I like the gfe and a BJ ending?
Is this unusual or somewhat common?

Hobbiests and providers can answer.

and not a rarity either. Do whatever you like and make sure you read reviews. Some offer those, others do not... reviews will let you know what really goes on, so that you can find the best matches for what turns you on!

I've had some encounters with gentlemen who prefer to just have some innocent fun and maybe get to you know better and after a few times, they may request a little bit more action or even none.
I think some people just want the whole GFE experience and don't really need to go all the way, my main goal is just to make them feel comfortable with whatever choice they make.

I have had some sessions with my ATF where all we did was DFK and Daty. And we both walked away satisfied. Not every date has to have everything on the menu or be scripted.

Fucking with a condom isn't as stimulating as having a good BBBJ.

Many a provider bristle at the thought of being bargained down, and fully believe their time is worth so much money whether they are doing FS or otherwise.

Also, you should not be discussing money or sex acts until you are BCD; so tread lightly on this path.

with the gals I see.  Very often I'll see someone and will enjoy some kind of oral session or end up coming on various parts of their body.

Some gals love FS so they insist on it.

I try to do things as openly as possible and go with the flow, so to speak.

Then politely ask the provider whether she would consider doing an oral-only session for a certain amount.

Most providers in this economy, methinks, will at least consider it.

It's all in how you deliver it.

Newbs should NOT be haggling prices with providers. Most vets cant and shouldnt but for a newb? Ummmm....no. Go for the oral only session if he wants but he should pay the whole freight. The last thing this guy needs is a black mark against him and one less possible reference for him to use because he cheaped out and tried to bargain basement a lady.

And as MrFish points out, that would also cause him to talk about sex for money. Another major hobby no no for everyone. But for a newbie? She is very likely not to respond to any more of his contacts and he would have received that awful advice from you on this board!

Look you often give good and sound advice but you brain farted here. Twice.

on both counts.  CS, I can't believe you told a newb to do that.   I seriously doubt too many vets would take your advice.

One, her rate is her rate, how much of her service you wish to partake in is up to you.  It's never a good idea to try to negotiate rates.  Two, just mentioning 'oral-only' is an open discussion of a sex act, which, as we all know, or are supposed to know, is just not a smart thing to talk about openly.

To the OP, please disregard crazyshit's suggestions and do not attempt to do it.  It will only lead to trouble for you, IMHO.

Swim

If you present it as bargaining, then it will be taken as such.  If you present it as this is the kind of session I am looking for, and do you provide it, then it will be taken completely different.

Or maybe I am just good at doing this.  I dunno.

It certainly isn't something that every single provider will offer or be open to, and I never stated it as such.

A bumbling oaf might not be able to do this, but you can present it in a way where it is not bargaining.  It is a different type of session altogether and should not be looked at as a cheapskate, limited option.

But I do agree with you that this maybe isn't the best thing for a newbie to try.

Is it something that can be done?  Absolutely.  But you have to do it in a way that asks, "Hey, I was looking for something like this.  Is it something you offer?"  Not, "Hi, I'm looking to bargain you down."

Should a newbie attempt this?  Maybe not.  But the consequences are not even as close to as dire as the three of you make it out to be.  Maybe it's because I have been doing this long enough to know what I can and cannot say to a provider.  But there certainly is a way to ask this without it coming off as offensive.

I am not talking about negotiating rates.  It is a different service you are asking for, not LESS service for a LOWER rate.  If she doesn't offer it, then she doesn't offer it.  Simple.  No harm, no foul.

There are ways to go about it, but given the response I got from the three of you, there's no need for me to go into how I have asked this and done it without offending anyone.

The notion that the guy will get blacklisted is just stupid.  As stupid as the fuckwad that said, "Never talk about rates in any way."  Bullshit.  Girls talk about rates all the time in their emails to you.  That is never a hard and fast rule.  You have to establish context.  I just spent (no kidding) 40 PMs going back and forth undoing the shit advice that someone on this board gave to this guy who just saw a provider for the first time.

You and I have corresponded via PM several times, and I know you to be a reasonable provider and a reasonable person.

I do agree that his best bet is to find a provider that provides the session he is looking for, as opposed to trying to get a lower rate from a provider who doesn't offer that service.

But, as I said, there are ways to broach the subject without it coming off as offensive.

And I mean that sincerely. Providers are some of the most non-judgemental people on the planet, thank goodness! Thay have heard it all and then some! Many, many of their sessions end up being oral only. Read the reviews to find that out.

Sometimes the guy doesnt always intend it that way but when a beautiful is going down on you, sometimes its awfully difficult to make her stop! Condoms suck. Many guys cant stand them. They can be mood killers and can interfere with the pleasure at times. And remember, you are the client and most ladies want you to have a good time with want YOU want to do. So dont sweat it. Enjoy it!

CS, you have several people disagreeing with you on your post, and you keep coming up to defend it by talking about or alluding to the times that you have been successful, saying things like "maybe I am just good at it".

If you are good at it, great, good for you. I assume that part of the reason is that you have a lot of experience. The newbie that you are giving advice to doesn't. I wonder if these girls you are negotiating with are first time visits, and girls who have no knowledge of who you are, your references or board presence(s)? If so, again, good for you. The newbie once again is talking about a woman he has never seen, and he has no board presence and probably limited or no references. While clearly there are some women who will agree to the proposition, there are an equal number of women who will shut you off and never respond to you again, as Julia has stated. You may be very willing to risk that, I bet a newbie who is trying to establish himself isn't.

And finally, of course some people discuss rates and services and so on. That doesn't mean that it's a good idea; some people have intercourse without a condom, that doesn't mean we should be recommending it on a rookie board. I submit that any provider who says I will do (service) for (rate) in an e-mail with an unknown, new client is an idiot.


I don't disagree with much of what you said, and yet I think that it is terrible advice to give to a newbie, and that is what this board is all about.

I appreciate all your replies.
To clarify: I was not intending to negotiate a different fee. I know the hourly rate is what it is. My point was that I only ever want is GFE & BJ, but I will choose FS simply because I want to maximize what I paid for.

I understand that this is not unusual. Thanks.

I'm just saying that it's possible to do it, even if many of you think it isn't.  Much of what is possible out there is a result of your delivery.

I'm not even gonna comment on this anymore, because it's gonna fall on deaf ears.

Carry on.