Yes, im a provider and i was always warned about rule number one in this business!

DO NOT ESTABLISH A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS WITH A CLIENT

Sometimes in this business you want to feel "normal" and personal emotional relationships are less likely!

Recently I ran into a client and instantly I was drawn to him! Im also involved in the Urban Music and modeling industry and unfortunately I run into guys like him all the time but it was something about him that made me MELT!

We started off with a normal 2 hour session before his flight and it was extraordinary! The Connection was present like we've known each other for years! It was natural...... normal... i guess?

While parting ways we agreed for him to contact me after his flight. So he did!

Ever since then we talked and skyped every single day until we agreed to meet in Beverly Hills California while he was visiting his home away from home! Im from California so I was excited!

We where like little kids in high school when we laid eyes on each other again! I thought the trip was going to be only us but it turned out his cousin was the "3rd wheel" (his cousin was a cool guy)

During our time together he seemed very possessive and controlling with his friends family even me and it made me extremely uncomfortable! All he did was boast about his achievements and possessions and it drove me insane. Things went from Bad to Worse when we decided to go to Vegas the next day.

We met up with his business partners/friends and ran the town that Saturday night partying at one of vegas most established clubs! It was sex money and drugs everywhere but I continued to stay "sober" from the drugs and sipped on a glass of moet while the rave lights glow sticks and drugs floated around me! Being sober and "semi" bored I started to observe my environment and gained a distaste for the man I thought was the prince of my fairy tale dreams. My feelings poured over my face so I masked my feelings with a smile during the rest of the "night/morning."

After The club His friends joked with him saying the girl he was flirting with in the club looked like a transexual but he was very passionate the young lady wasn't! I stayed Mute until i voice my opinion during our night cap! (I guess I was wrong) he made a valid point I wasn't his girlfriend or wife so I shouldn't have an opinion! Once I agreed and claimed I no longer cared he blew up! Since that moment we argued! Im not too big on confrontation so I remained quiet and cried silently in the bathroom! We where able to keep face around his peers!

The day before my flight he decided it was best for me to get a room near LAX considering my flight was at 6 a.m the next day of course I agreed! He booked a hotel for me but without him knowing I  decided to rest at a hotel of my choice! Our issues went from 8-10.

My last day in LA was spent arguing with the man I was infatuated with. The guy I thought I fail in love with at first sight! He didn't bash me on my lifestyle but he definitely made it a reminder!
I've been with wealthy men athletes entertainers before but they never knew Vonnie!  This was the first time I opened up to this subject so I felt more comfortable with him! So why do I feel so wrong?

I hated the way everything ended and days later I'm still crushed.

Am I wrong for trying this!

When you start spending time with someone outside of just the intimacy and the stuff that's easy.  It's really easy to be happy when you're doing stuff together that's fun, like having sex.  It's not so easy to do when you're with someone for a few days or a weekend, and then have to do mundane things, like talk and spend time around each other when there isn't an "event."

I made the same mistake myself with a provider I had a great time with.  Took her on a great weekend date, and we had a lotta fun things planned.  She was wild and sexual in bed, and we had a lotta fun, but turns out she was a ridiculously bad drunk, and her constant drinking turned the weekend into a total and utter shitshow.

She and I are still friends, but I haven't seen her since that time.  We just know that we tried it, it wasn't a fit, and we moved on.

I'm spending a little over a week with an ATF who I have never reviewed (she is UTR), and that will be telling to see whether we end up being more serious or whether we don't.  I think we're gonna have a great time, but who knows for sure?  I have a friend who takes girls on weekend trips as a litmus test for seeing whether there's something to do further along the relationship.  Day one is usually great, and you fuck everywhere.  Day two is more of the same, with some events in between, and maybe some time by the pool.  By day three, you better like hanging with her as a person because the novelty of sex will be over.  And he usually finds that the long weekend ends the relationship.

Good luck.  Hope this doesn't sour you on things, but remember that the guy you see for an hour or two isn't necessarily the same guy the rest of the time.

Feel free to PM if you want to talk offline.

i assumed communicating through skype constant over night phone chat and full day texting was enough to show a deeper connection then just sex.

i arrived thursday and returned home tuesday we only had sex 2x!

We had more to talk about then just "sex"

The only issue he had was what i did to make a living. he looks down upon it. which is understandable! But he accepted it for some odd reason. if sex was the only topic to our relationship the texting video chats and phone conversation would've been left to a minimum. i can tell when a man is only attracted to me sexually.

he played his role well if it was "just sex"

then yeah i was played because the trip was not paid for. Well he bought the ticket and SOME of my shopping on rodeo and melrose dinner etc etc  but  not for my time. but yeah im taking saddle lessons now.
lol im joking!
thanks for making me laugh

While this turned out to be a bad experience, I've always felt that I would rather go for it and find out for sure than always be wondering "what if?"  As I've stated here before, the only true regrets I have in my life is foregone opportunities.  

As a side note, I've had three relationships of varying lengths with girls who are escorts/pornstars and have been married to my wife (whose one of them) for two and 1/2 years.  Interestingly enough, none of the problems with any of these relationships had anything to do with the girls working in the industry so relationships here can develop and with my current one as an example flourish.  

That said, such situations are most certainly a rarity, given the dynamics of the interaction and situations.  Like any truly enduring relationship, you need to be friends first and foremost cos the other stuff will only sustain things so far.  Next, I think it has to be mutually-agreed upon open relationship, the proverbial "what's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander."  Finally, and here's where it can get sticky, the man needs to be truly secure with himself and not hypocritical so that he  doesn't find himself calling her a "whore" at some point.  I have been in plenty of arguments with two of the women mentioned (the other one ended when she was deported!) and never once did that come up because as noted above, none of our issues were rooted in the business so I never found myself thinking that and therefore never had to suppress the statement.  So there. And if you're not sure what a "run-on" sentence is, that last one's a good example but I'm too tired to clean this up!

Look, the guy's a jerk.  That doesn't mean he is evil, he's just a jerk, and unfortunately, your chemistry matched, so you fell for him.

It's a story as old as time, but now you know better and he's in the rear view mirror.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back up on that horse and ride.

unfortunately you met the proverbial chauvinistic pig..he might seem lovable and cool at first..but as soon as the luster wears off you saw him for what he was..these guys have money..they love dope..they believe in their own superiority..they are simply USERS..devoid of any real emotion..incapable of love..you are lucky you saw him for what he really was..a girl without your insight usually winds up being crushed..never judge a book by its cover..you have to turn a lot of pages to see the real truth..

He could bide his time for few months and then you would have been REALLY screwed.

Lina

I agree Mac. And don't you just think soooo highly of guys who pay for sex and then turn around and look down on the provider for her "lifestyle"?

We meet someone and the sparks fly.  It may lead to marriage, but more often it leads to heartache.  Yet nothing ventured, nothing gained.  Why should escorts be any different, you are after all human?  Remember fondly the heat of the moment, and forget the rest.

totally agree..these idiots tarnish the hobby for the guys who respect and appreciate their partners..no wonder so many girls keep everything hidden inside..it is because of arrogant selfish assholes like this guy..

I guess I wanted that feeling again without keeping the big secret. being an escort you can't be too open about the lifestyle. considering how we met it made things a lot more peaceful. it failed but I love that butterfly feeling. I'm extremely picky so hopefully I can catch my butterflies again and they'll stay in my jar.. lol

Sorry about your mishap. But you should always stick to
Your rule. This industry is tricky. Never let guard down.

Butterflies often die soon, but they are sooooo beautiful fluttering around.  If you go through life never experiencing those butterflies, you've lost what life is about.  Great sex pales in comparison to those butterflies.

If you had not taken a chance you would have never known how it might have turned out.  Unfortunately that guy was a jerk.   Next time take it slow, don't be so quick to act on your emotions.

I agree that if you can meet somene doing this, there is in a sense a real advantage because you don't have to be totally secretive about what you do.  I have an unreviewed ATF that I am getting close to, and she is wonderful.  The fact that we met this way makes it easier because she knows I am seeing others and I know she is seeing others.  It's fun and it's business, but there isn't a weird jealousy or a sense of "I don't know what she is doing."

Whether it works for the long term or not, I dunno.  But life is about taking risks.  And sometimes it works out nicely.

Coming at this from the other side, I established a "friendship" with a provider which ended after I bought her a car and gave her cash to quit escorting (she said she wanted out) and go to school.  My heart was in the right place but my head was up my ass.  Some clients (like me) are lonely and want companionship but not the hassle of dating.  I thought I was up to the NSA thing but I was totally wrong.  We both got hurt feelings out of it, but my wallet felt the greatest pain.

I think the rule goes both ways.  You might meet your future love on backpage, but the odds are stacked against it.

Yes, we are human. We're made to feel closer when we're intimate with someone. But we can't mix
   what we do in our "Extra Curricular Lifestyle" with our personal lifestyle. When I'm with a provider
   I try to be everything she needs me to be for the time we have together and expect the same in
   return. Providers can feel lonely just like us hobbyist. So enjoy the moment--really indulge in
   eachother. Every good thing has an end and well what was fantasy is over and we all must return to
   or "Real Lives". Save your heart for someone not affiliated with industry. Hey I don't make the rules
  I just play by them.

it takes 2 to Tango & unfortunately this seems to have broken down.  You were not wrong to try.  It is rarely successful.  But there are members here who's SO's are providers or former providers.  It is successful just often enogh that we can NOT say NEVER.  

You would want to avoid getting played...  when one shifts to a civie style relationship...  some sharing of expenses is in order.  It should not be all on you.  

If you were there professionally...  then the #1 hooker rule is stick to business & avoid controvery.  

The problem may be that the situation was muddy...  not sure where you stood?  Gone civie?  Professional companion?

He's the loser here.  He threw a good thing away.  But if he's into partying & drugs... maybe you know the real person now.