Bringing your C game is just taking things to far

I've realized that there comes a point when you just don't know what to write in an ad. Clearly I need to hire a professional writer. Rather than copying and pasting what I normally write in an ad I figured I would just wing it and give you exactly what you want to know (though, unfortunately, I'm not a mind reader so there may be things that I don't mention in this ad that you DO want to know...in that case you might want to take a look at my awesome site).

I am currently offering three specials (one during the month of August 2015 only and two that are ongoing). Please visit my site to find out more about the specials (information is located on the middle of the "Reservations" page on the right).        
   
Stats:
27 years young
5'6" = 66 in = 1676.4 mm = 0.000905184 nautical miles
Mid back length brunette hair
Sparkling, captivating, devouring, lashious aka luscious lashes, (insert other ridiculous word here) blue-green eyes
All natural 38C-31-42 hourglass figure (I've got cushion for the pushin')
                                                   
Payment Options - Cash and debit/credit cards (cat photos accepted as well...kidding, kidding)      
Available - Everyday 10am to midnight (unless noted in the calendar on my site)              
Email - [email protected]

Here is a photo of what I do during my day...be lazy and take baths.

-- Modified on 8/10/2015 7:11:06 PM