Philadelphia
Disclosing ethnic bigotry = bad for business
Saw a certain CL provider for the second time this afternoon and am unlikely to return for several reasons. I don't want to name her so soon after my visit.
Anyway, she began confiding to me about the overdue rent on her incall crashpad after the session as we were getting dressed. She proceeds to launch into a verbal stereotype of the ethnicity of her landlord. Unfortunately, she has no idea that I too am of that ethnicity! I elected not to confront her or disclose that fact to her since I privately had decided honestly by that time for hobbying reasons not to see her again (rushed session, unsanitary room conditions, etc).
I just was so surprised by the stupidity of the rant to me that I thought I'd share it with the class here. Most of you providers seem like you have good heads on your shoulders and don't need to be told that Business 101 should dictate that bigotry disclosure can restrict your business. I suppose a caveat would be that providers can discriminate intentionally per your comfort levels outweighing political correctness and whatever added business loss. Providers obviously aren't bound by any legislation on this issue. I guess I'm more talking about UNINTENTIONAL off-the-cuff cultural remarks. For example, you also might have no idea whether the client has a SO or friend from that ethnicity.
Now I'll defeat partially my own message by stereotyping my belief that many CL providers might have a lower educational level and less business savvy than TER providers and so could be more prone to such errors in judgment. I probably am preaching to the choir here but thought I'd pass along these thoughts while fresh in my mind.
I've run into similar situations, not only with CL providers, but also with more established ones. Like you, I decided to protest by not repeating.
It is my contention, and please correct me if I'm wrong, that anyone who is prone to spewing bigotry to strangers is likely unaware of the fundamental rules of humanity.
Sorry this happened.
Why bring this up if you aren't going to give us the details? (I'm not suggesting you name the provider).
It's irrelevant which ethnicity was disparaged and what she said. I bring this up from a financial, business perspective. Tell you what..I'll disclose one telling phrase. I find it's ordinarily not a good idea to say things like, "You know how THOSE people are?" especially when you unwittingly are talking to one of THOSE people.
Anyway, I just thought it ashame. An uncomfortable silence followed while I tried to think of something to change the subject. She has other much nicer qualities in and out of bed. I'm no saint and not pretending to be. I didn't go home and cry about it, am not going to write a review on it, and did not intend to come across as a whiner on it...sorry if I did.
I seldom create new threads. I had not come across one quite like this so I thought it could be informative. My usual posts ordinarily are lighter in nature. Thanks for your input.
p.s. And I still have my mid-90s Anna Nicole calendar in a storage box somewhere so hats off to your nic.
-- Modified on 4/27/2007 7:30:39 AM
Thank u for your post. You did not come off as a whiner and those that think so completely missed the point. There will always be those that just "don't get it"
Thanks
No doubt you are referring to my ethnic group and as a Swedish American, I'm tired of it....
I was with a provider and after the session, when she went to get a towel from the bathroom, she exclaimed "I don't understand why this hotel has to be so Jewish with the towels.
I gave her a piece of my mind and left rather hastily. Needless to say never saw her again.
It's been my observation that most people carry some sort of baggage. Let's face it, most providers were not raised in an open loving environment. Oh, and by the way, there aren't many blue ribbons hanging off most hobbiest either, despite our better upbringing.
What I hate more than racist ranting are people who rant over racist rants. Everyone needs to vent once in a while. What better sign that true racism is missing than someone feeling comfortable enough to rant directly to the race they are pissed about.
Everyone thinks they need to answer venting, when in reality, venting is an answer in and of itself.
Having said all that, I appreciate your venting and I hope you appreciate mine.
Your inferring that you can't say anything you want about whom ever you want. Proposterious.
Nice one, I-man...how's the job search? I understand that Rutgers is looking for a PI officer...lol...
and call brothers Al and Jesse to help out.
I won't even dignify the commment with a response, you ridulous little man.
You can say whatever you want to whomever you want. Just remember the things that you say can and will have consequences. It is my right to say president Bush is a murderer and an incompetent idiot and I wish he were dead.
If that comment gets back to the secret service or FBI it is also their right to lock my silly ass up for terroristic threats.
GOD bless America.......
...wish he was dead? You've got to be kidding. They'd lock you up alright but not for being a terrorist. They'd lock you up in the local nut house for being...well, silly. Imus can say or do anything he wants. The problem is he'll land on his feet somewhere else and spew his thoughtless drivel to the masses.
I'm trying to figure out if ANYTHING you said reflects a "better upbringing".
-- Modified on 4/27/2007 3:59:09 PM
Hello how are you,
I am so sorry that this had to happen to you.....
I agree with you in some ways that some CL providers are of a lower educational level. But there are a few of us that are very intelligent, articulate, and classy. I post on CL because it is a good marketing tool. I have met some very good gents through CL. I have made some very good friends through CL.
I agree with you. I have a second session tentatively scheduled this weekend with a different CL girl. I hope to learn more about her. She's from Central America, still learning English, but seems classy and charming to me. Fortunately, I know some Spanish so we can laugh over my broken Spanish.
I hope you have fun......
-- Modified on 4/27/2007 6:08:00 PM
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