This has been put into a format that guys can under stand: A golf game, which lord knows we like to play games. If any of the ladies think I missed something on my list please feel free to let me know, I sure you will anyway.

Object: Unlike outdoor golf the object is to get the club in the hole and to keep the balls out of the hole. Exceptions and Violations will be settled by the Course Owner.

Note: You may take as many strokes as necessary until Coarse Owner is satisfied that play is complete or until your time is up. This is a timed course, any additional time will be at the discretion of the Course Owner. Additional course fees will may be required.


1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment, 1 club and 2 balls. Any equipment not considered standard will need to be approved by Course Owner before play begins.
2. Course fees must be paid prior to begin of play. Note some Courses do not require this but to be sure check the course web site (if one is available). Bargaining for a cheaper Course fee is classless. You don’t do it with your doctor don’t do it here, we’re not talking about playing on a public Course here.  You might also want to review the rule book while at the Course web site, if one is available. Each Course is different and has their own set of rules.
3. Golf is a gentleman’s game and so is this conduct yourself as gentleman at all times (unless otherwise requested) while at or for that matter on or in the Course. Failure could lead to termination of play and future Course privileges. Other Courses will also be notified and your ability to play the higher the end Courses will be greatly reduced. You will always have access to the public Courses of course.
4. Dress Code, there is no particular requirement, although dressing smartly doesn’t hurt. Just make sure what ever you wear is clean.
5. Grooming, a shower and especially a close shave is recommended, if you fail to under stand the concept here take some 80 grit sand paper to your face, then to the inside of your thighs, rub hard both times and see how much you like it. If the Course Owner doesn’t smoke maybe you shouldn’t either, nonsmokers don’t like the taste or the smell of smoke, believe me. Onions and other spicy food you should already know better, but I have seen it in a course rule book not to eat said food so some idiot must have done just that.
6. Player should assure themselves that their match has been properly scheduled, particularly when a new Course is being played for the first time. Don’t be early, the Course might still be in use and the current player or Course might not want a three some. Don’t be late your play time might be cut short.
7. Players are required to wear the proper rain gear when playing south of the equator. This is not an option.
8. For the most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft. Course Owners are permitted to check the shaft‘s stiffness before play begins.  Course Owners do have the tools on site to fix any stiffness problems. If the shaft is broken than you need to see a specialist.
9. It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon arrival at the course. The experienced player will normally take time to admire the entire Course, with special attention to the bunkers. It never hurts to complement the Course Owner on how beautiful the Course looks, there is a lot to keeping them that way.
10. Players are advised to obtain the Course Owner’s permission before attempting to play the Back 9. Additional course fees will probably be required.
11. Slow play is encouraged; however, Players should be prepared to proceed at a much quicker pace, at least temporarily at Course Owners request.
12. It’s considered outstanding performance, time permitting, to play the same hole several times in one match. In fact it’s highly recommended, with Course Owner approval of course.
13. If a player is considered a Pro at a particular Course it highly recommended not to mention other Courses you’re playing, the Course Owner where you’re considered the Pro might not understand. You might find your Club house privileges revoked, althrough the dog house still will be available. Also short cuts on the computer desk top and book marking your favorite Courses in a folder listed as say “Courses I’m fooling a round with" also not a good idea. Putting phone numbers on your speed dial another really bad idea. Think of it like camping, Take only memories. Leave no trace.

Note: Some Course Owners have been known to have the capabilities and management skills to handle two or more Players on the field at one time. Call the Course Owner ahead to request policy on multiple Players if you’re looking to play in a group. Likewise if you want to play two Courses at the same time call ahead.

Happy Shooting! Keep your putts firm and your strokes smooth and rhythmatic, unless otherwise called for such as the quick and hard stroke.