Giving the lady a male equivalent name, for example: London Rayne would be Larry Rains - the problem is remembering and doesn't work if the lady sends you a "hi hon" message or a pic of her derrière lol
It seems like getting a phone that is not tied to you is a good idea, when seeing girls. But doesnt that mean you cant use your real name at anytime. Seems to me like you would have to create a fake persona to protect yourself as well. Then who would you get screened to see anyone to begin in the first place.
But, yes, you should get a burn phone that is registered anonymously and topped up with cash, not a credit card associated with your real name.
And never give your real name for screening purposes, especially to an agency but really to anyone. You have no idea if they will really discard it. Then if their device falls into LE hands they'll easily find you.
Girls, of course, have an absolute right to ask for any info they want to screen you. But most mongers agree your full, real name should never be given. Or any other real info. Smart girls can sometimes find ways to get it anyway.
Bottom line: if she won't see you because of this, move on.
-- Modified on 8/2/2013 7:51:55 AM
I use my Regular Phone for both Hobbying and Personal Calls. I'm not Married so I have nothing to worry about in terms of getting caught.
I'm like you Rog, I'm single and have no sig other. However, for married or attached guys, I do agree an anonymous hobby phone is a very good thing to have.
Swim
I speak as a married hobbyist. For me, it would be harder to conceal an extra phone. I would have no idea where to stash it that it would be CERTAIN to not be discovered. I could not have a believable cover story for that.
I do not have a hobby phone. But I have a carefully crafted set of circumstances.
- I specifically set up to NOT get a monthly statement from the cell phone company.
- I am on a unlimited voice and text plan so there would be no "overages" to raise suspicion.
- I am anal retentive about deleting calls and texts from my logs. ONE slip up on this can end your hobbying days and possibly stick you with large lawyer bills. You have to delete the individual calls/txts as just deleting the whole history is suspicious behavior.
- I also use my phone for work. I have my desk phone forwarded to my cell when I am out of the office, so I can explain away calls from unknown numbers. I had this happen last week. I took Friday off, but earlier in the week had put in the screening form for a provider that she could call weekdays between 8am and 6pm. Well she called on Friday when I was home...I simply said "I'm not in the office today, can I call you back on Monday?" Wife asked "who was that?" and I replied "just a business call...I told them I was off today and would talk to them on Monday." A cover story like that I can carry off because it is true...it was just a business call.
Ultimately you need to decide what works for you. And you need to "roleplay" possible scenarios and have your cover story ready for them
Stashing the phone away from prying eyes is always a very necessary, and also difficult, thing to determine. Sometimes, as in your case, it's just not possible, without being extremely creative. The paperless statement is also a good idea. Many guys don't have the situation you have with your job to make cover stories easier to make up.
You are right in your last paragraph, it's up to each individual to determine what would work for them. All we can do is offer them pointers and alternatives.
Swim
had a lady text me when I was in the shower and my phone was on the kitchen counter. It was a huge mistake, the message showed on the front even though the phone was locked. I explained it to my wife but still a huge risk.
This was just on the MN board about blackmailing using phone numbers
BP ad extortion
Legal board tells of a client who answered a fake BP ad, gave his telephone number which is now posted on a john list which wants to charge him a fee to remove it.
The story is at the TER link below.
DO NOT CLICK on any link in the various posts in the thread.
Related Link: http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=20723&boardID=25&page=1#2072
Giving the lady a male equivalent name, for example: London Rayne would be Larry Rains - the problem is remembering and doesn't work if the lady sends you a "hi hon" message or a pic of her derrière lol
I had that covered she was losted as travis but the text was "had a great time last week, i ll be around the end of the month if you want to get together again".
It was a huge pain in the ass. Hobby phone now with it off and hidden in my den/home office. Velcro works great
I do not have a hobby phone. But I have a carefully crafted set of circumstances.
- I specifically set up to NOT get a monthly statement from the cell phone company.
- I am on a unlimited voice and text plan so there would be no "overages" to raise suspicion.
- I am anal retentive about deleting calls and texts from my logs. ONE slip up on this can end your hobbying days and possibly stick you with large lawyer bills. You have to delete the individual calls/txts as just deleting the whole history is suspicious behavior.
- I also use my phone for work. I have my desk phone forwarded to my cell when I am out of the office, so I can explain away calls from unknown numbers. I had this happen last week. I took Friday off, but earlier in the week had put in the screening form for a provider that she could call weekdays between 8am and 6pm. Well she called on Friday when I was home...I simply said "I'm not in the office today, can I call you back on Monday?" Wife asked "who was that?" and I replied "just a business call...I told them I was off today and would talk to them on Monday." A cover story like that I can carry off because it is true...it was just a business call.
Ultimately you need to decide what works for you. And you need to "roleplay" possible scenarios and have your cover story ready for them.
As it so happened, I'd had a couple of beers and fell asleep on the couch. My phone, however, is plugged in on my nightstand. The texts wake up my wife, who looks at the phone, storms out into the living room, and says "who the hell is this"? The ONLY thing that saved my ass is that I'd given the provider a fake name. So when my wife texted back a string of profanity, the provider said "I'm looking for (fake name), this isn't his number? So sorry."
Not sure my wife 100% believed me, but it COULD have been a wrong number, and in the end, that saved my ass.
The point of all this is simply: you can be as careful as you want. But if providers have your phone number, your real phone number, they might call or text at any time. If your wife EVER, for any reason, could have her hands on your phone, I'd rethink your strategy.
Get a burner phone or use Google Voice. Burner phones can be stashed at work, in a gym locker, buried in a trunk, etc., etc. Storing in the trunk works GREAT if you bought your car used. If it turns up some day, "huh -- must have belong to the last person, I guess" and in the trash it goes.
Easy to turn them off when not in use, and most can be set with a PIN code when you turn them on. Without the PIN code, no one can see your texts or call logs.
Google Voice is a great second option. Log in to the app to send or receive texts/calls. When you log out, call history is deleted. Without your Google password (use a secure one!) no one can get in. And if a provider gets stupid or aggressive, change your GVoice number. Problem solved.
ready for P4P, the hobby phone goes in my gym bag under stuff. After the date, it goes back in its regular hiding place.
I have heard of guys putting their hobby phone in a plastic bag and putting it under the spare tire in the trunk.
If the concern is that a lady's phone might fall into the wrong hands aren't you more at risk if your actual phone # is in her contacts/call log. Of course calling someone does not mean anything other than a phone call happened anyway, so real name or real phone number aside - there is no law against calling someone who can legally advertise in any phone book in this great land of ours... or giving them your name for that matter.
My regulars keep texting me & I have told them this is my hobby too. lol It really goes 2 ways here. I would prefer email only.
That is really crappy of them. If you told them "please don't text me" and they continue it is simple disrespect. But I understand your dilemma...walking the fine line between maintaining regular clients and keeping your hobby life and real life separate. I don't think most men realize that maintaining that separation is often as (if not more) important for the ladies as it is for them.
I am on my second burn phone after a couple years of hobbying. I got them for a few reasons.
I can discard them whenever I want and i can turn them off during the daytime when at work. I can't do that with my personal phone as I've had the number for almost a decade now and use it for work. All my friends/family/coworkers would obviously notice. And...with the transportability of numbers these days...not keeping your number looks suspect IMO.
I'm seeing a pseudo-UTR girl right now that is a lot of fun....but young. I'm not 100% sure about her practices. If things go south...I can ditch the phone and she won't have any way to track me down and harass me.
Also...I didn't want to take the risk of sending a "hobby" related text to the wrong contact on my personal phone. That might be hard to explain. I keep everything separate
I had to trash my hobby phone... some spammer got the darn number. I keep the hobby phone off & well hidden when not on a date. I clean the call logs before I go home. It means I must get Internet access if I can't recall a number but I can do that easier. When on a date, I swap the phone in my belt carrier so no one sees anyway.
I use my real first... seldom asked last...
You may or may not have to give real name to book dates...
A hobby phone is cheap protection. A hobby phone & a year of service for 100. That poor guy getting blackmailed will pay far more than that in legal fees & such. If you can afford to hobby, you can afford the phone.
Don't forget the hobby free email, not connected to your real email.
I knew of one guy... tried to set up a date... used an email his wife had access to. Wife kicked him out before he even got his FIRST provider date!! He was blaming & harassing the provider whose crime was to ANSWER his email.