Dear friends ,provider and hobbyists.
I have contacted a very nice ,well reviewed Toronto provider for a 3 hour date in late January.Since I haven't been in the hobby for a few years I wasn't able to get a reference from a provider and I agreed to submit my ID to pass trough screening.
She immediately responded to me and booked us a 3 hour date including some social time which I will definitely enjoy since I enjoy a good conversation and good food and drinks.As a matter of fact I asked her to extend the date to a 5 hour arrangement, so we can have enough time to visit a very nice restaurant and enjoy ourselves behind closed doors without any rush.
I sent her 2 emails, but have not heard back from her.Please advise me on what to do, since I don't want her to feel that I am bothering her with too many emails.
Your help will be appreciated.
Thank you
Five hours is too long for a first date, because there might be bad chemistry or worse. 60 or 90 minutes is a more reasonable request, because that's a more tolerable duration if things are awkward. Or if you turn out to be a no-show, she has a potentially high opportunity cost if she turns down others. The reason you haven't heard back either way yet is because she is probably still trying to decide if the potential gain is worth the potential risk.
Don't send her any more emails and wait a couple of days for a response to the ones that you have already sent. In the mean time, start looking around for a Plan B.
What she may be thinking about is whether or not to ask you for a deposit to reserve that long a block of her time.
I am normally 100% against sending deposits to secure a date, but there are times when the ladies really do need to protect themselves, and blocking out a half a day for someone she not only has never seen before, but has no references to boot is probably one of those times.
Your gut reaction about sending too many emails is the right one, I'd give her a few days to get back to you as your date is still a good six weeks away before bothering her again. If she is as well reviewed as you say, sending something to guarantee your date would not be out of line. I wouldn't volunteer it, but I would be prepared for her to ask.
As far as her not getting back to you right away, she may just be busy, or she might not want you to start expecting her to be a "pen pal" for the next few weeks leading up to your date. By not getting right back to you, she might just be managing your expectations about how often the two of you are going to communicate.
I don,t have a problem sending a deposit and I understand everything you said.I am not looking for a pen pall .I just want her to have a good time and the same for myself.I understand her being reluctant?Thank you for advice.
I would like to also say that I am not exactly a newbie.I was just retired for a couple of years and have lost my connections.
Thank you very much for your help
...Did you make it clear to her that you were willing to increase the donation for extending the date?
I thought it goes without saying extended date extended pay
Is it a good idea to pm provider in a couple of days/