I'd get a life and realize I was paying to have a friend.

Dude, I don't see the point of it. If you connect and have a good time at that moment that is all that matters. Birthdays, Holidays... remember the nature of the relationship. Besides what are birthdays but a meaningless attempt to quantify our existance in the abyss of infiniti, although yesterday no longer exists, all that it was may affect all that is now, tomorrow is never promised and is always unsure, all you have is now. I would suggest not wasting now on such concerns. Grab life and ride it for all it's worth. Leave the details to drones.
Carpe Diem

I read your message of 5/14.  Sounds like you are more concerned that you are never going to see her again than that she forgot her birthday.

It is interesting how you can go to any city message board and outside of the local providers, everyone is talking about the same thing which is long term relationships with a particular provider.

The underlying theme has been this is a business for them and when the money runs out or someone else gives them something better, then they are gone.  Then again, maybe she just disappeared for awhile and will resurface.  We all have  friends who you don't see for months at a time and who forget or never knew your birthday but are close.

Just gotta wait and see

I think I can understand how you feel, but ask yourself whether you would be equally offended by the fact that your accountant, lawyer, or doctor of four years forgot your birthday.  In most cases, despite representations of themselves as a "GFE", the best of the providers know that are being paid to make you feel good - not just physically, but emotionally and psychologically - and they ARE professionals - they will do their best to do so no matter how they actually feel.  If you want a friend, you are looking in the wrong place.  I have no doubt that friendships are formed between hobbyists and providers, but an off-the-clock friendship happens much more rarely than the provider would like you to believe.  I would just suggest that you step back and look at the relationship objectively and THEN ask yourself if it is worth having your feelings hurt over.  I would also suggest that you follow Occularblues advice, which is good for your whole life, as far as I am concerned.

Peace, brother.


-- Modified on 5/16/2003 10:48:12 AM

Although every thing said is true.  I must say but... People are people.  If I make friends with the cashier at the grocery store what is the diffrence?  Anytime someone who you think is a friend lets you down it hurts.

I've forgotten my friends birthdays and I've known them for 5 years! Maybe she just isn't that good at remembering things like that.

We didn't just see each other in the business sense; we went out as friends (I didn't even have to pay for her time).  Sometimes she even paid the way.  Also, it wasn't unusal for us to call each other 5 - 15 times a week just to say "hi".  Sometimes we talked for a few minutes.  Other calls lasted nearly an hour.

I'm fully aware that nothing could ever come of this relationship, but it still makes me wonder.

appreciate being remember when it happens but don't expect it.  several weeks after seeing a service lady, she called and left a message wishing me a happy bd that she found out from just having seen my driver's license.  however, my own family will forget my birthday sometimes.

-- Modified on 5/17/2003 12:28:36 PM