I was at the mall this weekend having a cup of coffee at the food court.  I noticed an old man watching a teenager sitting next to him who had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue.  The old man was obviously engrossed with the hair because kept staring at teenager.

Every time the boy looked up, he'd find the old man staring.  Finally the teenager had enough and he sarcastically
asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"

The old man, without missing a beat, responded, "Yeal sonny, got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son?"....

that was exceptional. I love startin the day with a great laugh. Reminded me of an onry ole cuss I know.