I want to try hiring an escort for the first time, and I was wondering if anyone has suggestions for how to request that anything that happens be safe. I would like DFK, but not BBBJ or unprotected DATY. Most of the providers seem to offer BBBJ and DATY, and most of the reviews I read seem to talk about both those things, so I might also be a little worried it's a little bit of an unusual request, even though I feel like it should be good from a provider's perspective.

How can you say that early on while being sufficiently subtle?

I do enjoy DATY, but the one time I tried to give it with protection, I'm told it wasn't very good. I suppose maybe the best plan with respect to that would be to come prepared, and ask the provider what she would like?

I value safety very highly.

That doesn't imply any sexual activity per se, but I think most gals will get the message.

In any case, when at the session, you can make your desires clear, and insist on everything covered

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You may want to stick with providers who ONLY offer CBJ (no BBBJ) as to avoid any potentially awkward moments.

If you do choose a provider who does BBBJ: Only ask in person, once you've gotten the preliminaries out of the way and are starting to feel comfortable.  I highly recommend waiting until physical contact has gotten underway and simply be direct.  
As soon as she starts heading south, just ask, "Is it ok if we use a cover for that?"  She may say no, so be willing to accept either no BJ or BBBJ in that event.   If you're looking at it just from the point of view of what's safest, then yes, CBJ is good from anyone's perspective.  But as a provider, I will tell you that I HATE the taste of condoms.  The little tip thingy tends to tickle the back of my throat and make me gag, too.  So although I will do CBJ when requested, I don't like it.  It's fine for you to ask, and I wouldn't object, but my enthusiasm may be noticeably diminished.  :-P

Oh, and some providers use condoms with spermicidal lubricant; I can tell you from experience that there are very few worse-tasting things than spermicide.  Tough to get that taste out of your mouth, too.  
  If it were me, and someone said, "I brought protection for DATY; what would you like?"  my response would be, "Whatever makes YOU feel comfortable!".    
I've had someone bring a dental dam to use exactly once. He didn't ask or mention it at all: he pulled it out, removed the wrapper, and proceeded to use it.   Yes, it dulled the sensation.  And to be honest, it made me feel a little awkward.  That may just be me, though.  
But again, if you want to use it, just say so.  If she doesn't want you to use one, for whatever reason, then be prepared to do it sans-protection or forgo it.  

 
Hope that helps!!
xoxoxoxoxo

Providers won't mind if you request that you use protection.

I hope others will clarify Female Condoms, too.  It's actually a field in the TER Profile now.  Is FC better for DATY than dental dam?  

Of course, FC does not apply to CBJ.  CBJ would still require more conventional male condoms

If you want it all covered, DATY included, that is up to you and I have no issue with it.

....and goes where I think it would go, it would have no impact on safe DATY for either party.
Safe DATY requires a dental dam (or something similar).

I think a dental dam or saran wrap would work better.

On a molecular level, a piece of Saran wrap would look like a tennis net to a BB.

Stick with medical grade barriers

But there is info out there.

Of all the pics, I didn't see a real photo like yours, "in use".  

In some of the pics, FC are clear material (polyurethane) but some are not clear and might be nitrile or latex (male condom material).  I wasn't sure if there was enough on the outside to provide a good overlapping area for overlapping  

According to comments on the boards, the material is very thin (but strong) and allows for better sensations, almost as if nothing was there.  

How about this idea for those who have actually used FC: Take an FC and cut it open* to make a large flat rectangular membrane, like a dental dam, and cover the Y without any vaginal insertion.  Would that work?  Is the FC material that much superior to dental dam (latex or nitrile, but made thick enough for dental use, not necessarily for DATY use)?

 
* According to the verbiage and pictures, cut off the bottom and top rings and now you have an open cylinder.  Cut the cylinder along its length, unfold it and it's now a rectangle or some other quadrilateral if the top and bottom are different sizes.  For those of you taking this course for credit, there will be a quiz next DATYday

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No BJ would be fine with me. I would prefer a provider who only does CBJ, but there aren't many options for that in my area, and I'm just a lot more interested in some of the BBBJ providers I've read about.

I would bring an activity-appropriate cover just in case, because yeah, spermicide would be disgusting.

As for DATY, thanks for sharing your experience with that! I think I'll come prepared, ask what she thinks, and base my decision on her reaction. It would be fun to, so long as it doesn't seem like she thinks it's odd.

Would be interesting to know, but in some respects I actually prefer to use a male cover anyway. I tend towards being too sensitive, and they can help with that. Plus, a FC just seems like a strange idea to me. More of a hassle.

eom

What is the fun in that? I respect your preferences, but I will not see a provider who only does CBJ or who want allow DATY. Bare mouth to genital contact is the next best thing to bare back sex.  

BTW, DATY with a female condom is a waste of time for both of you.

And if he wanted to use a dental damn it would not be a waste of time for me....I am delivering a service and my needs do not come first.  

Seriously, it would be like you not liking carrots and having someone tell you, you don't know what you're missing...actually you do know, something you know you don't like.

The OP is most likely very comfortable with uncovered acts with a real life girlfriend, just not in the game. I find it amazing that others feel the need to push their likes and even their dislikes on others.  

I know you said you respect his preferences but everything you said after kind of negates that as far as he is concerned or is your personal choice and nothing to do with his.

I certainly know what BBBJ and DATY are like. I've had girlfriends, and I'm married. (My wife decided to give this her blessing.)

Obviously to me, BBBJ isn't as big a deal as it is for you. Even so, you're right that the experience won't be as nice as it could be. That's a sacrifice I'll gladly make to prevent the outside chance of having any new, unpleasant experiences, and potentially inflicting them on my wife too.

this board is supposed to help you get your questions answered in an environment free of judgment. NOT a place for people to tell you what you should like or dislike.

As H+T said, don't worry about what the ladies "prefer" you are paying for a service, not "making love" If this is what you want, you shouldn't have any problems finding it.

Coming prepared is a plus but if you want to be fully protected let her know. Don't risk each other health.