before, I had thought that you were a Dem mocking GOP, which was clearly the thrust of prior efforts. This is kind of the opposite.
You have two clearly bad events that you don't refute (voter fraud and pouching eagles). I am not sure of your views regarding hip-hop, but for continuity, I would assume blaring hip-hop is also a negative, as the three should go together in quality. (I admit it may be my negative views on hip-hop, and if I am distorting, I appologize.)
(Look at the original and see the continuity - sun shining, band playing, hearts light, men laughing. all good. Then the kicker)
But, your lead in is "troubled land" with three examples of bad things happening, and they you swicth to the punch of Dems laughing. I know they are happy about the election, but in literary terms, if you are having them laughing you should recite the good stuff.
You make it sound like, "Oh, we don't care if it was fraud, we don't care if eagles are dying, we don't care if the U.S. is in trouble, ha, ha, ha, ha, we won." That is not a Good Guy Patriot message.
(The poem that screams to mind is the Melville one for Lincoln that ends with, "Beware the people weeping when they bare the iron hand." (I don't remember the name - been decads, but it is all the sadness of Lincoln's death and then it hits with the punch line - a line so strong I remember it years later.) "Bad, bad, bad, sad, sad, BEWARE they get even"
Finally, the attack on Palin isn't logical. There was never anything about her buying votes, so her failure to do so is a image that doesn't resonate.
Oh somewhere in this troubled land, ACORN fraudsters are registering illegals,
Hip-Hop is blaring somewhere, and somewhere poachers are trapping eagles.
And somewhere Dems are laughing, and somewhere welfare fraudsters gloat,
But there is no joy in GOPland, Governor Palin couldn't buy a vote.
Apologies to Ernest L Thayer
Don't give up your day job.
Through the operation of ill-chance, and through absolutely no fault of our own, we have become aware of your "output," such as it is.Please be advised that you are in absolutely no danger of ever being considered for the award of a Pulitzer Prize.I daresay that Donner Party Animal's chances in regard to a Pulitzer are somewhat better than your own. Infinitesmal as opposed to non-existent, respectively.
Okay, I am switching forms of literary criticism from style to substance.
Before, I had thought that you were a Dem mocking GOP, which was clearly the thrust of prior efforts. This is kind of the opposite.
You have two clearly bad events that you don't refute (voter fraud and pouching eagles). I am not sure of your views regarding hip-hop, but for continuity, I would assume blaring hip-hop is also a negative, as the three should go together in quality. (I admit it may be my negative views on hip-hop, and if I am distorting, I appologize.)
(Look at the original and see the continuity - sun shining, band playing, hearts light, men laughing. all good. Then the kicker)
But, your lead in is "troubled land" with three examples of bad things happening, and they you swicth to the punch of Dems laughing. I know they are happy about the election, but in literary terms, if you are having them laughing you should recite the good stuff.
You make it sound like, "Oh, we don't care if it was fraud, we don't care if eagles are dying, we don't care if the U.S. is in trouble, ha, ha, ha, ha, we won." That is not a Good Guy Patriot message.
(The poem that screams to mind is the Melville one for Lincoln that ends with, "Beware the people weeping when they bare the iron hand." (I don't remember the name - been decads, but it is all the sadness of Lincoln's death and then it hits with the punch line - a line so strong I remember it years later.) "Bad, bad, bad, sad, sad, BEWARE they get even"
Finally, the attack on Palin isn't logical. There was never anything about her buying votes, so her failure to do so is a image that doesn't resonate.
the presence of your critical eye in this forum is priceless, as you assist Donner in his struggles to become the Poet Laureate of TER Religion and Politics.
I suspect he is grateful for the input.
But, i do think you took can't buy a vote literally, and I get the sense it was meant to be understood figuratively, as in "...this guy couldn't get arrested if he tried" or perhaps "...this guy couldn't get laid at an orgy..." simply to indicate futility and fecklessness and ineptitude and wasted effort.
I guess I can see your interpretation of "buying" votes, and can accept it with some reservations because of the usual context. Okay. I withdraw that. But I stick by my other suggestions.
You have to admit that he is improving.
"godawful" an improvement from "the worst ever" I guess you could say he is improving.
It's kind of like saying EZdude is an improvement from Xfean. He is, but it's not much of a compliment.
that your immense contributions to this forum, quantitaltively speaking, is not setting this or any other worlds on fire.
Bad as Donner is, and bad doesn't begin to start to describe it, he gives it a shot.You just continue to waste bandwidth.
We don't know what you contribute because you're too chicken to make your criticisms using your "real" fake name.
Talk about a waste of bandwidth. I hate fucking cowards. BTW WTF is "repearting"?
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