Yes establishing a comfort level and that the pictures are real is the best you can hope for. The comfort level is hers only in most cases, if she goes on her gut feelings. There is nothing you can talk about to verify her that might not be seen as solicitation if your sitting next to LE. Helping out a new provider might end up very rewarding, but it is extremely risky with just as many bad outcomes as good outcomes. Ask yourself are you experienced enough to take the risks? Have you read enough on these boards to even know the various risks you would be taking? Since the answer to those two questions is usually both no, that is why just about every other post on the Newbie board says stick to well reviewed providers. Then if you read even more you will see the posts of guys who went ahead anyway and did not get the experience they wanted. Before review sites we all had to take these risks every time coming away many times disappointed with the service. Now you guys don't have to start out taking risks. You can still take them just try to understand them.
Hey all -
I'm sure I will catch hell for postining this here (someone will find the answer linked on here somewhere else - but for the life of me I have searched and can't find it!).
I am a newbie to the hobby (I have partaken in European countries where it is legal - we need t work on that here) and have set up a meet and greet (not a date) with a provider who is also new and unreviewed. I am pretty good on what I should bring to this meeting to verify to her that I am not LE or tring to bust her.
My primary question is this, if you were in my spot and meeting a provider in a public place for a chat (nothing more at this point) what would you ask the provider for for verification? I can't exactly ask for her last W2! A quick flash back by the rest rooms? A grope under the table? Any suggestions or references to this question posted elsewhere you be great. You can also email me as my username at gmail with any tips or suggestions!!!
Thanks to any and all that reply with useful info!!!
Happy hobbying to you all and hopefully to me soon!
Thx!
Z.
I'd be very curious about a provider that would do what you are looking for. If you want to pay her for her time with nothing but meeting to chat, it's your dollar. But that is not something most guys would do. I find it hard to believe that a provider would meet you to chat without compensation, unless she is really clueless about the hobby.
Unless she is well reviewed, I would not bother. Since you indicate she is new, why waste your time and hers? There is no way to really determine her legitimacy by meeting her for a drink or coffee.
Swim
In general, providers are busy with other things and aren't going to just "meet" for coffee - without a donation. Unless they are really, really bored - in which case they probably would go find a friend to do something with - or clueless. It is a business, not a purely social event.
Have fun and stay safe!
Summer
NO PM's/email only
[email protected]
but, paid for or not, it proves nothing. You can't get busted for taking someone to lunch. So, even if she seems fine, you could still get busted on your second date when you drop the envelope in her hotel room (or yours). The best way to be sure is if she's reviewed.
A serious provider will not waste her time, getting dressed & make up to meet you for coffee. If she does, if proves she clueless about the business of providing. At the very least it will cost her an hour or more of compensated time. That would be foolish for a professional provider.
It is sometimes hard for a lady... even an attractive one with good skills... to break into the business.
As a newbie, you really should get some experience... and read the self help section, and read back on this board until you can answer every question without peeking. Then you will understand the ins & outs of how this hobby works so you won't flub up & blow it. I'm not saying to never see her... but once you have some experience you'll not make any mistakes & not be put at risk if she does... or get ripped off...
I was a Newbie... Not that many years ago. I did not know about TER... I got ripped off. But not since I learned from all the good folks here.
skb
I would NOT meet them or anyone else off the clock. Fortunately I do have reviews and am easily searchable but I do not understand what you can possibly get out of this meeting in regards to hobbying. At best, you will find out if she shows up and is the girl in the picture - nothing else. I hate to be a spoil sport, but I would seriously wonder about someone who would be willing to meet you for a meet and greet at all.
You're new at this. New gals definitely deserve a chance to have someone help break the ice but history says that's best done by veteran hobbyist who know how to investigate taking one for the team. New guys, stick to the tried and true, a girl that matches your desires in looks, menu and budget, until you have the experience to know what a good provider is.
I've done something similar on two occasions with very good results. In both cases, I was already sure that the provider was legit. It was done more to allay jitters, once on her part and once on my part.
With one rather new girl, she had previously cancelled an appointment and appeared unsure about me for no particular reason. I heard that she had recently been robbed, so she was being extra-cautious. I offered to meet her at a restaurant and take it from there (or not). We hit it off right away and after about five minutes, headed to her hotel for a wild romp.
In another case, when I arrived at a provider's motel, I had misgivings because of some shady looking characters milling around. I retreated to a diner next door and called her. She offered to come over and talk. She apologized about her poor choice of hotel and told me to check back with her in a day or two. Then she slid onto my lap for a nice french kiss right there in the booth. Two days later, I met her at a decent hotel where we had a fantastic session.
Nobody produced any ID or expected any "proof" of legitimacy. Although I already knew enough about each girl to feel assured, meeting them in person added tremendously to that, and, I'm sure, vice versa. It's ridiculous to say otherwise.
It's an unorthodox plan but not unheard of. For one thing, it wouldn't be as convenient in some cases as it was in my examples. Obviously, it's not something a seasoned professional would agree to, however there are times when I'm interested in someone who isn't that.
It isn't the most recommended way for a newbie to get started, but I don't necessarily see anything sinister about trying it as long as you keep your wits about you.
Yes establishing a comfort level and that the pictures are real is the best you can hope for. The comfort level is hers only in most cases, if she goes on her gut feelings. There is nothing you can talk about to verify her that might not be seen as solicitation if your sitting next to LE. Helping out a new provider might end up very rewarding, but it is extremely risky with just as many bad outcomes as good outcomes. Ask yourself are you experienced enough to take the risks? Have you read enough on these boards to even know the various risks you would be taking? Since the answer to those two questions is usually both no, that is why just about every other post on the Newbie board says stick to well reviewed providers. Then if you read even more you will see the posts of guys who went ahead anyway and did not get the experience they wanted. Before review sites we all had to take these risks every time coming away many times disappointed with the service. Now you guys don't have to start out taking risks. You can still take them just try to understand them.