I'm a long time browser but a newbie to this hobby.  In fact, I want my first experience to be this coming weekend as an early bday present to myself.  To that end, I did a ton of research and picked out 2 girls I was really interested in, one independent and one with an agency.  Both are expensive and high end.  Both are highly rated for NYC.  Emailed them both and told them I was a newbie, willing to do a phone screen and was really hoping to see them in a few days.  No responses....Not even a no thanks even though they advertise as available on the date/time that worked for me.

I get that I don't have references.  I get that people have to be careful.  I don't get what it is I'm supposed to do to get in the door though?  I'm not interested in stepping down on my standards and how else would I get a review without doing so?

I also investigated P411 and other verifiers and I just can't offer up my info for work verification.  That's off limits for me for many reasons.  I'd be willing to offer up other info for verification but I'm just not comfortable with my work info being verified.

What to do?

I didn't email them both trying to get them both together with me....I emailed them individually hoping that one would have availability.

I may step up to the dual approach at some other time but baby steps, baby steps..

Search for some newbie-friendly providers.  They can give you references for here and P411.  Once you get some refs, then go see your high dollar gals, but hey, we all started out the same as you.  Since I don't know what 'other' information you can offer up for verification, it's hard to give you more advice than this.

Swim

My first time I experienced the same problem.  You need to give them as much information as possible.  You also need to understand that many low volume, high end providers are somewhat firm in their screening protocols.  I was able to provide my chosen companion's assistant with several websites where I was featured, interviewed, photographed.  It enabled her to see that I was legitimate, and after they were checked out I was approved.  After my first date I was able to get verified for Date-Check by that provider without having them go through the employment verification process.  Once I had Date-Check ID things were much easier.   I don't know how long ago you contacted the ladies that you selected, but it's not unusual for it to take a few days to get a response.  Another option offered to me was to do a "meet and greet" in a public location (bar or coffee shop) before actually having a date with a particular escort.  Bottom line here, this is being done for the benefit of both of you.

END OF MESSAGE

...or were you just going on the web site? P411 has an 800 number on their site you can use. You actually talk to someone and work out a way to be verified by them. There are many that can't use work info like you. There are also many retired etc. that have to use other methods. Call P411. See what they can do for you. They have a reputation for working with people.

-- Modified on 1/7/2014 10:46:34 PM

1. Explaining that you're looking for new but friendly providers
2. And that You're willing to provide verification info. But rather it not be work.
Then see what you get.  
You might have to show some public profile like your LinkedIn, etc.  
Keep your VIP here so you can respond to PM.

Good to know.  I looked on the website and started the app but stopped when I got to the work info.  I'll call tomorrow.

If you have been reading the boards, you should realize that YOU don't get to make the rules. The women do not want to be arrested.

You may have to "lower your standards" in order to get some reviews. I understand not giving out personal information, but the higher end gals often just won't see a newbie. Find a newbie friendly gal or two and get some references, after you are established as a legit hobby guy, THEN you will be more able to "pick and choose".

Again.

Good luck!

Another good idea.  Thanks.

Will post on the NY board now

You are a self confessed newbie, have no references, and won't give up work info.

Girls want to be safe. They want to make sure you are for real and not just playing games booking a phantom session. They want to know you are not an officer of the law, a woman beater or axe murderer, a thief or mugger, or just an unbearably ugly person. What other info can you offer her to assure her of that?

Also, girls make rules and do not love it when newbies or other unknown poachers come along and ask them to bend or break those rules.

Girls do not usually jump into 3-somes of YOUR choosing - CERTAINLY not with a first session with a newbie. They prefer to choose their partner themselves, or at least screen the other girl as carefully as they scren you. They are wiser than you, and understand that no matter how gorgeous they are, or how hot their reviews, there is a real big chance that the session will fizzle due to massive expectations on your part coupled with a lack of chemistry between any 2 of the 3 people involved.

You are only thinking about your own situation, and do not realize that girls get dozens, maybe hundreds of inquiries just like yours. Some will write back and say no thanks, but most will just ignore the request - they have probably posted rules somwhere, you have probably chosen to ignore them or have tried to negotiate them on a first date, and they have chosen to ignore your request.

Start slow. Build your rep. It won't take long to build up enough references to see anybody you want to see - many other posters here have given you good advice on getting started. And, the higher your expectation for your first session, the more likely it is that you will crash and burn, no matter how much you spend.

Good luck.

I'm more than willing to provide info.  Just not willing to have someone call my place of business and ask about me.  That seems to be the MO of most verifiers, from what I understand.  I will try contacting some of them to see if they have other methods of verification.

But how does a meet and greet over coffee change anything or help with verification?  Just because I sit down for some Joe with a potiential client does not mean I am safe now  or does it make for good screening.

-- Modified on 1/7/2014 11:04:45 PM

When I callto verify employment information I first ask for a number that can be easily look up on the Internet to verify that that is and business number and the name of the business is the same. Then I ask for a few good times to call. When I call I will ask for potential client then when the potential client pick up the phone I will hear his voice matching it to the one I've already spoken to previously and that is it. I do not ask if you work there and any information along those lines. I do not say this is ms. xxx escort can I please speak with xxxx. I simply keep it professional and just to make sure that you are there.

I was worried about that too.. but that's not what they do..
All that happens is that you give your direct dial number (or extension) at work to P411.. They called that and left a message that was very innocuous on my voice mail with a number code. I then went to their web site and input that number code.. that verified that the work # was mine and so on.. They don't call the HR dept and start asking questions.. I found out that's what they do when I called the 800 # and asked questions..

That method would be tough.  I work from a home office so my number is my number.  There's no way to look up and call an office # then a different home or personal number.

I would offer my home land line number though (it's in the phone book) and other info like others have said (LinkedIn, etc).  I just don't want anyone calling the corporate office and asking for or about me.  

I'm hoping to call P411 today and get some other options.

Not sure what "other" info a lady could use. Did you at least let them know what info you could provide? I know a zero answer from both is annoying but they most likely do not want to waste time with a guy who won't/can't provide what they need.

I was in the same boat but I don't have a job. I can't get verified on p411 or date check until I get references. Which after 6 months I'm still working on to get .. but I was able to see some nice agency ladies when I was in Canada this past November. I'm still trying to set up a date with newbie friendly providers so I can forgo the work verification. Just be patient because it will payoff in the long run.

They called my main line and asked for me. Secretary put the call through to me and that was it.

I also was scared, but really it was painless and very discreet.

The OP needs to understand that providers need to feel comfortable, and that's why they verify. And if you can't provide references, you'll need to be verified in some other manner. I think P411 is the best and easiest way to do that.

use an innocuous excuse like a reminder of an upcoming doctor's appt.  When they are forwarded to your extension, often times they will simply hang up w/o talking to you, as they now know you do actually work there.  In your case, since they may not know you don't work in the corporate office or they can pretend that, I would guess that they will be told that you really work from your home office and maybe be given that number.  In this situation, they also know you do work for that company.  That's all they need.  Trust me, they are not going to put your job in jeopardy, that would not be good for their business either.

Good luck,
Swim

There are p411 providers who also advertise on TER, EROS-GUIDE, and DATE-CHECK. Even though you are not verified by any site, they may still see you with their own screening process. Once you get them to verify you, you can at least get Date-check. I'm not sure about p411.

My first screening was through an agency herein Baltimore, Desirable Companions. I was terrified about the info they asked. Then I received a phone call on my cell, the number that I had provided them. The screener new my wife' name and Birthday, my sister's name and birthday (who I have not lived with since my mother's house.) , and used questions to verify that info. If you pay one of these online backgroound check companies to do I search on someone, you wioll see how much info isavailable from just a name and  the name of the town you live in.

cross my fingers, I have not been outed yet, and I've being hobbying for a year.

...information.  He is/was concerned about having someone call his place of employment.  

   He told me that he is happy to share his Linkedin profile, etc.  It's a start.  I assure you, there is no need to call a gentlamn's place of employment to verify that he works there.

    If a gentleman is not curently employed, it is not a deal breaker.  I verify and visit with retirees, and temporarily unemployed frequently.

Hugs and Kisses,
Kelly

I won't get into their exact techniques, but it is very discrete. For those that want more assurances, call the telephone number published at the P-411 web site. They will be happy to discuss your several options.