how does one let a provider know that he is "larger than normal" without violating the concept of not discussing services or details on phone when contacting provider

My guess is you don't mention it.

And you accept whatever limitations/restrictions the provider has when you meet.

You don't.  We're used to this.  If you are so huge that you require special condoms, bringing a sealed box of your own to the appt is usually okay.  If you really feel like you need to say something before the appt, wait until you've been screened before bringing it up.  And don't put it in writing.

-- Modified on 7/31/2010 9:19:24 PM

Once you've seen a provider that gives references, this is something one provider can tell the next.  You won't have to talk about it so much.

I try to subtly mention it, I was meeting one provider at a outcall and she called to say she was a little late because she was stopping at a drug store for condoms and asked if I had a preference...I told her it would be best if she got Magnums...she chuckled, got them, and after the session said that quite often guys ask or bring Magnums but don't really need them!

Another time I mentioned it duing a "coded" conversation about Greek (she asked and I told her it probably wouldn't happen because of a fit issue).  She told me not to worry, she uses female condoms for larger guys...led me to a great experience, female condoms rock, especially for a larger guy.

It is awkward at times to mention without sounding conceited...I do always carry a suply of Magnums in an sealed box just in case.

I would say not to bring the subject up unless she lays the ground work & then be discreet.
 
I always bring a sealed box of my prefered premium condoms with me.  (I once had a Fav call me back, when I was already on the highway...  asked me to pick some up.  The detour made me late & was not able to get a selection.  Lesson learned!)
I respect a lady's right to refuse to use condoms she didn't supply though I've never actually been declined.  I have had ladies say "I have those."  I just said, "I like this kind."  I expect her to check the packaging & expiration while I'm in the bathroom.
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I wish there was a way because I can't/won't see large guys. It hurts and they don't get anywhere hear the experience they should.

And, if you like to be teased a little for being undersized?

Undersized rules for me! More I can do for longer, so it's a win, win. I wish I could say something like this on my website....

"Gentlemen who are on the smaller side welcomed with open arms. You will be appreciated in so many ways.

To those who are on the larger side, please, no disrespect, but I would prefer if you chose someone who is willing and loves to take care of you."

If you're hung like an elephant, find some way -- ANY WAY -- to let me know before we meet, because I guarantee the experience will be disappointing if you don't. If you have a P411 or Date-Check profile, mention it in your "about me" section. References can NOT be relied on to let a new lady know for you; sometimes all I can pry out of a reference is that she saw you and you were "cool".

When I encounter this issue, unless he begs me to stay and understands the rest of the date will be VERY, VERY limited, I offer his money back (or at least part of it, depending on how long I've been there) and leave. I've been in close contact with my own body for a long time and know its limits.

I could not have said it any better. Especially this part...

"I've been in close contact with my own body for a long time and know its limits."

I really get bothered when a gent tries to convince me to give his large penis a try, like I am undecided and not sure about my limits. Yeah...that's when it really goes down hill.

Ditto to this part too...

"When I encounter this issue, unless he begs me to stay and understands the rest of the date will be VERY, VERY limited, I offer his money back (or at least part of it, depending on how long I've been there) and leave."

Carrie/Literbike,

I honestly never thought about a woman's limits relative to size.  How big is "big enough" to mention to a provider?  Maybe not actual measurements but as reference, would you say that if a guy needs to use large sized condoms that it should be mentioned?

They leave both of you smelling like a big tire and the sensitivity is not good.  

Female condoms are great, but I've discovered Lifestyles Kings for the larger gentleman.  They work great, the sensitivity is good, and they don't leave both participants smelling like one huge tire!  

Lifestyles Kings are great!

How cool is that...i just bought a pack of Kings this weekend but haven't used them yet.  Now I can't wait to test drive...AND...i won't smell like a big tire!

That would help but using the word "condom" is problematic. Here's an idea...let's use cycling as a lead in. If a guy is on the larger side and has to use magnums, you could say something like...

"We have bike riding in common. I ride a specialized road bike, sidi shoes and a large helmet."

That would tell me that we are not compatible due to his size.

...you are too big for this ride.


Edited to add: This is an entirely personal situation, of course -- what is too big for one lady may be juuuuust right for another lady and totally make her day, or it can make no difference at all. Until the Lord or science sees fit to make us all have indentical interchangeable parts, it's gonna be an individual judgement call on whether or not to bring it up beforehand.

-- Modified on 8/2/2010 8:57:16 PM