There is no higher calling in life than providing a service.
Good or ill, I assume the best in people. My compassion is tempered by wisdom - so I simply do not throw my emotions or material things around - but I do not approach things assuming someone is out to get me. My take is that if they are, they are living in their own personal hell - and what more could I add to it.
I prefer to get to know my friends. While the physical aspects certainly take a significant part of the encounter - I like to take my time, meander, amuse. There is nothing more erotic to me than discussing a rather mundane life story while providing pleasure to your companion. There is something about discussing life's oddities when the two parties are nude and one is getting excited– it forces a level of honesty.
This is why I think the hobby is special. You have a define set of time to play out a fantasy, work out frustrations, perhaps provide the shoulder to cry on - in short, simply just be a absurd human being. As a result, sure there is a level of attachment that develops. My perspective however is that the encounter is for a short period of time, you both get a release and resume your public personas (boss, employee, mother, father, husband, wife, whatever). The hobby allows you to focus on the now and not obsess about the future or past. Attachments are simply a bonus. IN any case, communicate with your friend – a relationship is simply what two people agree to.
Of course I can't help but Zen out on this stuff - thus I believe the acronym is YMMV.
I got into this ''hobby'' over 2 years ago after suffering thru a divorce and a subsequent 5 months of a celibate existence. So I got online and preceded to search for companions and came across a magnificent redhead that was lights out the best experience I have ever had with a woman. I preceded to become a regular with her and , at 1st, monthly then to twice monthly visits with her.
I preceded to become involved in an ultimately disappointing ''civvie'' relationship. In that time I saw my redhead friend only 3 times in 6 months. When the relationship ended my companion was there with a warm shoulder as well as everything else. I see her now weekly, and we have become very good friends. We have made one trip together and I plan to take her on a vacation this year as well.
I can say she is the only provider I have seen. And the emotional support she has shown me is more important as the usual reason we see providers. I also know that my provider friend is always happy to see me an has gifted me at my birthdays and Christmas, and lets me ''have it'' if I go more than a week. lol. And I know that my presence has soothed her when she was troubled as well. Because of this I see no reason to see any other providers.
Am I the only one? Are there other guys out there that became friends with a provider to the exclusion of other providers? Are there any providers that get attached to one of their ''regulars'' like mine has? Just interested to know what you all think I guess.
Bignut1961- I don't find it odd that you've chosen to see one companion exclusively. As a matter of fact, I think it's fabulous. Outsiders (civvies) tend to view our entertainment industry as primarily a sexual exchange. However, I beg to differ. Although, there are select gentlemen that prefer a "slam... bam ... thank you ma'am" scenario, I wouldn't hesitate to say their the minority. The majority of the gentlemen, that I spend time with, prefers a woman that's intellectual, witty, understanding and charismatic. Their looking for the "complete package", someone who can carry on a conversation and shares the same interests.
Paris Bouvier
"Attached to you" ? That may or may not be true. As long as your emotional need is being met though, then it's all well and good.
Fantasy? Reality?....Who the hell cares, if it feels right, then it's right for you.
Hell, we would all be crazy not to want to love one of these women. I personally have to shy away from that, i'm not good at knowing, i'm sharing her with other men. That's just me though.
Interesting thread. I too became a hobbyist about a year and a half ago upon separation. I like to experiment with different girls sometimes (its always fun), but I find it to be more rewarding all around if I can find a friend. Its rare, but it is possible. I always book 2 hour dates, but I look for providers who are willing to go out to dinner or on a date first, off the clock. Many wont do so, at least at first (and I understand that) but some will. And after some time, it only seems natural to exchange a good deal of our life experiences. IMHO a good provider can give us more than sex - she can give companionship, fun, and an understanding ear. And I know that, in return, I can give her much more than money. Its not love. I have to keep reminding myself that the day may come when one or the other of us needs to move on. It really sucks when that happens. But good friendship is a great thing and pursuing it seems worth the risk to me. And, btw, I enjoy the challenge of suppressing my jealosy. I've always believed that jealosy is a terribly destructive force. A friendship with a provider is a great test of my ability to live up to my ideals.
We all come to this wonderful hobby for different reasons--variety, thrills and companionship. I have be fortunate to meet many wonderful women this way and have become friends with several of them and we routinely update each other on our "other" lives. This hobby is far more important to me than simply sex-- although that is wonderful too!
There is no higher calling in life than providing a service.
Good or ill, I assume the best in people. My compassion is tempered by wisdom - so I simply do not throw my emotions or material things around - but I do not approach things assuming someone is out to get me. My take is that if they are, they are living in their own personal hell - and what more could I add to it.
I prefer to get to know my friends. While the physical aspects certainly take a significant part of the encounter - I like to take my time, meander, amuse. There is nothing more erotic to me than discussing a rather mundane life story while providing pleasure to your companion. There is something about discussing life's oddities when the two parties are nude and one is getting excited– it forces a level of honesty.
This is why I think the hobby is special. You have a define set of time to play out a fantasy, work out frustrations, perhaps provide the shoulder to cry on - in short, simply just be a absurd human being. As a result, sure there is a level of attachment that develops. My perspective however is that the encounter is for a short period of time, you both get a release and resume your public personas (boss, employee, mother, father, husband, wife, whatever). The hobby allows you to focus on the now and not obsess about the future or past. Attachments are simply a bonus. IN any case, communicate with your friend – a relationship is simply what two people agree to.
Of course I can't help but Zen out on this stuff - thus I believe the acronym is YMMV.
I have many clients who I developed a real friendship with. Just like in any other business - sometiems we meet people that we really click with and we want to continue to stay in touch away from the business side of things.
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