tell the girl your new, I know that I'm a lot more gentle on newbies, lol. Just don't ask too many questions, it makes us nervous.

1. Start with email and be polite. Describe yourself and what you are looking for.
2. If a phone number is given, ask if it is okay for you to call her and continue a conversation (so you can get a better sense of how she might be in person).
3. BE NICE BE NICE BE NICE! Makes you look safe and the provider will be more comfortable around you during the appointment. DO NOT BE RUDE ever i.e. a jerk unless you ask if your session can include dirty talk.
4. Keep in mind NO ONE IS PERFECT. She is just a person like you. Women are way more self conscious about themselves than you may realize.

Provider suggestions.....

Start with a well reviewed (lots of reviews) lady aged 30+ with her own website. These providers have seen all types and will be more able to ease your mind, be more caring, nurturing, understanding and have more experience at making guys feel comfortable during an appointment. Stay away from the 25 and under crowd with just a few reviews to begin with. Trust me on this.

Build upon that experience.

FIRST, read the "newbie manual" the link is at the top of this board.

Do NOT mention any sex act as that'll freak the lady & think that you're L.E.  

Learn how to be discrete.
Larn what a hobby phone is & if you need one.
Have a discrete private e-mail no one else can access.
learn what the 2 call system is & how it works.  

At that point you probably should get VIP.  How to discretely pay for it.  You may think it's a waste of money but it costs far less than even one spoiled date or wasted opportunity.  
With VIP you can read the complete reviews & select a provider who offers the services you desire.  
For a Newbie, choose a provider with at least 6-8 good reviews by hobbiests who have done multiple reviews.  This shows that the hobbiest are real & the providers actually do what they say.

As you gain experience you might want to branch out & risk TOFTT...  but that is more of a gamble & I suggest sticking with sure things at first.
Best Wishes,
skb

In addition to the excellent advice above, I would also suggest signing up with a verification site. It makes the whole date set up process much easier.

Lurk on this board, the  GD board and your local
regional board to the left. Learn to use the searc feature on the boards. As others suggeste
get a VIP membership. Good luck.