Question for any ladies that are attached:  What are the coping mechanisms used by your significant others?

 Found out after getting married that my lady was an escort.  Heart raced, shortness of breath, etc..(Yup, I believe in love and honesty so I didn't look for clues, OK?) Became a TER member to get an insight and maybe not be consumed by my fears, thoughts, or questions. I thought this would go away but, after several years, nothing has changed in my reaction to her meeting clients.  NO, I am not involved with any of the revenues generated (though she may buy dinner sometimes)  I tell her I love her unconditionally and I certainly try to live up to that statement.  I can't (or won't) confide with anyone lest it demeans her in any way.  So, in trying to do no harm, catch my breath, slow down my heart, and get rid of this ache, how can this issue be addressed intelligently?  Sex is not a sacred issue and I think I believe  that a person can share their bodies with those of their choosing.  But I do hold the mind to be the magic that is reserved for love.  But I also believe the mind has to be shared for growth to happen and when you care about someone, you want the best for them, even if it's not me or from me.  Basket case, ain't I?