In a thread earlier this week, a hobbyist asked for opinion about the best BBBJ in town, and the discussion evolved into a debate about whether or not it is helpful when all/most of the responses come from providers themselves.

Your Pole question for the day:
Is it helpful to hobbyists seeking opinions from other hobbyists, when providers use that thread for self-promotion?

We all know why it happens (providers are limited to starting one "advertisement" thread per week).  Some threads, of course, invite responses from anybody.  This poll is one example; another would be a thread that asks "What Provider Has Heels That Make Her Over Six Feet Tall?"...you get the idea.

I can't think of any threads that hobbyists should stay off of, but I could be wrong about that.  Clearly, however, some threads are simply seeking opinions from fellow hobbyists.  Do you think providers should be posting about those inquiries?

On a side note, this question also raises the issue of whether or not this board should be used only for exchanging information that is helpful to hobbyists in their quests.  Feel free to jump on that one, too.

...merits a serious response, and points out how this Board  has changed from a relatively useful Hobbyist information source to another advertising vehicle for providers.  While there still is some relevant Hobbyist discussion (thank you, Chilopsis and Masters/Johnson, among others), it appears to me (flame on, Misty!) that several providers jump on many posts just to have their name ("Pick Me! Pick Me!") on the Board at any and all times.
I think it would behoove our Moderator, Mr. Dingus, to be a little more scutinizing of the shameless self-promoting posts, but I'm just a Hobbyist, should my opinion count?
Also, since I have never used an alias, I'd like to see the use of aliases stopped, also.  A pet peeve of mine is some jerk who posts behind a phony handle because she (or he) doesn't want the readers to know whose opinion we are reading.

...thoughtful and provocative polls.
I suspect your question is rhetorical, and you know the answer all too well: When you ask the hobbyists questions, you're seeking their opinions, not those of providers and vice-versa. Perhaps you could begin future posts with a beginning legend such as: "This is a question for hobbyists only". Or when applicable, "...for providers only." I feel that's better than putting the burden on Dingus.
Indeed, maybe all of us might consider doing that, so, for example, if a provider only wants to hear from colleagues, she can post a similar beginning legend. Ditto hobbyists.

I couldn't agree with you more about this subject!  I've been reading this board for quite a long time and have been disappointed in the direction it has gone.  It is bad enough when you see the same providers jumping on every post just to get noticed, but when it turns into a cat fight that is just too much.

Aliases?  I've never used one and never will. If you have something to say, man up and say it.  Don't hide.

Whether that is from a hobbyest or a provider.  If I am seeking info I want to hear from all who may help me.

Isn't there a "Provider only" board? (never mind - stupid question, because I see a link to the left that says so). I do agree with the idea of putting "Hobbyists only" in the heading. That may help a little.

Interesting question.

Going from your side note and working back up...

I suggest that a minimum threshold for a thread or response is to be relevent to the hobby (typical) or TER centric discussions (such as this thread). Here is where Dingus (IMO) should step in and delete clearly irrelevent posts. Sorry Dingus

Providers that over post run a serious risk of damaging their "name". The ladies I consider in the top tier rarely post. When I do see them post... I enjoy reading their comments for I knwo them to be intelligent people and on-topic when they post. I personally (don't know and don't care if others share this opinion) believe that a providers "name" is one of their, if not the most important, trademarks. A provider's reputation for delivering a quality experience is tied to her name. A guy can say: "Have you seen xyz" and only hearing that name may trigger memories of an outstanding experience. Damaging that name by over-posting or making extreme stretches to post a relevent response damage their name, and IMO reputation.

The providers have a forum for discussing provider only topics. I'm not sure what the threshold is to be admitted to that board (and am too lazy to go read the criteria), but I'm pretty sure it is much lower than the threshold for being admitted to the hobbiest board. So, "provider only" topics should be very rare on the discussion boards.

Masters and Johnson (what a figgen great TER handle, btw) suggested annotating posts with restrictions on the expected responders. Developing that protocol would be a good idea, but can it only be learned by newbies or infrequent board readers (not necessarily posters) by paying attention. Although, gentle reminding of an established protocol may elicit flaming responses:

"I have a right to post!"

"Who are you to tell me how to post!"

"I only posted my opinion!"


Just my thoughts, FWTW.

Without stepping on any footsies here, there is such thing as a 'Hobbyist' board as well here on TER. So there is a Provider board and there is a 'Hobbyist' board, so according to some gentlemen this board is going to 'hell' because so many providers post here all kinds of 'drivel'. Well, this discussion board really is for everyone, why else is there a Hobbyist- and a Provider board separately? So if someone really didn't want any interference of a provider then maybe their questions and requests should be made on the guys board.

I didn't mean to stir up some trouble, I was just curious about this dilemma that is going on and how to solve it.

AND sorry for responding to a 'Guys' question.

Puss och Kram,
Swedish Anna

-- Modified on 9/13/2007 3:38:06 PM

Give em hell swedish babe.  If they cannot take it straight then they should go to the "guys" board in order to avoid exactly what they are questioning by this thread.

i am a hobbyist as well as a provider. alot of providers retain services from other providers for various reasons.  

so if you only want to hear from men, perhaps you should say that this question is for the men only.

i still wont keep ladies from responding which is a good thing because if the ladies hadnt responded to those posts, there wouldve been a significant lack of responses altogether..

telling the women to stfu isnt going to make your board more useful.  contrary to your posts, i find misty's posts to be well thought out and always  for the benefit of the community.  certainly i've never seen her be so shameless as to throw a  temper tantrum and tell people to shut up whenever they have a different opinion than her.

how in the heck does any guy know what heels i have in my closet.. i didnt see that thread but i would think that question would be obviously directed to the women.
i dont have any heels that would make me over 6 foot regardless of what any guy thinks.

the only people that need to tell other people to shut up are the people that fear the truth might accidently come out.  the rest of us just ignore people we dont want to hear from.

How pissy can you get. Its a two way street.
You should be on a home owners association board where you can drive everyone crazy.

You haven't stepped on my toes.

I think you missed my reference to the hobbiest board. My point of mentioning that in my orignal post was simply that for "ladies only" sorts of conversations, there is a forum that I believe is more easily joined (3 TER reviews). On the other hand, not all guys (regardless of how active they are) can post to the hobbiest board.

I think there are conversation topics that are inherintly suited for guys or gals. Although providers (or guys) may not be able to "contribute" to a particular topic, by reading the responses - one side may be able to learn something useful about the other. Those conversations make sense on the regional (or national) board. The problem comes in (IMO) when a topic that is targeted to one side of the curtain is inundated with irrelevent comments from people that cannot possibly comment on the subject.

For example, if a guy posts: "Do you prefer  using a ladies incall vs. doing outcall? Why"? How can a provider respond to that? She may be able to learn from the responses, but she can't honestly contribute without making an extreme stretch. A poster shouldn't have to state the obvious. But, it appears some form of statement may be necessary at times to keep things on topic.

There are also conversation topics that don't benefit both sides of the curtain. I know, people say: well don't read them! The problem here is that as the frequency of those or irrelevant posts (taking the above example) grow, separating the relevent from the irrelevant (wheat from chaffe) consumes more of a persons time. As that time demand grows, the hobbiest will start to seek alternative avenues for information. If hobbiests curtail reading TER for information - the effectiveness of this as a medium to do buisness diminshes.

And, reiterating this, IMO those posters that frequently don't stay on topic lose there effectiveness in communicating. Hence my reference to the ladies that I consider top tier (wether from afar or from personal experience) rarely post and I know when they do post it will be on-topic, informative and at times friggen hilarious!

BTW, did you think I was suggesting that providers that over-post were (only) posting drivel? I was not. My reference to over-posting was a hint to ladies: Guys pay attention and form opinions based on the available information. If a lady has difficulty staying "on topic" on TER, why would I feel I could have a comfortable conversation with her during refractory?

Thor

-- Modified on 9/14/2007 9:52:02 AM

I am sorry but my response was suppose to be directly under the Gallop Pole and not so much under yours. That was my mistake. Sorry.

In regards to answering a topic that is meant for the gentlemen, I agree that a provider can't really answer the question you mentioned and I think most of the time we do tend to stay away from those, however it really goes both ways. The hobbyists do the same to the ladies threads.

Threads get highjacked all the time and many times the answers have very little to do with the initial question. Do we want this? Not really, but we don't live in a perfect world and after all, it is a discussion board and I think Dingus is doing a great job of keeping this place 'trouble' free.

The 'drivel' was a word I used because someone else used that word a while back and like I said earlier, my post was suppose to be an answer to The Gallop Pole and not to yours.

I tend to agree with you and over posting, and that the less a person post the more valuable the information becomes. However who are we to tell other ladies and gentlemen what WE think is important? We can only decide what WE want to write, what kinds of threads we want to answer etc, so of course you have the right to feel whatever it is you feel in regards to a provider that over post. And you have the right to meet whoever you wish to see in regards to your observations here on the board etc.

You are making several valid points and I can certainly respect that.

What it comes down to really I think is that we each take responsibility for what we write, when we write and that we stand behind what we write (ie, using NO aliases) and hopefully at the end of the day we feel pretty good about ourselves and what we have accomplished throughout the day.

In regards to gentlemen writing on the hobbyist board, I am not sure what the requirements are to write there, however I am sure most people who do write on THIS board can, because most of them do have reviews written and if I am not wrong that is the criteria that has to be met in order to write there. The criteria for a provider; she has to have reviews on her profile in order to write on the Provider Only board.

I see very little use to write on the provider board because my questions I have are for the providers and/or hobbyist here in Phoenix. If I had a general question I'd rather put it here than  on the National Provider Board because I don't know anyone there, I have never met any of them and therefor I feel better about putting it right here where people know me, they have met me and if they are lucky they actually know a little about who I am.

I really don't believe that providers over post because they want to be 'seen' (like people suggest all the time here on the board) but I do think they feel that they are part of something and if you think about it, we do not have 'coworkers' to talk to on the coffee break because we work either from a small incall with very few personal things around us or from out home where nobody is than ourselves. Most ladies do have work hours and after that they do have another life, but in between clients what do they do? I have no idea, but I know what I do, I sit infront of my computer, writing things, buying things online, planning trips AND I read TER. I do many other things as well, but I can't go outside doing yard work, because it is hotter than 'hell' and to be sweaty and then come inside to meet a gentlemen certainly wouldn't work.

So, I didn't mean to post under your answer (that was my mistake) but I wanted to answer the thread because this is a discussion board, it belongs to all of us, and if someone has a problem with ladies writing here, then I suggest write an email to the provider, OR go to the 'guys' board and there you will be free of any providers and you can write to your hearts content without interference.

(So when I write 'you' in my long resume above, I don't mean you 'thor18' personally. I am sure you get that, I just wanted to be clear).

Have a wonderful day

And many 'pussar och kramar'
Swedish Anna

and I see the "guys" running a fowl of a thread that a "Lady" has started with their off subject rants also. There seems to be a core of people here that understand the Boards and/or threads' intent. I do enjoy most of the posts and comments here. We have a great group going. Keep it up