Coincidental to the recent atmosphere on this board, I sat in my favorite restaurant today and listened to the guy at the next table talking to his girlfriend and his office.  (He literally had phones on both ears at once!)  His language was vile, and the attitudes he was expressing were self-absorbed, demanding, and boorish.  He appeared to be just as bad with the business calls as with the girlfriend.  (I wasn't eavesdropping because he was interrupting my conversation with his volume!)

The Gallop Pole for today asks you this:  Do you believe that people sometimes get more of what they want by being rude, insensitive and profane?  Conversely, has our society given up on penalizing people for such behavior?  Also, if you consider yourself to generally be nice, polite and thoughtful, have you ever been tempted to shed that habit in favor of being a bit rougher with others?  How did it work out?

KEEP YOUR RESPONSES GENERIC.  Please do not make reference to anything or anyone here on TER.  This poll is about the world we live in, not this fantasy-land where we play.

in my line of work all of the above apply..i deal with all kinds of people at a time they when they are at there worst and have to constantly adjust to there attitudes( usually not to good)and there situations.( no i'm not a cop,but i wish to leave it right there).i hear more f bombs daily than most folks hear in a year..it does get to me at times,but i generally kill em with kindness..its really a great tool..as far as society goes,i feel our younger generation watches to much tv. shows that the basic message is its cool to flip out and beat the hell out of someone..ok to swear WEAREVER you are,and generally be a jerk..check out any street corner or for that matter just go to a restuarant.i think the majority of us deal with it becuase for the most part,were not confrentational(sp)..besides ,gas has gotten to expensive for my flamethrower

Donald Trump is a God.....where has treating people with respect gone......I learned along time ago that character is more important that reputation.....and people worry too much about what they make or how they are perceived rather than working on the fiber of their character.....I have posted in an alias because many on this board think I'm an asshole.....I'm really not, just a bit disgusted with what I see here.

GP, thanks for the posting.

People who are rude, insensitive and profane IMHO are a product of our new society and the influence or lack thereof their parents exercised over them.  Yes, I do believe society no longer penalizes them for their behavior.  Where this all started is any bodies guess.  You might say it started with OJ, the preferential treatment given to the elite of society (if you want to call politicians, professional athletes, etc. elite), maybe with the "I want it now, but yesterday would be better generation", to ignore is safer than to confront attitude, and just possibly the hand slapping for wrong deeds, words, actions  or the hand slapping for something that looks wrong but is being celebrated.  I for one always speak my mind, I hope I do so in a polite manner.  Though there are times people take me wrong or out of context which I attribute to my English heritage, wry sense of humour - that sort of thing.  I think I get away with alot due to the honesty and tone, even though to some I might be insulting.  It can be a catch twenty two in some ways.  If you complain about a service, or the quality of a product one could be perceived as being rude or insensitive.  In my previous life there were times when being "rougher with others" was necessary and warranted.  But alas, being rude, insensitive and profane in public has no place and serves no product purpose.

-- Modified on 4/27/2006 5:57:01 PM

I invariably deal with professionals at significant crisis points (both professionally and personally). I get complemented for being bluntly honest and truthful at a time when this is what my clients are getting the least of. In the end honesty and forthright presentation are critical under stress. Do manners count....yes...and tact is a gift, but many are more interested in perception and being "PC" then in being honest and forthcoming. In the end the ability to be honest is your greatest asset.....

and considerate, polite and tactful, all at the same time.  Too many people use "I'm just being honest" to rationalize bad behavior.  You have set up a false dilemma.  Be both.  Then TWICE as many of your clients will compliment you.

-- Modified on 4/28/2006 9:27:14 AM

and I am in no way advocating cruelty over compassion. I actually have a tremendous amount of respect for all of you (the gals) and find certain aspects of what you do facinating (professionally).

It so happens I have a "friend" who has terminal cancer. He was in remission for about 14 months or so before it came storming back. He happened to run into the original surgeon in the elevator and asked her what % of patients survived his original prognosis....she looked at him and bluntly said....none. He asked her why she didnt tell him that two years ago?

I'm not trying to defend my occasional lack of tact, a skill which is both a natural gift and an acquired skill....I'm simply arguing that "tact" at the expense of honesty is not a benifit.

I do think that oftentimes my comments are taken somewhat out of context (not always...just sometimes). For example I actually wrote "makes you look like a d!^@*". Someone else posted a statement basically saying...gee I was thinking the same thing. Now thats not calling the individual in question a ditz....its an observation about how an action might be percieved. Hell I just told the CEO of a 300 million dollar company he'd look like a horses ass (exact words)if he followed thru with his "plan A"...and he pays me a 100 grand a year. He called me back 10 minutes later and told me his wife said the same thing (not same words) while he was shaving that morning....