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Re: newbie question about references
impposter 49 Reviews 758 reads
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First, as long as someone checks references they are dependent to receive them from others (to verify you) and they should reciprocate. That's the theory, anyway.

Second, there are many ladies who tour. You might only have a chance to see them once or twice a year when they visit your locale and match your own schedule and they know that. I'm pretty sure they are more likely to provide references (Hay! I got my first whitelist reference and I didn't even know it!) rather than expect you to take cold showers twice a day until they return.

Some do have limits on referrals: time (within 6-12 months); number (a few, not 50!); they should actually remember you so they are comfortable about what they say in their reference ("Are you the fat, smelly guy with the skull tattoo who broke the toilet seat or the guy in the pin striped suit who brought the sushi?".)

acehearts2806 reads

This is more directed towards providers, but anyone can chime in.
Here's my question, I've seen a couple of providers already and I'd like to feel that I would be loyal to them in the future, but I'm feeling out my new hobby oats and want to experience different providers. How do you providers feel when you get calls for references from other providers for a client you were just with recently? Does it cause bad feelings or do you shrug it off. I know it's just business, but I would feel like "Hey, why didn't he just call me again?" This may be a stupid thing to worry about, but I just wanted to see what the general feeling is.

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swimtrekr1016 reads

many providers are happy to give you references.  I have read posts about ladies that did not like it when a client visited another lady.  If they are truly professional, they will provide a reference for you.  After all, some day, the proverbial shoe might be on the other foot.  Remember, it IS a business, they are not here to become your girlfriend, nor do they expect you to become their boyfriend.

Swim

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acehearts1433 reads

Thanks. Yea, I would assume they would be professional about it but at the same time it IS a business and might they not think that they are losing business when you go see someone else? Just curious really. I guess if I repeat with someone and get treated differently because I used her for a ref, then I just won't go back.

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impposter759 reads

First, as long as someone checks references they are dependent to receive them from others (to verify you) and they should reciprocate. That's the theory, anyway.

Second, there are many ladies who tour. You might only have a chance to see them once or twice a year when they visit your locale and match your own schedule and they know that. I'm pretty sure they are more likely to provide references (Hay! I got my first whitelist reference and I didn't even know it!) rather than expect you to take cold showers twice a day until they return.

Some do have limits on referrals: time (within 6-12 months); number (a few, not 50!); they should actually remember you so they are comfortable about what they say in their reference ("Are you the fat, smelly guy with the skull tattoo who broke the toilet seat or the guy in the pin striped suit who brought the sushi?".)

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hiddenhills1623 reads

You should always contact the provider you're requesting the reference from, to let her know you want to use her as a reference, before the lady you want to see contacts her.

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Yasodhara617 reads

Generally speaking it's fine.  Providers are aware that many hobbyists do so because they like variety.  Most of the time it's no problem.

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angieluv07794 reads

...this will not be a problem.  I find the MN ladies to be very open and friendly when providing references.  MOST providers are not jealous or possessive and realize there are enough clients out there to go around.  If someone acts as if you should see only her, I would see this as a big red flag.  There are horror stories of threats to expose clients if the client doesn't see "just her."  This is psycho behavior, very immature and "junior highesh." (not a word, I am certain, lol).  

I have a few regulars who see only me, some regulars who also see others, some who have seen me only once, and some who see me now and again, but I realize everyone is not going to click and just as in "civvie life" we are attracted to certain people above others. And yes, variety is the spice of life.

My sister providers have always been more than willing to give out references, but please do ask if you can use a provider as a reference.  It is simply good manners.  Most all of those who provide references have one thing in mind: the safety and comfort of her sister providers. Safety, above all.  Jealousy and possessiveness will not get her far in this business.  Looking out for one another, being supportive of one another, and watching one another's backs is what it is all about, and MOST do just that.

Hope this helps.

Angie ;)
XOXO

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acehearts627 reads

Thanks for the responses. I will make sure I contact them before asking for refs and hopefully they will be mature and professional enough to not flip out or I suppose I won't see them again.

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