When women drink too much...

This is funny. Not saying it's happened to amy ladies here....hehehe

1. YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE YOUR PURSE IS.
2. YOU BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH YOUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING YOUR BUTT   WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.  
3. YOU'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT YOU WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S ASS AND HONESTLY BELIEVE YOU COULD DO IT TOO.
4. IN YOUR LAST TRIP TO PEE, YOU REALIZE THAT YOU NOW LOOK MORE LIKE A
HOMELESS HOOKER THAN THE GODDESS YOU WERE JUST FOUR HOURS AGO.   
5. YOU DROP YOUR 3:00 A.M. SUBMARINE SANDWICH ON THE FLOOR (WHICH YOU'RE EATING EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE NOT THE LEAST BIT HUNGRY), PICK IT UP AND CARRY ON EATING IT
6.YOU START CRYING AND TELLING EVERYONE YOU SEE THAT YOU LOVE THEM SOOOOO
MUCH.
7. YOU GET EXTREMELY EXCITED AND JUMP UP AND DOWN EVERY TIME A NEW SONG
PLAYS BECAUSE "OH MY GOD! I LOVE THIS SONG!"   
8. YOU'VE FOUND A DEEPER/SPIRITUAL SIDE TO THE GEEK SITTING NEXT TO YOU   
9. THE MAN YOU'RE FLIRTING WITH USED TO BE YOUR 5TH GRADE TEACHER.   
10. THE URGE TO TAKE OFF ARTICLES OF CLOTHING, STAND ON A TABLE AND SING OR DANCE BECOMES STRANGELY OVERWHELMING TO YOU.   
11. YOUR EYES JUST DON'T SEEM TO WANT TO STAY OPEN ON THEIR OWN SO YOU KEEP   THEM HALF CLOSED AND THINK IT LOOKS EXOTICALLY SEXY.   
12. YOU'VE SUDDENLY TAKEN UP SMOKING AND BECOME REALLY GOOD AT IT.   
13. YOU YELL AT THE BARTENDER, WHO YOU BELIEVE CHEATED US BY GIVING US JUST LEMONADE, BUT THAT'S JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN NO LONGER TASTE THE GIN.   
14. YOU THINK YOU ARE IN BED, BUT YOUR PILLOW FEELS STRANGELY LIKE THE KITCHEN FLOOR (er, or, the mop?)
15. YOU START EVERY CONVERSATION WITH A BOOMING, "DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG
WAYBUT..."
16. YOU FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN YOU SIT ON IT.
17. YOUR HUGS BEGIN TO RESEMBLE WRESTLING TAKE-DOWN MOVES.   
18. YOU ARE TIRED SO YOU JUST SIT ON THE FLOOR (WHEREVER YOU HAPPEN TO BE
STANDING) AND TAKE A QUICK NAP.
19. YOU BEGIN LEAVING THE BUTTONS OPEN ON YOUR BUTTON FLY PANTS TO CUT DOWN
ON THE TIME YOU'RE IN THE BATHROOM AWAY FROM YOUR DRINK.   
20. YOU TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF BECAUSE YOU BELIEVE IT'S THEIR FAULT THAT YOU'RE HAVING PROBLEMS WALKING STRAIGHT.

SADLY, MANY OF THESE
ARE TRUE.
LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE OF IT...KIND OF LIKE PLAYDOUGH!

Vampy

-- Modified on 9/8/2005 10:58:11 AM

-- Modified on 9/8/2005 11:02:02 AM