my spouse just found some of my lower security hygiene items related to me hobby activities (my hair removal cream and my enema kit).   The phone, leather gear, condoms, and other toys are still secure in a briefcase in my car, but I need some ideas.  I have been at this 3 years and this is my first security breach but it has me rattled.  One thought comes to mind is a locking tool box for my car.  A tool box with a lift out tray where I could keep some tools in the top part and my toys in the bottom.  I definitely need something that locks, cause she was snooping when she found this stuff.  Any other ideas or suggestions would be welcome.

want to keep them in your car, how about where the spare tire is kept?

Seriously, is there a better place, in all of Terra (Earth) to hide your toys than in your gym locker?

"Hun, why do you have body wash and a hair brush hidden?"

"Because I stink when I finish at the gym!  Gotta take a shower and since I'm there, I may as well shave, deoderize (insert hygiene function here.)"

Not to mention, I've had breath mints, toothpaste, floss, electric razor and mouthwash in my car for years, so that's a repetitiously good way to conceal what I am doing with that too. (Hey, you spend your 2 minutes at the red light your way, as for me, I'm flossing or brushing there, kay?  kay.)

I have heard that some guys get a gym membership with locker rental.
They store items in the locker.
They also use "going to the gym" as a reason for their absence.

Oh, and his and hers cars work sometimes too.

"Why do you have a bottle opener in your car?"  

"Uh....cause there are specialty drinks that come corked, yea!"

Okay, maybe it doesn't work as well...

I have a small camera bag that travels with me, my meds & such.  I also have it's twin that is stashed in a locked drawer in my workshop.  But if anyone would see me with the bag, it would not arrouse suspicion (unless both were visible at once).  

Other family members can prettily easily access your vehicle...  yet there might be hiding places.  Mine has velcro holding carpet in the trunk sides...  removes to change light bulbs.  Back seats sometimes pull out.  

If a family member is looking...  then they are suspicious, probably for cause.   Vary your schedule but watch your back.  Might be time to cut back or take a brake.  When I started this hobby...  I promised myself I'd not do anything "stupid".  As I've learned here, I was not as careful as I should have been and "luck" is not a plan!   I have continually acted to upgrade my security.

Now that you're under scrutiny, Watch for computer trackers.  GPS memory.  EZ Pass records, innocent credit card purchases...  in places you should not be.      
Best Wishes,
skb

Shuda, I was being sarcastic about the POV (personally owned vehicle) idea.  We really need a sarcasm font!

Anyway, if you're under scrutiny, just go cold turkey for a few months.  Odds are, she'll stop.

Password protect your computer (duh, it should be anyway) and dont give her the password.  You're not using a SHARED computer, I hope...that wouldn't be the wisest idea.  

Better yet, I have a mini-laptop, works GREAT.  I have it locked so it needs a USB drive to boot and she's none the wiser (she think's its broken and I've been too lazy/busy to either fix it or get it fixed.  Eh, figure I got another 3, 4 years before I have to do something! lol)

Many Swiss army knife models have both a bottle opener and a corkscrew.
Both can be quite handy to have sometimes.

Some "Leatherman" tools have them as well. Plenty of "reasons" to have either one.

I haven't seen any models with nipple clamps or leather restraints (the same original question is also on the BDSM board).

In some climates in-car storage might be an issue for some toys because of temperature extremes.

I'd have better luck sneaking a hooker into bed next to the wife than using a gym locker as an excuse.  The day I sign up for a gym membership is the day she hires a P.I. to follow my ass.

LOL!  Yea, it can be that way for some guys....maybe join a club like a golf club or something would work too.  IF you're more of a sedentary guy, a cigar club might work.  Many of the guys in mine do not even smoke cigars or cigarettes or anything actually, we just like the opulence and the fact women are not allowed past the entrance.

Secure lockers there too.

Or, get a PO Box and leave your stuff there.

Or, get a safety deposit box and kill two birds with one stone.  The cash to pay for the service and the toiletries you need to clean up after the service?

I carry a leatherman, personally.  However there are a couple issues.

1)  The tool is nice, but not really great at its job.  But it does work in a pinch.

2)  I dislike carrying weapons on a first date.  Sure, it might be a good idea to have something, but it feels wrong.

I keep all my hobby related items safely stored in a large gun safe. It also holds my firearm collection, important papers (title to the houses, cars, boats, life insurance, etc.), and a stash of emergency cash. The beauty is that the safe has a legit purpose, but my wife does not have the combo. If you don't keep firearms, a smaller safe will do, and really almost anyone should have one to keep important documents safe in the event of a fire or break in.

yet it's poor place to store condums (heat in summer).  I like to carry a 3 pack of my favorite style just in case.  (I once had a Fav lady call me...  I had a long drive & was already on the road...  and ask me to pick some up.  Well, I had to get off the highway & hunt up a drug store in a strange community, then was late.)  So now I bring a fresh sealed 3 pack...  leave the excess.  I respect her right to refuse to use condoms I bring but I've never had it happen.  

Even though we don't normally share cars, she could certainly access.  

I bought her her own computer since she's into digital photography...  the old computer was running out of memory (I've since secretly upgraded it).  

A hiding place has to be adapted to your circumstances.  

Best wishes,
skb

I have to admit that I wasn't even thinking of the weapon aspect and the potential for a panic inducing moment. Definitely not the tool for a first date.

The only time I've pulled out my knife to open a beverage when I was with a provider there was already a high level of trust and multiple previous visits. In that specific situation, it was nowhere remotely close to being a problem.