Well, I have done my homework and have my eye on my first experience. Screening is done..have had to cancel on this poor gal twice, both legite and I contacted her well in advance both times.

Both times I had to cancel I felt depressed and relieved all at the same time. I am not sure what this is telling me.  I know I am a nervous type with performance fears and the guilt factor.

Any advice for the first timer?? If any of you could share your experience, it would be a big help.  Thanks to all!

That sounds familiar.  Remember, to become an experienced hobbyist, you gotta dip your toe in (figuratively of course).

Have you discussed with the prospective escort exactly what your fears are based on?

If it is lack of knowledge of what you are expected to do, a good provider can discuss this with you before hand to settle your concerns.  I suggest having a friendly phone chat with the person to break the ice socially.

On the other hand, there could be something deeper in your psychology that is holding you back.  You should look into this and perhaps hold off on entering this hobby until you are at peace with your inner self.

Perhaps bring this question up with The Love Goddess on The Erotic Highway below.  She is incredibly perceptive.

Is this guilt because you are in a relationship? If so think of it this way...this is a relaxation outlet for you.  Better this than cheating with your secretary.  The right provider will take her time with you and you might be suprised that performance issues go away when you are in the room with a new sexy woman.  There is a level of excitement to it...especially the first time.  Good Luck!
-Catherine the Classy Courtesan

Relax. Everyone has to have a first experience. I was completely unsure what to do, what to say, etc. I let the provider take over and she guided me through. Now I'm a seasoned vet. If you do your reasearch, and contact a well reviewed provider, just tell her up front its your first time. She's the pro.

However, you havent even gotten to the meeting as of yet. Obviously you are nervous, but you have to find out why. Are you cheating on a signifcant other?, fearing the lady is a cop?, unsure what to say to her or how to act in front of her?, concerned you wont be able to perform?, etc. Only you know the answer. But if you want to see this provider at all, you better not cancel on her again. As they say, three strikes...

Try to relax. Performance shouldn't be an issue for you. If the lady is any good at all she is going to roll with it and make things as easy for you as possible. It may take you a few visits with a few different women to get your legs under you so to speak. I don't know your situation so I'm not sure what you mean by "guilt".
I was nervous the first time I did this as well but I knew it was what I wanted.  if you aren't sure of this maybe it's the wrong time to do it.

to this day, I usually arrive at a session with a dry mouth and sweaty palms.

Concerned about performance?  Don't be!  She has likely seen it all before.  If it happened, you wouldn't be the first man who couldn't get it up, popped too soon, or wanted 2 rounds but was only good for one (the latter 2 have happened to me).

Guilt is a biggie with lots of causes.  Try to figure out why you feel guilty and try to deal with it.

Sounds like you've found an understanding provider, but I would recommend that folllow through the next time, unless she labels you a time-waster.  If your concerned about being a newbie, let her know, I bet she knows how to deal with that, and will make your day.

If you are a VIP, feel free to PM me to discuss further.

-- Modified on 2/19/2007 11:22:21 AM

I've only been at this for 2 months now and I thought I was still getting nervous each time, but I soon realized it was anticipation causing the butterflies. Once inside the door, they go away real fast... trust a fellow noob on this one!

Remember, we all had our "first time".  I have a sports background so mentally I consider it preparing for a game.  Plenty of fluids 7 days out, including pinapple juice.  Lite pre-date meal 4 hours prior to, teeth, shower & shave 1 hr. prior, mints 15 minutes prior, candles at 10 minutes.  Then, game time and the butterflys go away with the first kiss.

My first time I was so nervous I pratically gave myself TMJ from clenching my jaw -- no joke.  However, once I started talking with the lady I was seeing, they all went away.  Remember, this is all just for you to have a good time, and if you stay cool, tell her you're nervous and just have fun... then you'll have an experience you'll never forget.

Also, set your expectations low.  Don't go in expecting everything you've dreamed about will happen in the first hour or even the first session.  Just chill and go with it.... it's the bomb.

It is your call... sounds like you may want to get some advise from Love Goddess on the Erotic Highway board.