I am completely jealous of you!!! Not really I agree completely with you. I try to get my ATF client to see other ladies... But I have been hearing from gents lately that i cannot give you a reference becuase my ATF will get mad. I try to explain that she will not that as much as we love you guys this is still an business relationship even if we are friends & lovers. But I do have alternate screening for those of you who choose not to give references.

Naughtiness
Kadi

Actually, I know you wouldn't be jealous, at least if you are anything like my ATF.  Hell, I run things by her first because she usually knows more about the ladies than I do and will let me know if a lady would be a good fit for me.  And my ATF always gives a reference - she likes me to be happy and would rather I see someone she knows I would have a great time with then take a shot in the dark.  And I love her for it!  Actually, I love her for a lot of reasons, mainly because she is just a damn fine person and a great friend.

I read a previous post on this board that stated "although, there is nothing wrong with feeling emotionally attached to someone that you have shared such intimate moments with the sad fact is you met via this hobby and a hobbyist/provider relationship is all that your going to have."  I think that's where the whole jealously issue comes to play.  When a guy gets too emotionally involved and can't separate the traditional relationship from the hobbyist/provider relationship they'll assume the same goes for the ladies in the industry as well and think that seeing someone else will hurt their relationship with that ATF.  I once read a statement on a providers website that said, “Just as each provider is different, so are the clients.  I maintain a clear understanding that you as the client are making an investment in the time we share.  I will make every reasonable attempt to accommodate your desires and make our date one you will remember and want to repeat again and again.”  Now that’s a great way to look at your hobbyist/provider relationship…an investment with mutual gains on both ends.  Although I’m still new to this hobby I think that if you do care for a woman in this industry all you should really hope and wish for her is her safety and happiness and not worry about something as silly as jealousy.  Just my two cents….

If a guy has a great experience, there's a tinge of loyalty there, along with a tinge of guilt if he goes elsewhere.  Society says variety really isn't ok - especially from a woman's perspective - and we guys know this.  Non-hobby women don't appreciate the need for variety!

I contacted providers recently only after another with whom I had a good experience wasn't going to be in town (you know who you are).  Plus, from a risk perspective, it's lower to visit someplace you've already been, so to speak.

All you people (ladies and business owners)in the industry should find a way to give or get references on a common basis.  Some sort of data base or call center or something like that.  All of you need to be safe from bad people and LI.  There's a lot of smart people in your groupe with alot of resources...I play veiw and far between...when I tried to get a reference froma past provider we couldn't get ahold of her in a timely manner...just a thought...

A potential client who has told me that.  All of them were able to give me a provider as a reference(and I do check them).  I have, however, contacted providers who would not give me a reference and either were nasty to me or acted like they did not know the guy, when in fact they had seen them many times.  It only made them look bad though and of course, karma will come back to bite them in the butt.  We, as providers need to help each other(even those who are not in our "clique") if we expect the hobby to stay safe and successful.  We really are all connected whether we realize it or not, and to not work together, we are, in essence, hurting ourselves in the long run.  It really bothers me though, that some of the ladies that act so "nice" on public boards are not really that nice when a reference is needed.