this would be my first time with an escort.  i was going to go last night and the lady replied right away.  It was a last minute thing and was never a really firm appt.  now I want to schedule a firm date for this coming friday and she won't return my txt msgs now.  the other girls i like require references how in the world would i get those.  looks like i'll probably be sitting at home friday night.

Well, don't get locked in to one lady.  Often wise to have a backup.  Once you've had a few dates it's easier to get in with a previous lady if the prospect falls through.  
Many ladies don't book a week ahead...  they don't set their schedule til a day or 2 ahead.  A possible exception are ladies who have a web site that shows a schedule & opportunity to book that way.
Comments Ladies?
skb

But it sounds like you may have no-showed. Your definition of "firm appointment" may differ from hers and this is probably why she is not returning your messages.  I would move on to someone else as she has probably decided that, true or not, you are a time waster

You get references by seeing ladies that give references.  You may want to start by seeing an agency girl or two first. Scheduling can be much easier and once you have an appointment or two under your belt you will be more comfortable with the entire process.  You will also be able to use the agency as a reference in many cases though not all indie girls will accept an agency ref.

It looks like you had the right idea until you shot yourself in the foot. NCNS is not tolerated by many ladies, or gentlemen either for that matter

I am a little confused. Are you saying that you were going to see a lady last night, but the appointment was never really firm, and you are now attempting to set up an appointment with the same lady for this coming Friday?

If that is the case, I am not surprised. If you jerked me around last night, I would block your phone number and e-mail address and move on to others who aren't flakes.

LOL Why do you think we ask for references? To avoid exactly that sort of nonsense.

SinsOfTheFlesh, I think you're a bit out of line.  This is the Newbie discussion board, yeah?
It stands to reason since I'm posting in the newbie board, I must be new to this and I'm trying to figure out if I did something wrong.  It would also make sense that if I took the time to post here I'm trying to learn, if I did do something wrong what it was so I won't repeat the process in the future.  Keep in mind this is new to me and I've never been with an escort before and I'm trying to learn what is proper etiquette. The last thing I want to do is waste the girls time or mine.

1.  She was an outcall escort, and I requested that I would like to schedule an appt with her preferably that night if possible.  Frankly I was surprised to have even gotten a response so fast.  

2.  she gave me where she meets people and I thought since she was outcall that maybe she would come to my city which I inquired.  She did under certain conditions which I didn't meet.  I told her I would do the best I could.  (does that constitute an appt.?)

3. I did not make her wait around for hours, I did not say I will be there.  Within 1/2 hour of telling her I would do my best I told her it just wasn't going to be possible and that I was sorry.  

so if being new to this makes me a flake then so be it.  money is money doesn't matter whether I give it to her or someone else.

There was a reason I prefaced my reply with "I am a bit confused". Your original post was not clear and rather difficult to understand exactly what happened.

Your response was much more understandable. No, it does not fit the criteria of a NCNS, so my only other advice is to be patient and to continue trying.

Some ladies will see a gentleman without references if he is willing to provide sufficient personal information to make her feel comfortable seeing him. Considering contacting a lady by e-mail, explaining that you are new, and indicating your willingness to provide whatever information she feels she needs to see you without references. Chances are, you will be successful with many ladies. Also consider joining a site like Preferred411 or Date-Check, both sites are dedicated to screening gentlemen, and many women are willing to accept membership in a verification site in lieu of references.

Good luck.

I have changed my mind or something has come up.  IF she gave you a phone number or a location, she was expecting you and you NO SHOWED.

BG may have hit on it...  even if not a NS (No Show) she may consider you a time waster.  

At this point she may have blocked your calls.  If you really want to see her, try a message with APPOLOGY in the subject line.  Then appologize for any misunderstanding, commit to a date & see if you get an answer.

The easiest and perhps the only other thing is to move on...
skb