I know most providers want some type of background info.  If you have never used a provider before, how do you provide a reference?  Is providing your employer enough for them to check to make sure you are not law enforcement?

This varies for each provider.  Some won't see anybody without references from other providers.  Others might be willing to verify your employment as a means of screening.  It just comes down to whatever the lady is comfortable with.  And if you're not comfortable with her requirements, just find another lady.

each provider is going to have different comfort levels.  i would just figure out who you want to see and call them and see what they want to know.  some don't ask for much if anything at all.  but yeah, each is going to be different so i would just make contact.  they need to feel safe with you and if you can't make them feel that way, then just move on to someone else.  only you know what you are comfortable sharing.

I made an initial email contact but signed it An Admirer. I didn't know if I should even leave my name. Any comments on how open an honest we should be with the providers? Are they using their real name?

i use my real name, i'm not worried about it.   it's all about them feeling comfortable so i think you should.  they sometimes need to verify your employment or somehow figure out you are not LE.  I think most providers do not use their real name but some i know do.  That of course is for the safety of them.  They can run into stalkers sometimes.

you will more than likely need to give it up at some point.

If screening is required, which is by most quality, well-reviewed indies and angencies, your real name is the bare minimum that they will need to clear you.  I have even been asked by ladies, particularly agency women, to show my DL as a basic check to prove I am the person that scheduled the appointment.

If you ask a woman to visit at a hotel, she will want to know the name you are registered undered to verify the visit.  Since you will likely put the room on a card, and many hotels require ID at registration, so the name you will be giving is your real name.

Don't worry to much about this.  If you are dealing with a well reviwed lady/agency, my experience is that you can trust their discretion.  Remember, to you this is a hobby, diversion, and fun.  To them, it is their livelyhood.  It is not in their interest to create undue hassles for clients.

I know you vets are going to say I am crazy. I am planning my first meeting to be in my house. It's not the money, there are just no short stay hotels in my neighborhood and I am well known in the community. I only have 2 neighbors and believe me they won't see anyone coming to my house. So for me this is the most discreet way of doing this. I have no problem giving my name or a contact number at my place of work. Do you think this will fly?