Newbie - FAQ
Re: I'm starting to get a complex!
Maybe the whole town is 'cycling' together and you just have to wait a week.
DOH!
So I've been hobbying for a few months now, the odd dabble here and there - I've met some wonderful providers. But just recently, I almost feel like I've been blackballed. Please tell me I'm just paranoid.
On a number of occasions (and 3 this week) emails & phone calls have been ignored by providers. I am always polite & courteous, and never mention anything inappropriate. Is the business so recession-proof that providers can afford to just ignore potential new clients?
This week I even had an appointment set up with a lady visiting from out of town, who I'd been aching to see. But the location call never came - subsequent calls and emails have gone unanswered.
Is this normal and just part of the hobby? Or did I miss a meeting where everyone said "Hey, no one f*ck xsmithie"??
Providers are hurting in the NYC market. Wall Street, and Madison Ave (ad business) are decimated. That group made up a huge population of hobbyists.
If providers (4 in one week) have blown you off, you MUST have done something wrong, or be on a blacklist aka a DNS (do not see list).
It's not reasonable to think that 4 out of 4 girls in one week shit on you for no reason. That defies logic and any reasonable statistical metric in a depressed economy. You need to review WHAT you say to girls, and HOW you say it. You have 4 reviews, and may have done something verboten in one of your sessions.
Something is wrong with the way you approach this hobby. Sorry.
Thanks for your response I.S, I appreciate your input. Two things...
1. You have no reason to believe me I know, but trust me I have always treated the girls with the utmost respect, both in person and when contacting them.
2. If I HAD said or done something wrong (and forgive my naivety here) but where would a girl from out of town get the heads-up to drop me on the day of our appointment, when she was willing to see me the previous day?
I know that I have a good relationship with a certain provider, so I'll ask for her feedback, but I've got to believe I've just been unlucky.
You know what, if I was reading this from someone else, I'd have the same response... I just don't get it.
It happens to everyone I would imagine. Really the only thing you can do is not sweat it and look elsewhere. I do wish providers would do the courtesy of simply responding back declining a request,but you can't always have what you want.
I guess some guys might then press the issue with a gal and insist on knowing why and maybe that is why they can't get back and decline. It is discouraging, makes you feel as if they think your some kinda axe murderer or something when there really is no rhyme or reason.
Unless its persists I doubt that it is anything more than a coincedence. Your lucky to be in New York where the selection is a hell of a whole lot better than in Ohio, just think of how frustrated you would be if the one or two girls who didn't get back were the only ones you wanted to see...lol...I am sure New York has a better selection, one you have interest in is bound to get back.
Coincidences don't happen 1000% of the time. This hobbyist has a problem, and is doing something very wrong. He had 4 specific serious problems in a week. That's not coincidence. That's a clusterfuck by any definition. He needs to examine HOW he approaches women, and the hobby.
Without a sampling of his inquiries to the ladies how can anyone say for sure what the deal is. Is it out of the question that, especially during the summer, that many ladies might be off on vacation or something??
Just trying to be optimistic. Why would a person who was blatantly inappropriate in their contacts with a girl even be posting a question like this, I assume the guy is not some weirdo.
So here's a summary of my communication with the visiting lady last week which has been typical...
I completed her on-line request form maybe on the Thursday for an appt the following Tuesday evening. Didn't get a reply, so I followed up with an email on Sunday saying (paraphrasing) "did you receive my request, very much hoping we can get together".
She sent me an email late Monday night saying "sorry for late reply, yes 6pm would be great, I'll call you with details". I responded "great, any chance we can bump it to 6:30pm for work reasons, no problem if not"
That was the last I heard. As 6pm approached and I had heard nothing, I called and left a msg asking (in a friendly manner) if we were still on.
Never heard back.
Problem somewhere?
A similar problem happened to me even with a provider I've seen once prior. I never heard from her when we were supposed to meet for our 2nd time. I texted her the next day if she was okay and she responded rather nonchalantly with a sorry. Anyway, she asked if we could meet that day and I told her I didn't have time. I'm probably not going to go out of my way to meet her again even though she is one of my ATFs as far as body.
I wouldn't worry about it too much. There are flakes in all walks of life.
Maybe the whole town is 'cycling' together and you just have to wait a week.
DOH!
I've sent three emails to ladies recently (all requested first contact to be email. No tele#
in ad) All well reviewed escorts, not one responded, and I gave them all the info they requested, and date and time I wanted to see them. However, I sent a fourth email to a lady, she responded and I'm seeing her later today.
BTW, I usually do not send a second email, if I don't get a response from the first email. I just keep moving on.
-- Modified on 6/18/2009 6:55:05 AM
Within the course of two months, I got NCNS from three gals, two of whom I had seen before, one twice!
I felt then as you do now, but then things just blew over and I haven't had any problem like that since.
There are many reasons for a NCNS, we'll never know the truth, don't even try to find out.
Just get back up on the horse, refresh yourself on The Newbie Manual, and ride.
Your post makes me think you didn't do anything to
get blacklisted, anyway you would know if you did.
You can string 2 sentences together, etc...
Have you thought about one of NYC more reputable agencies, Belle de Jour, or Aphrodite?
Of the girls have long review histories, and high scores.
Cyclist is right. An agency provider is far less likely to NCNS on you than an independent. That's even if she doesn't like how old you are (most independents have a 30+ age restriction). So go see a few agency providers, build up a good track record, and try again. But not with the women who already rejected you; they're not worth your time.
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