If she only indicated she would like to see you but never confirmed an actual appt. with time and place then she would not be a no show. As in all other walks of life someone with that attitude I would just ignore and look elsewhere.
I have tried to connect with the same provider three times and all three times she gave every indication she was looking forward to meeting but was a no show and made no attempt to advise of a problem. I understand how life can throw us last minute curve balls but this just seems wrong (and yes I've adopted the three strikes rule). Are bad reviews given for something like this?
you cannot give a review if you didn't actually meet. But you can make mention of this on your local board to warn others of her "flake factor".
3 strikes is 2 more than I would allow. If she doesn't try to contact you to explain her NS, I'd just move on to the next one. No matter where you are, there must be several potential lovely ladies that are more worthy of your attention than one who pulls an unexplained NS.
I never set a date by e-mail unless you are a VIP on TER. I checked you out and i'm very confident of who you are.
You are on the newbie board asking this question so I will guess that you haven't been around to long. As an out-of-towner I wouldn't have made a date with you until we talked on the phone once you arrived. If you were a local with a local phone number we would talk and set a time and place to meet. If that wasn't done then we have no plans.
OK...Did you set a time and date to meet? was it thru e-mail or a conversation.
It seems there is an underlying message with your post but I am not sure what it is (not to mention the "I checked you out" reference) ... My experience occurred in the Carolina area. 1. We exchanged emails for weeks. In her words, the communication allows for a better experience (yes I was from out of the area) 2. We talked on the phone several times 3. She asked that I call early the morning of to confirm, which I did I am not sure what else I was suppose to do other than walk away after the first incident. The best advise tends to be the obvious - thanks.
"I am not sure what else I was suppose to do other than walk away after the first incident."
Bingo!!! That's really the only thing you could have done differently, don't beat yourself up you did nothing wrong. The only advice I can give except to possibly change your three strikes rule to a one strike rule is to post this on the Carolina board.
Some people may advise you to not name names, but I firmly advise you to do just that, You will be doing your fellow hobbyists a service. NCNS is one of the most irritating things in the hobby and noone should put up with it.
No real underlying message but wanted to be sure you did talk on the phone. miscommunication happens all the time via e-mail. At least it does for me. I demand a phone conversation or real good screening to save my time.
You should walk away the first time a lady makes plans on the phone with you and then does not call to cancel. That is rude to say the least.
Unless you had a specific appointment for a specific time and she didn't show up when she was scheduled to. Talking about arranging an appointment via email and actually scheduling a specific day and time are two different things
That being said, If you made the arrangements that I outlined above, I may have given her two chances, never three...
Good points... I had specific day, time and location. What I left out before was that time 1 and 2 we were to meet for dinner first. I had confirmed reservations (with her (via phone) and the rstrant). Enough venting... thanks.
If she only indicated she would like to see you but never confirmed an actual appt. with time and place then she would not be a no show. As in all other walks of life someone with that attitude I would just ignore and look elsewhere.
From the additional information you provided, you certainly had confirmed dates. I'd have not rebooked without an appology & reasonable explanation. It may not have cost you the donation but it cost you a lot in terms of trouble & lost / wasted opportunity.
While reviews are not permitted for NCNS, a local board warning would be a good thing.
As far as I'm concerned, three consecutive NCNS constitute a pattern and one that needs to be brought to light fairly quick. It's OK to be understanding but not this much!
Although you can't post a NCNS review at TER, you are welcome to post it in the Carolina Board. If you post as an alias, it's unlikely to make an impact. If you decide to post it under your real handle, you must be prepared to confront a bunch of annoying white knights.
You can also PM me and exchange information. I hope you were not trying to schedule a date with one of the two best known NCNS in our Carolinas...
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