I am a newbie, but many of the providers i wish to set up an appointment with require a provider reference.  if i'm a first timer... how do i get around this?

Most escorts have their screening policy on their websites. If not email to ask her what else she'll accept to verify you.

You may want to take this type of request to the FAQ for Newbies board, but one alternative is to register with Roomservice 2000.  Maybe your provider will accept a reference from them?