I am a newbie , I admit . 44 years old and single like yourself . I learn quickly so I had to insert my .02 cents worth .
Red flag # 1 - she called you . It a golden rule so to speak of this hobby . I am single so I understand your cool with it. I would not be up set either , BUT .........You broke a golden rule , so BAM - Red Flag alert !
Red flag # 2 - the purpose of the contact . Her being broke and offering 1/2 price . Come on dude , Red Flag alert !!!!
Lets look in the crystal ball ........You set up another date with her . She now understands what she can and cannot get away with you . I can lay on my back , call him when I need something and he keeps comming back ! Every session from here on out will more than likely be worse than what it currently is .
Then comes a call , I need my cell phone bill paid , my rent , my electric bill , it goes on and on . Most hobbyist's are finacial wise and stable to afford this P4P , SOME providers are a mess in every aspect of their lives = The two red flag alerts you are seeing right now !!!
RUN DUDE , run fast !!!
My experience . Third date with her , 2 hours late , Told me she needed to text her next appointment and then did so - ON MY DIME !!!! Told me she was hungover from 2 bottles of champagne , cocaine , and arriving home at 4 am . The main event was her laying there - big surprise . RED FLAG ALERT !!!!
I contacted a provider and we set up an appointment. She told me she only does incalls so I went to her place. I wouldn't say the session was great, but it was certainly above average and I told her I wanted to see her again in about a month. Then a couple of weeks later, she emails me and says she's desperate for money and would come to my place for half-price. I admit I was tempted, but had other plans, so I emailed her back and declined. I never heard back from her. I always thought that it was a no-no for a provider to contact a client unsolicited. I'm not married so it really didn't bother me, but now I'm hesitant to see her again. Does this happen often? I can see if I knew her well, this may be appropriate, but after one visit? And if I see her again, should I even bring this up?
This does happen occassionally, but since you are new at this you should be very careful in the future with this gal. At least she didn't ask for a loan.
The problem you will have going forward is that if she sees you as an easy mark, you may get more of these types of requests in the future. And it could get pretty nasty depending on the provider.
My suggestion is to forget about her, and block her calls/texts. She'll figure out real quick that she needs to find some other "sap" to fulfill her ATM requirements.
This will not be the first time this will happen. Somehow, she knows that you are a bachelor or you have informed her, or whatever the case may be for her knowing your marital status. I have also had many calls and text from providers wanting to see me to cover their cost or what have you. Remember, when you see a provider, its for your convenience, not them. You are not obligated to see anyone if the pressure continues--its usually a bad sign if they consistently call or text you back after the initial decline.
If you do decide to see her again, then let her know that you are not comfortable with her contacting you. She should understand this. I've found out that it is important to establish a healthy communication relationship with my providers, that way they know the dos and don't of a client. Also, providers that do establish effective communication skills are more likely to respect you as a person instead of just another client.
that you give off signals that you encourage the gals to "call and text you"? And let's remember, the OP is a newbie and was looking to know if this is a "common" practice.
I have seen quite a few gals over a lengthy period (pre TER days as well) and I have NEVER had a gal call/text me for a session/money. My guess is that you (and the OP) are giving out suggestions (subtly) that you want this type of intrusion. Most of us hobby to avoid exactly that...and I suspect that is what the OP is really looking to understand.
My original reply suggests that, as a newbie, he move on quickly (and shut her down immediately) and perhaps recall what he is saying in a gals presence. Don't get personal...Don't get suggestive...Just do your business and move on to the next gal.
And only see WELL REVIEWED PROVIDERS. This will greatly minimize this type of inapproriate behavior from a provider.
Good luck OP!
First, let me congratulate you on your status of remaining free of intrusion--never had a call or text within your pre TER days, absolutely amazing! That is something I only wish for. Now, just like you, I go in, talk a bit, but don't reveal too much about my personal life (as to martial status and so on), do the deed, and leave.
Here are my instances, it differs from the initial post of the one visit provider. For example, I see a provider 2 or 3 times, after that, I get calls and text messages telling me they are in the area and so forth. I don't text back, if I get another text, I tell them I don't have the time. Now, after the initial decline, I will continue to receive a couple of more text from the same provider when they are in the area later on in the future. After I ignore the text, they seem to get the message. My only advice was, it you don't have the time, then don't text back, or let her know that by establishing a healthy communication relationship.
I do not give out hints or signals that I encourage this type of relationship, you think I somehow enjoy this-rejecting their invitation and declining their request? Again, I don't inform the provider about my personal life, they usually ask, and I just simply tell them I want to remain anonymous about that or I do not feel comfortable informing them about that. I am also not a sucker to be taken advantage of either. Now, I only informed the initial post that this type of communication is common and can happen to any1 and gave appropriate steps to minimize future outcomes. I hope I made sense during this post, or at least my previous post, and I hope I was able to answer your question appropriately.
It happened to me a few years back. I saw a provider "outcall" and then again in a short period of time. Had a great time with her both times. She just got the impression that I had become a regular because of the repeat business. With all we go through to get to know providers, they have clients that they become comfortable with as well. I mean "sex" is a two way street when "hobbying". She didn't call she text messaged me as she was not getting the type of business she had hoped for and needed some cash. Also I had thrown her name around as a reference to see other providers. She eventually fell off the radar and stopped posting so she probably needed the business.
I am a newbie , I admit . 44 years old and single like yourself . I learn quickly so I had to insert my .02 cents worth .
Red flag # 1 - she called you . It a golden rule so to speak of this hobby . I am single so I understand your cool with it. I would not be up set either , BUT .........You broke a golden rule , so BAM - Red Flag alert !
Red flag # 2 - the purpose of the contact . Her being broke and offering 1/2 price . Come on dude , Red Flag alert !!!!
Lets look in the crystal ball ........You set up another date with her . She now understands what she can and cannot get away with you . I can lay on my back , call him when I need something and he keeps comming back ! Every session from here on out will more than likely be worse than what it currently is .
Then comes a call , I need my cell phone bill paid , my rent , my electric bill , it goes on and on . Most hobbyist's are finacial wise and stable to afford this P4P , SOME providers are a mess in every aspect of their lives = The two red flag alerts you are seeing right now !!!
RUN DUDE , run fast !!!
My experience . Third date with her , 2 hours late , Told me she needed to text her next appointment and then did so - ON MY DIME !!!! Told me she was hungover from 2 bottles of champagne , cocaine , and arriving home at 4 am . The main event was her laying there - big surprise . RED FLAG ALERT !!!!
This keeps your normal phone clean for all time... (you want your hobby life kept separate from your normal life). If a provider calls, texts, etc they just get a shut off phone. Only turn the hobby phone on when you are hobbying.
Also use a separate hobby email with one of the free hosts.
I don't doubt that many providers may be hard pressed to pay their bills... the econimy is sour & will continue to be for the forseeable future. You decide when & how often you can play. Period.
very odd cuz youd think she m,aybe had a old reg shed call for emrgencies help in event that happened- i dont know sounds weird-
I contact my old clients so they don't forget about me. I do e-mail to mention a special I might be going on if I know they can't afford my usual rate all the time but this is not usual. I'd never offer 1/2 my rate though...
I never remember if a client tells me "see you in a month!" or "See you in a week" during our session! When about 2 weeks have gone by after our meeting I'll shoot them an e-mail saying something like "Hey John! How are ya doing! Just e-mailing you to keep me fresh in your mind" just to get them thinking about me. Then they might mention they can only see me once a month and I'll note that and not contact them again until a month rolls around.
I think sending e-mails unsoliciated to clients is not bad as long as they don't border on frequent or annoying. Sometimes people forget to stop and smell the roses...
Have been contacted by several providers over last 6 months. First time, it was somewaht of a suprise, but now consider it something that is becoming part of culture change. Can breakdown calls into 3 basic categories. (1) Those calling asking for help or offerring a discount - basically let them know I'm not in a position to help them; particularly if I have only seen them once before. If offerring a discount, may take them up on it if I liked being with them 1st time. (2) Those who call or text just to say hello - it happens. They are letting you know they are available without actually making reference to getting together. (3) Visiting providers who you have seen in past letting you know they are back in area. General Rule; stay away from those who are calling with a hard-luck story; if you help them out; they will call again and as long as they can get you to buy their stories. Also, they are probably calling others at the same time; they are rip-off artists (learned the hard way)