Look, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to see this guy is a phoney and a class A jerk. You want nothing to do with him, NOTHING.
It's definitely not your job to educate him beyond his current Neanderthal existence. And even if you wanted to it's highly unlikely you would have been able to. Your computer has a "delete" button. It's a valuable tool. Use it.
Any response at all will only encourage him and he might be smart enough to locate you and become a stalker. There are a lot of dangerous people out there and not all of them wear badges.
Hey Natalie. I came across ur page on backpage when I noticed ur beauty and booty...perfect package! This would be my ffirst time with an escort. Just wanted to get to know you so we can then hopefully meet on a regular basis. You can call or text me @ (number). I'm into whatever you're into. My favorite is eating ur ass from the back...not to be disrespectful. Get back to me when you can. Name is Lui!
My response.
Hi there Luis,
First of all, I am really flattered that you chose me to be your first experience with a provider. It's always interesting to have people who are relatively new and don't know what to expect.
Since you don't have any experience with 'providers', I'll give you a heads up. You may want to join a major site that has a newbie advice section, so you know what to do and what not to do. (Like discussing sexual activities before you've met) It raises a red flag and most providers won't even return the initial email to even let you know that you did a no-no. Try theeroticreview.com
I do not see gentlemen who do not have a provider to reference them and show me that they are safe people who can be trusted, since I use my home as my incall. You should try joining preffered411 or datecheck which will verify you enough for outcall backpage girls (to gain references) and enable you to schedule bookings with ladies that are more rigid in their preferences.
You also should have read my site better, since it states, several times, that I do not call or text until an appointment is confirmed. I prefer email only contact. The FAQ and etiquette pages are there for a reason. I know I sound like a worry-wart, but it only takes one interaction with LE to lose my day job and home.
When you get some references, please get back to me. I'd love to play with you.
-Natalie
You weren't harsh at all and you even gave him some tips he obviously needs.
BTW, after seeing the pic on the front page of your site, I think maybe Louis is on to something!
No, you were most polite actually and offered some constructive ideas as to how one should conduct themselves. You did it right - tastefully and respecfully, without violating your standards. I doubt I would have been as understanding.
he was very stupid or just ignorant of the 'rules'. If I were a provider, I would not see him.....PERIOD!!!!! He isn't worth the chance until he gets some refs or maybe some reviews.
Just my opinion as a hobbyist.
Swim
because you could easily have said something that could legally be construed as an admission against interest.
I have personal knowledge of emails similar to the one you describe being used by LE to trip up providers.
Best bet is to totally ignore and block the email addy in the future.
Be safe
GTM
So, I remember those bewbs! Girl, you are totally cute and those bewbs ROCK!
I agree with all, and especially GTM. You weren't harsh, but you probably should have also ditched him. He's probably a newbie, but you never know.
Also, using your personal home for incalls is bad juju. MAYBE, and only maybe, for VERY well established regulars... And certainly never, EVER, let someone know this is your home.
EVER! NEVER!
I don't mean to yell, but there are enough weirdos out there, that you WILL meet one at some point. Be safe please and send him packing elsewhere until he has referrals..
Hi Natalie,
I think you were very considerate and articulate. You are potentially converting a lost soul into a periodic revenue stream while helping someone feel good.
My only critique is that you didn't get his name correct in your response.
"Name is Lui!"
Enthusiastic fucker, I see.
You addressed him as "Luis."
"Remember that a man's Name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language." -- Dale Carnegie, How To Win Friends and Influence People
Best,
Red
P.S. Please reconsider about using your home as your incall.
His email name was Luis; I figured I'd use his full name, to show him I meant biznuss, lol.
Also, it's not actually my home, but it's a rented incall that has been setup to be very homey, and the idea of you're joining me in my home, yadda yadda, seems to make gentlemen more comfortable.
does it state about calls and texts? He didn't indicate he saw your web site; just your ad on BP.
The ad is setup so that you HAVE to visit the site in order to contact me. Having gentlemen able to contact straight from the ad got to be a little bit of a PITA, since I had to restate every-single-thing on my site.
You were very kind in responding. As someone already mentioned, using your home as your incall can be problematic and mentioning it in a response really is a no no. Best of luck in the future!
I would have simply hit delete.
Trying to educate him puts you in a very precarious position as you have already acknowledged his request for sexual services. Trying to dance around it does not make it safer for you to meet him in the future.
Even if he is not a legal threat, he has shown that he is not respectful enough to give you a proper introduction, or to read your website and contact information, or to follow your directions. If he is like that on-line he will likely be worse in person. (As an aside, almost anyone who tells you in an initial contact that they want to meet on a regular basis is full of sh!t. The guys looking for a regular lady are usually quite particular and only consider such an arrangement AFTER they have felt the chemistry.)
A final thought, you should not let strangers know so much information about your incall. In fact, for your security I hope that you will consider removing that comment from your post.
You have a great customer service attitude and I'm sure you'll do great! Just remember that this business is NOT socially accepted and can be dangerous... not all customers are good customers, and a bad request needs not take up your time.
With wishes for your safety and prosperity,
Sola
-- Modified on 3/17/2010 9:53:20 PM
In my experience the men who state they are looking to see you on a regular basis never become regulars. Ever. Most times they never even book a single date.
Also, if they send an email like that (sexually explicit) you have a 90% chance they are time wasters getting off on the email or phone exchange.
When you have been in this business a while you can spot a time waster in 5 seconds flat and will simply delete. You had your heart in the right place but you wasted your time trying to educate a man who was likely toying with you.
Also, as others have stated, working out of your home can be pretty dangerous.
Good luck to you!
Red
I should have nixed the eating your ass stuff.
8o)
Personally, that email was too explicit and I would not have responded to it.
I have a standard, canned, response to inquiries with no info who have obviously not read my site. It is something like this:
Hello ____ ,
Thanks for contacting me thru mu ad. I'm available only for multi-hour dinner dates and longer. I love making a real night of it, and letting things flow naturally. My site is http://RachaelBenedict.com and is quite informative on how I do things, and how to go about meeting me.
I hope that you peruse it thoroughly, decide that we're a great match, and that we can get together for a memorable evening together,
thanks,
Rachael
In general excellant... but you should not reveal you work from home. I don't think you should have mentioned the LE consequences. You might have said "...for obivious reasons."
skb
First off, I would have given you full disclosure, including real name, physical stats, and references. I would have NEVER mentioned anything regarding potential activities, or $.
Second, I would have blown off any provider who had to mention LE, or other potential risks, in her initial response. Not as a knock on you, but as a knock on me.
Your response was too revealing in regards to stating that you entertain at your home. You shouldn't allow strangers there, but you can probably allow your regulars to do so, once you have established a trust level. Just saying...
Newbies don't learn the rules, ropes or responsibilities unless and until someone points them out.
Look, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to see this guy is a phoney and a class A jerk. You want nothing to do with him, NOTHING.
It's definitely not your job to educate him beyond his current Neanderthal existence. And even if you wanted to it's highly unlikely you would have been able to. Your computer has a "delete" button. It's a valuable tool. Use it.
Any response at all will only encourage him and he might be smart enough to locate you and become a stalker. There are a lot of dangerous people out there and not all of them wear badges.
I don't 'work from home', I use a rented space, but thanks everyone for the concern. xoxo