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Newbie - FAQ

Relax....
Bostonguy57 48 Reviews 958 reads
posted

You are getting laid, not taking the SAT's!

RedCloak3869 reads

Hey Friends,

I am about to consummate my hobbyist status either this weekend or the next.   Here's my checklist.  I've done 1-18 and am about to do 19-21.  Let me know what you think and if I missed anything.

Thanks,
RedCloak




Checklist #1: Preparing To Become A Hobbyist
--------------------------------------------------

1. soul searching

   * Does hobbying violate my code of ethics?   ==> No.

   * survey the personal reasons why I am doing this

   * consider spiritual/karmic consequences


2. logical rationalization

   * this is the best thing I can do for myself right now

   * emergency assistance for Maslow's hierarchy of needs


3. Assess and accept risks

   a. LE

   b. STDs

   c. Crimes committed by provider
       * theft
       * violence
       * extortion/blackmail
       * stalking

   d. Future background checks
       * pre-employment
       * US Security Clearance
       * mortgage
       * other credit
       * pre-apartment lease approval

   e.  Getting blacklisted wrongfully

   f.  Reputation damage if caught by
       * family
       * friends
       * co-workers
       * SO  [not applicable in my case]  
       * media [won't care unless I run for political office]

   g.  Sexual injuries/death

   h.  Becoming emotionally attached and/or falling in love with a provider


4. Compose cool Eliot Spitzer-esque speech in case
   I get caught with my pants down and this becomes a scandal.

   But most likely no one will care. :(


5. Join TER


6. Pay anonymously (as reasonably possible) for VIP membership at TER

  http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=62705&boardID=33&page=1


7. Read Newbie Manual on TER

   Yes, all of it!
   As well as all the posts that branch off the parent posts.



8. Picked my first provider to my liking
  and read ALL 100+ of her reviews on TER

   She is almost exactly my type (actually would have been perfect a few years ago, but she made some modifications recently)


   I still have some blatant question marks about her, but with 100+ reviews,
   I think she's pretty low risk.


9. Trim my pubic hair

   Allow a couple of days time to let the two small nicks to heal to minimize risk of contracting STDs.


10. Consciously wash (and RINSE) armpits, genitals, and perineum really well from now on.


11. REFRAIN from jerking it so I can recharge and have ..ahem.. a strong showing on game day.


12. Locate a few surcharge free ATMs near my place and near where I'll hobby
   and withdraw hundreds of $$$$$$$


13. Buy 12-pack of my favorite condoms


14. Place fee in plain white envelope  (make sure I have some plain white envelopes)


15. Buy a hobby phone with CASH
   http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=63391&boardID=33&page=1


16. Activate hobby phone from a computer that's not mine


17. Buy top up minutes with CASH and add them to hobby phone


18. Set up voicemail on hobby phone with "standard number" vs "record your name"
   and "standard greeting" vs "recorded greeting"


YET TO BE DONE
--------------------------------------


19. Get verified on Date-Check

20. Contact aforementioned provider to set up date

21. Just get out there and fuck!
   http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=62303&boardID=33&page=1


-- Modified on 11/26/2009 8:58:43 PM

-- Modified on 11/27/2009 12:05:33 AM

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Bostonguy57959 reads

You are getting laid, not taking the SAT's!

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hiddenhills944 reads

BTW, I didn't read 2 thru 20 I scrolled down to your last point #21.

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GaGambler1224 reads

I am pretty sure you saved yourself a migraine. lol

To the OP, you aren't a married man. Save yourself some stress and just get out there and fuck. This isn't rocket science, nor is it an act of international espionage. It's just sex, with a little common sense you will never have any repercussions (I have seen literally thousands of providers over my 35 years of p4p) and if on the off chance you ever do run into LE, it's only a slap on the wrist.

PS, my cavalier attitude towards the hobby only extends to single/divorced guys like the OP and myself. You married guys should take every precaution mentioned in the OP's post and then some.

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niceenuf1102 reads

Here's my checklist:

1. Join TER
2. Randomly find a provider I am interested in
3. Read the 5 most recent reviews
4. Look in my wallet (yup...I got some $$$ in  there)
5. Make an appointment
6. Give my verification info
7. OK...now I can go ahead and fuck!

About the steps that are missing...providers have condoms, reading review number 98 from 4 years ago doesn't mean squat to me, a little common sense makes it possible to use my actual real life cell phone, and if I don't have the cash on hand I really don't mind paying a $2.50 ATM fee.  Maybe for some constructing the Mission Impossible scenarios are part of the allure???

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GaGambler1571 reads

I guess some people are just more anal than others. lol

My checklist for hobbying this afternoon reads;

1) Find a hot provider

2) Pay her

3) Fuck her

4) Enjoy the rest of my day and repeat as necessary. lol

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niceenuf1288 reads

Point well taken...my list just got cut in half!

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Ripped_Van_Winkle1238 reads

I don't ever recall a newbie putting together such a list.
You sir, are smart. The analytical approach is a good idea. Just don't let it get in the way of a session.
Time to go to 19/20 and 21! When your done go to 22. Post the review, then work on 23. Covering your tracks.
Sounds like you are all set.

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keystonekid1577 reads

real women with a life outside of the business.  Christmas shopping, taking care of the kids, etc. sometimes affects their work schedules.  Don't try to make a last minute appointment.

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dfwjim1231768 reads

All providers carry condoms.  However, condom is an implicit agreement from the provider.  Providers know what you want.

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songwrite151374 reads

I'm pretty new to this as well having seen one provider so far and having another one arranged for a couple of days from now and I suppose I went through a checklist like this in my mind to an extent but I think if I wrote it out I would have been way too nervous going in the first time to enjoy it.  Relax and choose someone with lots of good revies and everything will be fine.

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icycold1798 reads

You might want to pick a couple of back up providers on the chance she doesn't choose to pick up the phone or accept your verification.

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shudaknownbetter1524 reads

Providers should have condoms, though I have had a Fav provider ask me to stop & pickup some (which was very inconvenient as I did not know the area & wasted some time).  Also, if you find you prefer a certain type/brand/size it's helpful if you provide it.  
The lady will need an opportunity to inspect the package for damage, date & etc.  She retains the right to decline to use condoms supplied by others, though I've never had it happen.  
It might be best to buy the 3 pack...  enough for a single date with spares just in case.  Leaving the box sealed until ready is a double level of assurance.
skb

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joleneineugene1352 reads

Related Link: Jolene in Eugene

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feeldeez0101558 reads

just curious whats up with 3d???  I don't think future background checks can be affected by this.  Or can they???

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electech1280 reads

Don't obsess on numbers 1 through 4.

20.5 Relax, Relax, Relax

My biggest problem the first time was through nervousness that I did not quite overcome during the session.  The lady that I saw was stunningly beautiful and I was a bit shell shocked for the entire hour.  The next time was ten months later, and I was calmer and better able to enjoy it.

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SaschaDoesIt1415 reads

You actually made a list?  Heh, that's cute.

Agree with previous.  Just go fuck, honey.  It really isn't rocket science.  Think of it like a first date where you know you're gonna score at the end of it.

Good luck!!  Let us know how your date goes!!

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swimtrekr1342 reads

Relax and just let it happen.  If you go thru all the shit you outlined for every date you want, you will drive yourself nuts before you see the girl.

Swim

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