I certainly wasn't planning on telling any of them about money. The money I referred to is an investment my parents put away for me a long time ago and are letting me have now. I probably should have mentioned that I'm still in my twenties and in college, so it's not like I'm some high-powered executive or something. I just have a one-time fund to draw from and I wanted to use it for this.
So, here's my situation. I've remained a virgin far longer than I should have due to a combination of psychological trauma and physical and mental illnesses. I've already lost so much of my life that I'm terrified that whatever I do now, it won't matter. But one thing I do know for sure is that, due to everything that's happened, my sex life will almost certainly have to start with an escort. I have access to a significant amount of money that I'd like to use for this.
The problem I have is that I live in a part of the US where there isn't really anything available that I'm interested in, not to mention concerns about legal issues. I looked at other options and I found Toronto to have a great deal that interests me. Last year, I tried to go up there to solve my problem, and it was an unmitigated disaster. They searched all over my car, then found text messages on my phone that I'd sent to one of the escorts I was going to see. Long story short, I panicked, told the best story I could come up with, and they sent me back, threatening to arrest me if I came back without a better story. I've been in a deep depression ever since, feeling like my last option was now closed off.
What I'm looking for now is a good pretext for entering Canada, if I were to try again. I have all of my documents in order, and no criminal record or anything. I really need help on this. In my state, I don't think I could handle being arrested.
Thanks in advance.
...on TER. Click the "Search" tab above, enter "virgin" in the 'Search for' box and change the default 30 days to 3000. You'll find threads like this recent one...
"I don't think I could handle being arrested." While hobbying right in your home community is probably not a good idea, there are plenty of opportunities right in the US. First off, take a few deep breaths... this is not going to happen tomorrow but 'soon'. While we are all nervious on a 'first date'... it gets better with experience... you have to calm down & control your emotions. If not, you'll spoil the date and also look so conspicious that it looks suspicious.
Another thought... I don't recommend massage parlors... but some independant massage providers can ease you into the hobby. I started this way. A 'Hapy Ending' (HJ) is generally included. Some extras may be available...
It seems that travelers to Canada have their electronic devises searched regularly both going into & out of Canada. Photos too. (Possibly looking for porn.) I have no reason to go to Canada but I'd scrub all my electronic devises. Once in, I'd connect to the internet & retrieve information I needed. Scrub again before leaving. CCCleaner is a free download. Having it on your computer might be suspicious... never know about TSA or CBSA. It seems that CBSA wants to see confirmed reservations for the length of the trip. I would expect your name has been flagged for detailed inspection.
Yes, many 'missed' the opportunities of sexual experiences. A search will show these posts. I would not see the need to travel a long ways. If you could not find anyother way, there are certain rural counties in Nevada where prostitution is legal. NOT Vegas.
Start by reading the self help section, link by the life saver. OK, now read it again. Then start by reading back on this board until you can answer every question yourself.
Read about hobby phones, hobby email, the 2 call system, STFU...
When you can answer all the questions yourself, you can think about going for it.
Let me add... lose the language about having a "large amount of money" to play with. You should not reveal that info to anyone, lest you become a 'mark' to be expoited or robbed. Or married just long enough to clean you out. My ex, later told her family members that she married me for financial reasons, admitted she never loved me... and when the money ran out, she acted out until I left (we were living in her house... that I'd rescued).
Seeing providers is a cash transaction. Outside of paying the correct amount, they should not know your finances.
Here's a list of scams... you should be aware of.
http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewall.asp?BoardID=33&SortBy=DateCreated%20desc&Search=scams&SearchType=1&DayFrom=300&DayTo=0&ViewAll=1&MessageID=99681&frmSearch=1#99681
Once you have done your reading... you will need TER VIP to read the complete reviews. Do not see anyone who has scams in their reviews.
I certainly wasn't planning on telling any of them about money. The money I referred to is an investment my parents put away for me a long time ago and are letting me have now. I probably should have mentioned that I'm still in my twenties and in college, so it's not like I'm some high-powered executive or something. I just have a one-time fund to draw from and I wanted to use it for this.
A different approach... and maybe a good one for you... would be for you to get a hotel room in a decent place near a major metro area.
Then have the girl come to you. It costs somewhat more, with the room cost and often a gas / travel surcharge. You are in control of the room (never leave a provider with a room you registered for)... I'd book 2 hours, figuring one to get aquainted & one to play.
You could offer refreshments a snack, wine or soda or water {ask what she prefers} (leave all bottles sealed until she opens it... as a guard against tampering). Don't drink too much yourself... you don't want to have booze-dick! Bring a music player with a selection of music. (Put the music closer to the door & aimed at it, covers sounds in the room... still loud enough in the bed area. I like it a little soft, less distracting.
She should bring condoms with her but you should have a sealed 3 pack in case of emergency.
I often have dates like this with my favorite ladies.
You will need to find someone who is "Newbie friendy'. I would suggest you NOT pick the very youngest. I have found that the MILF providers... 25-35 YO... are more patient & understanding which you will need.
You might find someone by putting an ISO on the local board closest to your area or the ad board for the same. You would need to have VIP for them to message you through TER. Without a lot of trouble, you could make this a Special Occassion.
Do comparinson shop so you know her rates are inline with others in your area. You DON'T want the lowest & probably not the highest... leave that to you. You can't discuss prices but you should be able to find them through the TER search links.
Don't fall in LOVE with her. It's very easy to fall for a lady you have great sex with. That's the hormones speaking. You don't love her. You love what she does. Even saying the L word can be like poison to a provider... last thing they need is a clingy client.
If you devolupe a good rapor with a lady... you should take the opportunity to learn how to please a woman. While women are all constructed a little differently, there is a certain commonality. Be sensitive and let them guide you. There is nothing more powerful than the confidence that you can not only please yourself but that you can please your partner. You may find civie women more receptive to you with that confidence.
HV
I actually followed much of this advice on my failed trip. I set up an outcall for two hours with a provider in her thirties. I'm not totally ignorant of how all these things work, since I've been reading about escorts for several years now. Unfortunately, I had trouble with the implementation.
Your advice about not falling in love is well taken, and I'm confident that I can avoid that. I was hoping that an older woman could give me some advice, and maybe a little validation to boost my confidence, but I don't think there was a danger of me falling in love. I don't really want relationships anyway. The whole idea here was to get me started with sex so that I could move into a promiscuous, NSA-type lifestyle.
I hope you read all of his posts. All of us in this hobby are not looking to get arrested, but if you do your research thoroughly, this should be a minimal problem. Since you don't indicate where you are, I can't offer much help in locating providers, but in light of your problems in going to Canada, I would think you should do more looking around on the U.S. side of the border.
If you do not yet have VIP membership here, get it. Also, consider joining one or more of the verification sites, until you are able to see some providers and get some references. Feel free to ask any questions here or PM me, I'm the host of this board.
Swim
All my assistants deserve many kudos, PS, HH, BPS, and everyone else that chimes in on posts.
Love you guys.....
Swim
Unless you travel a lot for business or pleasure, in my opinion you would be better served finding a provider somewhere closer to you. One reason is that you may find someone that you feel comfortable seeing more than once, which would make it more possible.
I am pretty new to this hobby as well and can understand much of your hesitancy, as can probably most of the hobbyists here, who were all newbies at one time. Most of the people that contribute to these boards are helpful and there have been offers already to help you in response to your post. If you gave us some indication of where you live (at least the state, if not the city), I am sure that there are people here that could recommend a newbie-friendly and trustworthy provider that you can see and be introduced to this hobby, and to sex in general.
Another approach is to participate in these boards, get more comfortable with the hobby and providers, and learn. That knowledge will help you find a suitable provider to get you started.
I'm in Ohio. I've done some research, but haven't been able to find anyone around here that I'm actually interested in. The way I see it is that if I'm going to pay for it, I might as well get someone that I find incredibly hot.
The main reason why I want to go to Toronto is because of the variety. I wasn't just planning on doing it once - I wanted to have several encounters, with varying types of women. Different nationalities, races, that kind of thing. That kind of variety just doesn't seem to be available anywhere near me.
Yes, the fact that it's legal there was also an important consideration for me. I had hoped it would take some of the stress out of the whole thing - no need to navigate through a complex ritual of codes and euphemisms to avoid legal problems, just a relatively straightforward process.
Also, whether this is rational or not, I just get the sense that the whole escort situation in Canada is more "friendly", for lack of a better word. I just feel that if their culture is liberal enough to allow this sort of thing to be legal, the people and escorts themselves would be more laid-back or something.