Just over a month ago, I had my first good experience with a provider.  Well, it was my second experience with a provider of any kind, but the first one was a real ROB.  

When I was setting things up, I contacted this girl by e-mail and she always replied within a day or so (we bounced a few e-mails back and forth).  Last week, I wrote her a paragraph about how I enjoyed my time with her and stuff.  The deal is I saw her on an out-of-town trip.  Having traveled all night, I checked in and got situated about six hours before I had our session scheduled.  I hadn't slept in about 30+ hours and was exhausted.  Naturally, I wanted to wake-up about an hour ahead of time to get a shower and relax.  I didn't get much rest and I was nervous, after my previous bad experience.

During our small-talk I mentioned my drive and how tired I was and apologized if I didn't seem "with it".  Well, we did our thing eventually and I finished up with about 10 minutes left on the clock.  So we just talked and stuff.  I think probably seemed a little distant.

Anyhow, a month later I e-mail and tell her I had a nice time, she surpassed my expectations (personality-wise), I enjoyed her talents, and that I wouldn't mind seeing her for two hours next time I'm in town again, which won't be for months.  Also, I asked her she would mind if I used her for a local reference when I find a good provider around here.  Unlike every other e-mail we exchanged I never heard back from her and I hope she doesn't think I have some issues, just because I was trying to be nice.

I thought I was being polite.  I know some of these girls may actually hate what they do and few probably see glamour in it.  To me, they are real people and, while they're not any meaningful part of my personal life, I enjoy their company and wish them well.  In short, I thought I was being a gentlemen and it was a nice gesture on my part.

Was this taboo?  Did I do something wrong?

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

I don't see that you did a thing wrong. I think it might be her. I have been in this business for some time and I have dealt with many jealous providers. (way too many. I posted on another board that one provider told me that her regular was LE because she didn't want him seeing me. Turns out he was just a normal horny guy (very good at DATY) who wanted to be with a black provider. She may have thought that she would be your ATF or the only one you saw and when you let it be known that you would be seeing others she got upset. That's the ONLY thing I can think of why she never wrote you back. You were honest with her about being tired and even left with time on the clock, something that is unusual. If I were you I wouldn't sweat it.

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

IMHO, You did nothing wrong.  Providers get tons of email a day and, it takes time to read and respond to them all.  If she for some reason had a problem with you emailing to thank her for a good session, It's her problem not yours.  Providers I've seen, Thought it was real nice that I took the time to send them a thank you.

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

It was a month afterwards, which is par for the course, being that I am a procrastinator.  That might have not sat well with her, but I can't think of any other reason.

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

You didn't do anything wrong.  If she takes a lot of appointments and you are doing this a month after the fact, she may be having a difficult time remembering you.  It also may have been the kiss of death to ask her to be a reference.  I know I'll get slammed for saying this because most providers offer references willingly.  It's a necessary part of the job.  Reciprocity greases the wheel for everyone.  However, I have noticed there can be an element of professional jealousy.  I wouldn't think this would be the case when you saw the first away from your home city and you are asking for a reference at home.

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

Some of these ladies get hundreds of emails a day and they do a lot of work sceening and such. I've seen my ATF a lot and sometimes it can take a week for her to get back to me. You didn't do anything wrong. You have only seen her once and no offense but she may not remember you. Just hang in there and try again but don't become a nuisance.

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

Thanks for the advice.  Should I elect to see her again next time I'm in town, I'll just try to schedule another appointment and mention that I've seen her previously.  If she asks questions and decides not to see me, I suppose she didn't like what I did.

You did absolutely nothing wrong. I hope you aren't letting this stress you because you shouldn't. BTW does your name mean what I think it means?

My name?  At work, we all call my boss "old dirty bastard" or "odbbd" with the last two letters being his initials, and I made up a name just on a whim when I came here and thought it up.  It's not a Russell Jones tribute (I made it up before his death) or anything of real significance.

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

Don't get emotional.It's business and $$$ for the ladies.If you like her, say Thanks when you live, call again if you want to see her and that is it!
By the way I a mnot a provider!

Ok. I thought it was a tribute to rapper OBD. Thanks for clearing that up.

Reid I scare her off? (Would love to hear from providers)

Oh, it's not really an emotional attachment.  I mean, she was a nice girl, but nothing more.  I don't want to get a bad reputation or anything by doing something taboo, which is what prompted my original thread.