Hi,
I made an appointment with a sweet provider for a 3 hour meeting.  she screened me through work as I had no references. There were reviews on TER so I wasn't worried about LE or a scam.  My only concern was that I asked if we could meet at a public spot (part of my plan was to be picked up by a beautiful woman in a bar) and after a few emails it was clear that it was not an option.  putting aside my pick up fantasy, I had no reason to be concerned and I could have just gone to her apartment.  instead, I called a few hours before the date and cancelled.  she texted me back and told me she saw my emails. she asked if I was sure about my decision.  I feel incredibly guilty because I'm sure I cancelled partly be seen I was nervous.
I justified it by convincing myself that I wanted to meet in public and the lack of a clear reason as to why she just gave me her address was enough for me to cancel.  How can I make it up to her?  She hasn't asked for a thing but I was wrong. I know it was an immature and selfish thing to do. I expect to be chastised, but after criticizing me, please give me an idea of how to make it right.

Thanks

I wouldn't worry about it.

Just make a new appointment.

She wont care about you being nervous.

Not Cool.  

A Provider who is willing to see New Clients expects to have them show up on time. I don't understand why New Clients make appointments then either cancel or don't show up at all. Unfortunately this happens to the current Provider I'm seeing. New Clients always cancel out on her. And she's pretty nice and gives a great session.

1) Try to keep the drama down to a minimum - don't write some long gushing email about how sorry you are and how you want to make it up to her.  I think drama is a turn-off and a potential red flag to ladies. (and you've already interjected enough drama by cancelling so late any way)

2) Simply state that you are sorry for cancelling and that if she would be willing to allow it, you'd love to try again - and suggest a date and time.

3) If she says no or doesn't reply - just consider it a lesson learned and move on without a second thought.  She will have moved on and wouldn't be obsessing about you.  In this hobby, you learn lessons as you go, and two key things to remember are: I) Don't take things personally, and II) Move On.

Oh, one last thing, just keep things simple on a first date.  You will have enough fun meeting a sexy lady for the first time on her terms.  If you hit it off, then for subsequent dates you can discuss with her more of your role play desires, and she'll be more likely to accommodate.

The pickup scenerio you wanted would have required her to get dressed & possibly make up which is additional time out of her available time.  To be fair, you 3 hour would have covered time for such a role-play but not evfery gal is into role play.  
3 hours is unusually long for a first meeting.  I've never done 3 hours on the clock in a single session.  I had a gal I used to bring lunch fixings in to her appt...  we'd play house & have an hour of play time OTC.  
When I started, I book 1 1/2 hours because I didn't like to rush...  eventually a gal suggested a single hour was timie enough & it was.  
3 hours of continous play would leave the girl exhaused.  

I think I'd book a Hour or Hour & half of play time.  She may put you on her DNS (Do Not See) list for canceling but you did calncel, NOT No Show which is worse.    

Forget about making it up to her.  She doesn't care.  What she'll care about is if you make an appointment, you show up, are clean & respectful, don't fall in love with her, and leave when the appointment is over.  

When you are really ready, get over your nerves & book an appointment.  An appology should be the briefest...  "Sorry about my nerves got the better of me" & don't mention it again.

when a lady gets cancelled on at the last minute, she cares, but strictly in the business sense - which you certainly make the case for in your post.  She is not obsessing about the guy and WHY he cancelled really.  Some guys, ESPECIALLY true newbies and perhaps very low volume hobbiests look at this more personally.  If one of these gents has been staring at the pics of lovely lady for weeks or even months - lets just say a visitor who doesn't come around often - and he gets cancelled on at the last moment or experiences a NCNS - I guarantee you will remember that for a long time.  A lady may be pissed and put a guy on her personal DNS list, but then she will move on.  Let me put it this way, for a newbie, it can be a financial AND emotional investment - much like if you planned a vacation to a special spot for months down to the last detail, only to have it pulled-out from under you at the last minute.  Kinda sucks (even if you do get most of your money back).

Obviously as guys do this more, they learn not to take things personally or invest too much thought in any one specific lady.  "Move on" becomes the mantra.  And that's better for both parties of course, because this is a business.  But it's not necessarily that way at first.  Early last year when I was "just getting started" in this hobby, I had a visitor cancel on me for a very lame reason at the last minute (and it was her last day in town).  It sucked, but definitely toughened me up!

She seems like a VERY nice lady not to be getting bent out of shape over having half a day wasted by the OP.

I find myself more inclined to agree with JLS here. Yes, the OP owes her "something" and it appears that exactly what he owes is what he is trying to figure out. Which speaks highly of his ethics IMO.

My suggestion is similar to Julias. If she will let you, book another appointment, SHOW UP this time, and give her an extra couple of hundred bucks without making a huge deal out of it for her inconvenience on your last attempt at a date.

You might make mention that you are a newb and that nerves got the best of you, the extra couple of bucks will prove to her that you feel bad about it. If of course she agrees to see you again. She would be well within her rights to put you on her personal DNS list.

I'm surprised that no one has commented on the fact that she is really the one in control of the situation. She apparently has his real name and work information, and could certainly follow up and ask for compensation if she wanted to. Although I have been tempted when it looked like the only way to make a date happen, I have never given out that information and don't intend to. It just doesn't seem worth the risk.

I want to thank everyone who took the time to read my post and give their feedback.  my intention is to attempt to contact this lady and if she will reply, I will extend an olive branch and make a mends. if not, I will accept it as a lesson learned. I was very interested in the comments regarding my fantasy date.  next time I will keep it simple.
thanks again.

and low volume of some guys. If a guy is doing this only once every 2 months or so and plans his dates carefully (with visitors schedules etc.), then it is a little more disappointing for him to miss an opportunity with a lady than some experienced guy with hundreds of dates under his belt who does this twice a week.  Thus my analogy to the dissappointment in having to cancel a vacation that you were looking forward to.  Nothing to do with falling for a lady or anything like that.

I just wanted to communicate the idea that it can really suck to get cancelled on for guys too.  It's not always just perceived as missing a chance to get laid - that's all.  But we all learn and evolve.  A guy just getting started - especially if relatively sexually inexperienced - will be quite different 2 years and 50 dates latter in how he approaches things and reacts to situations, just like a lady will evolve and likely react differently to situations after 10 years of experience than she did in her first paid dates.

And yeah, I'm on board with the "light heart and drama-free" approach too...