On the phone setting up the date is different.  I would suggest maybe a couple phone calls to develop some good feelings and then ask.  I've had various talks about donations with the ladies I see.  Granted they all know me, but I've always seen before the date as different.  Just don't mentions specific acts unless you've deveoped a relationship.

I'll never discuss money. I am always amazed when I get a call about that. I usually ask if they like their donuts with chocolate sprinkles.
Oooo that pisses them off.