Hi, i've been lurking for quite some time now on TER and other websites like backpages. I'm from California, but i come to St. Louis every month or so for 2 weeks for work. I've always been interested in but not willing to take the first step as i don't know what the first step is and am too afraid i'll make a HUGE mistake.

I'm really looking for a very good, dependable GFE first impression that i can return to whenever i come back to St. Louis MO for work. It gets lonely a lot of times. I've been trying to read reviews to get a feel for who is good but with my basic membership, can't see much of anything. I've tried checking those reviewed the most, but most of them don't take newbies for their own safety, which i completely understand, i'm worried about my own safety too! Those that are reviewed only once im reluctant to try, and some i've googled the numbers and will get like red flags and what not (hence the fear).

I thought i might wet my feet first with yourgirlnextdoor, but the problem is my schedule is constantly in flux for work. I'm on call 24/7, so even making daily appointments can be hard to keep at times. So i've resorted to just chillin at the strip clubs, Hustler mainly and hoping i can pick up signs from any of the girls, but again, i don't know what to look for.

Any and all help is appreciated.

-- Modified on 6/21/2015 8:41:58 AM

Next step is to read the Self Help Manual that is linked on this page.  It has a lot of information that newbies should learn about both the hobby and how to use TER.

Your schedule issue is a problem.  Gals hate to be cancelled on last minute.  See what you can do about that.

Beyond that, post on the St. Louis board looking for newbie friendly providers.  Be prepared to have to give up lots of personal information in order to convince a provider to take a chance on you.  Also consider joining a screen agency like P411.  That will help a lot.  Also stick to well reviewed gals so as not to compromise your safety.

Finally, spend a lot of time reading posts on this board.  Many of your questions and concerned are brought up on here frequently

I hope this helps

Yeah, i realized that after having posted the message that maybe i should check the faq page.

As for schedule, i realized that may be an issue once i read a lot of the providers websites and having to make an appointment a day in advance at the least.

I  had another question i was wondering if you could help with. I read on one of the threads here about strippers vs escorts, and they mentioned something about the stripper making the "first move." What is the first move? How can you tell its a move and not just them flirting as part of their dance?

I have considered P411 as it seems the go to for screening agency, but the pricing for membership makes me a little... reluctant until i know i'd like to fully invest in this hobby.

 A one year membership in P411 is like a $100.   So the root of your problem is that you're too damned cheap.  If you're going to balk at $100, then you can't afford to do this.  

  Like you, I traveled to Missouri (Kansas City) not too long ago on business.  I'd never been there, knew no one there.  I didn't matter.  I logged in to P411, looked at the local providers, sent an e-mail to an attractive blonde.  She was in my hotel room the next day.  This is only hard when you make it hard.  --z

In the long run, escorts will costs you a lot less than a stripper when it comes to getting fucked. Learn to search the boards,  most of the questions you'll have concerning the hobby have been asked ad nauseum.

yall are right, if i can spend $100 on a stripper just to get blue balls, its not much more for this, thanks for the reality check.

A TER plus P411 account will do wonders. There's plenty of providers out there that are newbie friendly as long as you pass the P411 screening. Just make sure you have a great introduction contact with them. Yes it's a heavy up front cost, but in the long run this isn't a cheap hobby.

I just recently made an appointment with a provider via her screening website and after having read a lot of the posts in the help section, was prepared to send my DI blurred out and what not for further screening processes, but in the evening of the same day i received an email from her asking to confirm the meeting time for the next day. I was excited because I was thinking i'd have to jump through a lot of hoops to be fully screened (as i still havent gotten p411 yet) and as a complete newbie with no references, i didn't even think i'd get a response.

SO it got me thinking (and paranoid) that this was a bit too easy to get an appointment (as i've read the help and knew how many hoops i may have to jump through). I did some research on the provider, she has 24 reviews on here, not consistent reviews, few months where it went dark. She is P411 verified and i believe date-check verified, but to view her profile i guess i have to be a member, but she has the insignia on her website. I don't know, maybe being the first time, i'm more paranoid than i should be... but still, if its too good to be true... ya know the rest. Any advice?

-- Modified on 6/22/2015 12:00:09 PM

It's what everyone here is strongly advising you to do; so just do it already and save yourself alot of worry. Seriously, if you're travelling alot you know the monthly cost is about the same as one room service meal.  Stop nickel-and-dime-ing this; that's an attitude that can come across loudly to providers and it doesn't usually give a favorable impression.  Just sayin.

Just because a lady has dozens of reviews and a TER badge/link on her site does not mean she is the one to take a chance on your first time out of the gate.  Just this last week I was reading the reviews of a provider who has almost 100 reviews.... and every dang one of them was negative!  Not a rip-off negative, but the total misrepresentation, hot-mess kind of negative.

How to solicit a stripper or figure out the secret handshake of those who will do "more"?!
Dude, I was a stripper for over a decade and I can tell you that the hustlers will make the same moves and advances as the legit pros.  You just can't tell.    
You can mention casually that you were trying to find an escort but got cold feet and came to the club instead for at least some guaranteed naked viewing... and see if she takes the bait.   Again, you're still taking a big chance that she isn't out to hustle you and/or get you thrown out of (and possibly banned from) the club.  

Sorry, I'm not being quite as nice as usual but you really are coming across as trying to re-invent the wheel (and cheaply!) here.  

:-

A lot can change in a day, I do greatly understand your point on the VIP access, P411, date-check, ect as it is the safest and easiest way to screen someone, but im also thinking, since i've read stories of LE posing as providers here and other places for their stings and succeeding, so i'm thinking that it'd be easy for them to fake an account here, get p411 and ect using a relative or someone close they know, have fake reviews... how do i know just because you have these "badges" that you are a safe provider? I have no way of knowing. you know my real name, my job, potentially my drivers license number and my phone number, unless i have the time to get a burner and a fake id, ect, yet i dont know if your name is really your actual name. You're protecting yourself, but i need to protect myself as well.

First note on the strippers, i get that, given up on that point, that was merely a curiosity. I posted a bit ago that with the amount i've already spent at strip clubs, I can afford VIP access and P411 for awhile. I know quite a few "strippers" myself. They are in quotes because where i'm from, there are businesses that are technically not strip clubs because they dont have the proper licenses/permits, so the legality of the women stripping at these "bars" make it easier to do certain things and "figure out" the "handshake" easier. I was just curious about actual strip clubs, as when i talked to some of them, they mentioned a lot of strip clubs where they came from where its a downright brothel at times.

On the reviews, im hoping the non-VIP part of the story where most people are like "non-vip, definitely repeat, VIP, read on" is true and not just leading non-vip members on, but yes, they could lead with that just to troll non-VIP members.

I'm just in agreement with Tsuyoi where this hobby is definitely not cheap, but in my head, its like... paying to enter somwhere to buy more stuff, like paying an entry fee every time you go into a grocery market to buy grocery. I will not nickel and dime providers at all, but to pay a couple hundred just to see some reviews and maybe not commit in the end? i mean, i've committed now by making an appointment with a provider... I will follow through with the commitment unless i get a bad vibe when i enter the hotel, in which case i will cancel, but yeah... If this is a good first experience, ill take the final step.

I don't mean to come off as what you've mentioned, I guess i've just been lurking too long and built up these ideas that may or may not be plausible, we'll see.

Plus i read if i put two reviews up that i'll get VIP access... and if this appointment tonight goes well, i'll write a review and i'll have one more to go =] -- Modified on 6/22/2015 4:49:53 PM

-- Modified on 6/22/2015 5:00:12 PM

...you can cancel it before the first 30 days is up and it won't automatically renew. In 30 days you can do a lot of research.  

Your LE infiltration scenerio is expensive and time consuming for LE. Not saying it isn't possible but it's highly improbable. They could set up a BP sting and have a truck full of arrests before your scenerio yielded one arrest.

Believe me the general details are no where near all you need to make a decision.

You of course must decide what you're willing to do but you are seriously overthinking this.

Read the post I linked below for another way to get started. (Note I do recommend P411 even though I am not a member.)

Look, I get your nervousness, and it's always great to ask questions here if it's your first time. I was doing the same thing a few months back. Here's a few final thoughts, since it sounds like your first "outing" is going to be today!

Ultimately, no matter what you do, this hobby is risky. LE, STDs, bat-shit crazy providers, bait n switch, etc. It's up to you to determine just how much risk you want to assume to satisfy your desires. We can do a lot to minimize risk (only see very well reviewed providers, use common sense, use PROTECTION!!!!, etc) but it'll never be zero, and that's okay because nothing you do in life is without some risk. Just be smart, think with your upper head, and think/research everything through before you commit.

In terms of personal information/screening: it's very much YMMV, but I would rarely if ever give my real name to a provider, and pretty much NEVER a copy/image of my ID (at most I'll show it to them once we meet face to face). P411 would be your best bet, as it is a one time process, and only one agency has your info (which they supposedly destroy afterwards), instead of every provider you ever see. After that you can start with providers listed as P411 only (not P411+2 or w/e), and build up "cred"! There are also some providers that are very newbie friendly, and don't require much in terms of screening as long as you don't come across BSC in your communications. My first pretty much asked me for age/ethnicity, and we had a fantastic time together.

Also, not sure where you read you get VIP with 2 reviews? Personally don't know if true or not, just curious if that's a thing, I haven't seen it. I know P411 gives you a free 6 month trial if you can get two well reviewed providers to refer you.

Feel free to PM me if you need any more help, I suspect what we look for might not be too far different....

"SO, HOW MUCH IS THIS GOING TO COST ME?
Becoming a Basic Member is FREE. Just click here and fill out the form. After you have created a username, you will be offered several options on how to become a VIP Member:

a. One way to become a VIP member is to submit reviews. After you have 2 reviews posted on the board, you become eligible to become a member with 30 days worth of access time. You will then receive an additional fifteen days for each additional review that we post. You will need to fill out a Become a registered user before you begin submitting reviews. Your VIP Membership will be activated within 24 hours of us publishing your reviews."

Eligible, so it may not be a guarantee, but still. Thank you for all your help, you seem to be one of the few that didn't outright attack and troll me, so thank you again.

My first outing went so well, the provider was more than I imagined, shes still on my mind even today. Are we allowed to name providers on this board? I would PM you, but I got one more review to go to get VIP access, and no PM privileges until than haha.  

That could be why my screening for this provider went so quickly as I gave her my real name and work. I asked about it during our session and she just stated that she has her ways of verifying my work to make sure I checked out. I do get what you mean though, definitely need to lessen the amount of information I give out and how many people have it.

I didn't know that about P411, maybe I'll ask my provider to refer me, and when i find my second provider,  she can refer me as well, two birds with one stone! and all that i could have spent getting VIP and P411 can go towards the provider instead, much more efficient. -- Modified on 6/23/2015 11:03:52 AM