I've been married for a long time. I have children. I love my wife and have no intention of leaving her. But with every passing year I felt I was missing out on a part of life, having sex with beautiful women. It began to drive me towards thoughts of divorce. Then I realized that the marriage was good, the sex was good and I only needed some variety.
I think a lot of men divorce just to fill the need for variety. They're throwing away perfectly good marriages just for that one need. Once I began seeing providers all my inner conflict disappeared and I knew I could stay married for life. I don't even hobby very often. Just enough to drive away the feeling that life is passing me by.
For the self-righteous who would flame me for being a hypocrite and a selfish prick, save your keystrokes. I already know this to be true. I have no excuses or rationalizations. I am what I am.
Astucious
I've been out of action for a while, longer than most could imagine. Just the way it's been.
Anyway, I'm not entirely sure that hobbying is for me. As crazy as it sounds, even though I'd like to think I know how I'd react if I met a provider, the truth is I'm not entirely sure.
I know some might say you'll never know until you try, but still, I do know that if given the choice between seeing the hottest provider I could, and having a good-looking girlfriend, I would choose the latter. And if I did, I wouldn't be on TER.
So it's possible I already have my answer.
But just out of curiosity, how did you know hobbying was right for you?
I have zero guilt !
Limited sex in my marriage for a prolonged time. It got to the point I was seriously thinking about soliciting a "friends with benefits" relationship with a long time friend. I realized how risky and difficult that would be to pull off. Then the light bulb went on about what a perfect alternative the hobby would represent. I haven't looked back since.
I agree with what my esteemed colleagues have just posted. A complete and prolonged lack of sex in my marriage was what drove me to this hobby. I will never forget the day that my S/O told me that she just didnt think of me that way any longer. Then years later she bemoans the fact that something is missing from her life. No kidding !!!
I am now enjoying far better sex than I ever got from her. The wonderful Asian girls in LA are ready to rock your world & they do it with a smile on their face. What more can you want??
My wife is 55 soon to be 56. She told me she was about 70 per cent to the point of no interest in sex. Hormone level is gone. No snuggling or cuddling. Very little touching. The point comes when a man has to choose. I still have raging hard ons, love women and I am in shape. When a man can't fuck the one your with then fuck the one who will. Since I started the hobby I have a few notches on my belt, I have no guilt. I am supportive to my marriage thru money and supportive companionship. Its over 30 years with the same woman. She is on a need to know basis and she doesn't need to know...... I am not going to divorce, I still like being married. I wouldn't be hobbying if things hadn't changed due to menopause....
I do not get these women. just because they don't want sex... humans need to be hugged and cuddled. No wonder I make so much money
I never feel bad about the 'betrayal' I am a part of with these wives that do that to their men.
Combination of things: VERY infrequent and limited sex in my marriage and the fact that the "marriage experience" became vastly different than the "girlfriend experience". After 18 years of marriage I had an itch for the girlfriend experience, so hobbying was the best solution.
I kept hoping that I would grow out of it.
I did finally get married and gave it up for a few years until the (now ex) wife started to cut me off of sex; so I went back to what I knew best and haven't looked back since.
After my second divorce and I tried dating again without any real committment to getting involved
in another relationship. The hobby allows me to fufil my sexual desires in a honest way...instead of meeting women under the guise of being in a relationship just to fufil these desires.
Have you questioned/confronted your wife with WHY she is not providing sex anymore? What is her response?
It doesn't make sense. A marriage should include sex and intimacy and friendship. Why would the wife want to stay in a sexless marriage, anymore than the husband?
Are this many women having medical issues that eliminate desire? Are they all bitter at their husbands?
Yep, a marriage should include those. Not all due. Some may have medical roots, some not. Reality is that if a wife that has lost her desire for sex (not just desire for her husband), regardless of the reason, she is even more motivated to keep the marriage, especially if love, friendship, family still exist. Seems a lot of providers are divorced from men that did not appreciate thier sexuality. Myself I don't get it. Myself I don't get a hobbyist that still has a great sex life with thier wife (like a good friend of mine). If marriage we all based on couples having equal sex drives, it would all balance out. But both sides have extreme cases of sex drive levels and everything in between. But marriage is not just about sex.
SO has no interest in sex. Only tollerates it if she can't think of an excuse. Too hot, too cold, too tired (finds activities to be tired).
I realized that there are things in my bucket list that will never happen unless I take action. I don't hobby a lot... average once a month... but I love every minute of it. If something happened tomorrow & I could no longer be sexually active, I have memories that will bring me a smile every time.
Looking back, I realize I would have been much better off hobbying than marrying my first wife (now my EX). I regret not considering it at the time. I remain with current.
skb
I love her and the children she has provided me with, and I'll always take care of her. We had a wonderful sex life until her health changed. I never hobby in my hometown, let alone my home state. Only do so when I'm gone for business. I find this to be the best solution to my desire to have sex. No strings attached, no drama and the up most discretion to protect my wife.
well, all things good to concider, yet this may be the "girlfriend experience" its actually very different.
The type of date you set up with a certain Lady can weigh heavily into how much you get out of your experiences. Sometimes its not always the "hottest" lady who gives you the biggest thrills. When you read the reviews looking for the one you think will take you to your utopia,read between the lines, see who seems to deliver a more intune experience to what is what you desire.
Maybe a longer date a dinner date lets say, may be what feels more like what you are looking for. Personality and chemistry plays a huge role in these encounters. Just put a lot of thought into what it is you are looking for. And no this isn't for everyone, just like everyone doesn't ski and so on.
Now from my perspective, what brought me here, I started as a private companion and had sworn off relationships for a while. I met many wonderful men and that was what made me take the leap into seeing more clients. Not that you were asking the ladies, but anyway. The thing about this business, it is what you make of it. Theres no set standard for what a GFE encounter is. It can be as indepth as you want it. Its all in fun and the possabilities, as well as variety is endless....Good luck and play safe.
Nicole
Will let you know when I figure that out! LOL If you are into "just sex" or the type that likes a variety regardless of any significant other you may have, my impression is that it works well for most guys. Myself, based on my personal life circumstance and how I am as a person, I don't know if it is a great solution or the biggest mistake of my life. Still working on that. I just don't happen to be in a situation where it would be real fair to get a civilian involved. I don't know if anyone here can help you with that. If you are OK with emotionally detached, but great, sex it should be OK for you. Anything beyond that seems to get complex. Good luck. I will say if you do go for it, get a highly reviewed TER gal if you can, all have been wonderful with me so far.
No longer wanted the hassle of dating, but still wanted sex with pretty women. So, it just came naturally to me. I was very nervous at first, but not anymore though I do get a little nervous when seeing a lady for the first time.
I now get all the sex, well maybe not all, that I want from lovely ladies. I have been divorced for over 23 years, enjoy my single life, and have no intentions of ever getting married again. I don't even date.
I have lots of fave ladies that seem to enjoy my company (yeah, I know, they enjoy my envelopes), but I don't have to spend many dates waiting to get naked with a pretty woman, they will do it on the first date. LOL
Swim
Well, my reason is that I just do not have the time, energy or desire to develop a standard relationship. I have too much going on in my life to want to deal with a time consuming endeavor.
Although I have not "pulled the trigger yet", I have done my research and found a provider who I believe is right for me. She is not the most beautiful or the most expensive but after reading her reviews I was sold on her for many reasons.
I do not know how I will react either but how bad can it be to be with a beautiful woman whose goal is to make you happy in every sense of the word?
I believe my choice is a good one by not only reading but contacting the reviewers. Just remember, take the reviews with a grain of salt. Sometimes, I believe, it is the reviewers fault and not the providers for a substandard rating. Do you homework and good luck. My first date is still over a week away.
I've been married for a long time. I have children. I love my wife and have no intention of leaving her. But with every passing year I felt I was missing out on a part of life, having sex with beautiful women. It began to drive me towards thoughts of divorce. Then I realized that the marriage was good, the sex was good and I only needed some variety.
I think a lot of men divorce just to fill the need for variety. They're throwing away perfectly good marriages just for that one need. Once I began seeing providers all my inner conflict disappeared and I knew I could stay married for life. I don't even hobby very often. Just enough to drive away the feeling that life is passing me by.
For the self-righteous who would flame me for being a hypocrite and a selfish prick, save your keystrokes. I already know this to be true. I have no excuses or rationalizations. I am what I am.
Astucious
with all the variety you want can't be beat.