Newbie - FAQ

Is this a red flag?
CougarLingus 1443 reads
posted

Hey everybody, I've only been on 411 a few months and have some questions about the finer details of operations there.

I see a lot of women asking for first contact to be through email and/or the little forms on their sites rather than through 411, and they ask you to include your 411 client ID. Some of these providers aren't on 411, as far as I can tell. So, now I've got a provider who isn't on there, or possibly is there under a different name than any I've been able to find for her, and she wants me to give her my client ID. Is that shady? That feels to me like it COULD be kinda shady.

I'm sure the vast majority of them have good intentions and have some way to verify what I tell them, that's not really my question. I'm just asking if any of you think it's a red flag that someone wants my 411 info when they're either not even on there, or they're hiding the fact that they are.

Another issue is that 411 asks the clients in no uncertain terms to only give out your ID info through the site. So far, that's how I've always done it. I've never emailed it to anyone because of that. There's been a few providers that asked for it by email on their site, but I just sent an appointment request instead; so far no blowback for that.  

So, do any of y'all email, text, etc, your info to providers who are active there? To me this is a different question than when you can't find them there. It's just the issue of the women asking to go off site, and admin asking us not to do that.

Thoughts?

GaGambler145 reads

P-411 provides "one stop shopping" where you can not only find a provider, find her reviews (on all sites, not just TER) AND deal with both screening and setting up an appointment without ever having to leave the site. If a provider wants me to contact her outside of the P 411 system, yet asks me for my P 411 info, yes that would send up a red flag to me.

 
Not only would it send up a red flag, but it also means she expects me to do "more work" in order to see her and that too is a deal breaker for me.  What it shows me is that she values her own time more highly than she values mine and as the consumer that's a deal breaker for me. I spent good money becoming a P 411 member, I spent a hell of a lot more money accumulating dozens of okays, if that's not good enough well then I will respect her "rules" but I will take my business elsewhere.

If she is on 411, I use their appointment request mechanism and nothing else. If more is asked, I politely move on (there was one exception, sadly she cancelled her visit to my town - never did that again).  

There are lots of fish in the sea...

Oh and by the way, I would rather not test Gina’s patience by breaking their rules.

Another rule that I have learnt at my own personal cost: no deposits, ever!

I ran into this situation once or twice while familiarizing myself with P411.  One provider, who I'll categorize as BSC, chastised and accused me of being dishonest because I initially contacted her from a different email than one that was linked to my P411.  Long story short, my acct. got disabled and I was contacted by Gina and explained the situation.  Another was with a well reviewed provider that required access to your soul in order to schedule with her, neither was turned out well.  Now I subscribe to the notion that if P411 doesn't secure me the date then the date isn't worth securing.  As a provider if  you have alternative and more in-depth methods of screening, then that is something that needs to be clarified upfront to save both parties the headache.  Just my 2 cents.

My hobby email doesn't work with P411.  I don't know what the issue is, but it is what it is and Gina is well aware of it (it affects everyone who uses that email provider).  So I have to use a different email as my official P411 email, and whenever I send a request through P411 to see a provider I ask them to please use my hobby email vs the one on my P411 account.  No one's ever had a problem with that.

So if a provider chastised me and accused me of being dishonest because I contacted her from my hobby email account, not the one on my P411 account, I'd likely strike that provider off my list and move on.  I don't need to meet anyone who's that unreasonable.  

There are many reasons that a provider not on P411 would still want your P411 ID.

 
She may have a friend who  is on P411 and that person will look up your account to get screening information. I am not say this is right but I am sure it probably happen. She may have been banned from P411 in past, I have no idea.

 There is nothing that wrong you would see a provider not on P411, just be prepared for different screening.  

 
Christine

GaGambler136 reads

If a provider is going to "game the system" whether that system is the P 411 system, the review system or whatever, It indicates to me that the woman in question has a shady side to her. IOW if she will cheat P 411, why should I trust her not to cheat me?

 
I don't have any problem (except for the convenience factor) with seeing non P 411 providers, but I don't like dishonest people in general, and I don't give my money to providers who's very first act before even meeting me is dishonest in nature. Both of your possible explanations for her behavior are the actions of a dishonest woman, that in and of itself would be enough to cross her off my list.

Gag,

I agree and think same. But it is a valid reason while its not a good reason.

 
I have only been in US since May full time but I have learn a few very important facts. One of those is that trying to guess what a provider or a client has as a motivation is impossible. Too many fucked up providers and too many fucked up companions. Trying to guess why they fucked up is impossible.  

 
As a side note, many just plain stupid. I cannot tell you how many contact me direct through email yet have P411. That is why include in my form to give me the ID if they have. Makes no sense to me that they did not go direct through P411, but trying figure out fucking stupid is difficult and so I dont try now.  

 
On other hand maybe i am just BSC by doing what I do. Maybe fucked up is eye of beholder? It is impossible for me to understand what the thoughts of others are or the motivations.  

 
Christine

GaGambler136 reads

Except for the catch all excuse of being stupid I honestly don't know why a guy would complicate his life by not using the tools he has paid for by simply contacting P 411 providers via P 411.  

 
I suppose if a hooker excluded all stupid johns, or a john excluded all stupid hookers, none of us would be getting much action. lol

 
I will reiterate my earlier point however, if a provider has been thrown off of P 411, or TER for that matter, OR if she is trying to circumvent the rules because she is too cheap or too lazy to Join P 411 herself, I would steer clear of such a provider personally.  I don't insist the providers I see join P 411, It is the first (and usually the last) place I look when setting a P4P date, but if for example I found a lady on TER who was not a P 411 member, I wouldn't demand she join just for my convenience before seeing her. I am already out, I would just give her my handle and she could find almost everything right down to my blood type if she were to look hard enough. lol

Register Now!