Hi,  -- again, names have been changed to protect the innocent or the not naughty enough , any resemblance to real persons is coincidence.

I was wondering what my expectations should be about getting a reply if I send an email. Here's my experience so far (in brief):

SusieSunshine, BounteousBrenda, and LasciviousLatecia: email to request prescreen; no reply

AudryAgain: emailed about an extended night including going to a performance then dinner and then some quality time together (we had met twice before); no reply

CarefulCarly: emailed about a prescreen; no reply. emailed again about a prescreen and received what seemed to be an appreciative response about getting prescreened so meeting up at a later date would be easier; never received a message back about passing (or not) the prescreen).

LeisurelyLinda: emailed about meeting; received a reply about 3 weeks later.

DilatoryDiana: emailed about meeting when she was in the city; got an email back saying she was in town, but I couldn't meet so I asked her to let me know when she is in town again, she said she was in NJ and only a train ride away,  I asked how it would work with the train (logistically); no reply

FriendlyFelicity, HappyHollis, and SanguineStacy: emailed to meet or prescreen; same or next day reply.

Does this seem typical? Am I doing something wrong? I was hoping my reply rate would be better than on OKCupid, but so far it's not looking good.  :-S

Thanks in advance for any advice.

PS: sorry the message is so long, but I wanted to give you a feel for what's happening

Smarter than other newbs - you didn't lock in on just one or two and blow up their emails.

The response rate does seem a little low, but you just can never tell what's going on on the other side of the attempted communication.

Only thoughts - you mention 'pre-screening' multiple times.  If a provider doesn't mention pre-screening, she may just want you to get right to actual screening - ie filling out forms with details and providing references.  If you're making vague requests to start a back-and-forth outside their preferred process, they might just see you as a potential timewaster.

You'll see all kinds of flaky behaviour and then also some pleasant surprises - keep plugging away (or trying to) and don't take it personally.

The problem with these types of requests is that you're essentially asking her to invest time (and, depending on her screening methods, money) into a date that may never even come to fruition. In my experience, the guys who want to be pre-screened without having a particular date/time nailed down typically end up never booking an actual appointment. They usually try to schedule last minute or will say something like "if/when you come to my city, I'd like to see you!" only to magically be out of town or something when I actually do get there.  

You also are going to want to make sure that you're following her specific scheduling protocol. If you're just copying and pasting the same message to multiple ladies, it's going to be very obvious and you'll be pegged as lazy, insincere, or just a general timewaster.

...seen prescreening recommended so I guess it works for someone. The best advice given over and over here is contact the lady using her requested method. Let here know you want an appointment. Give here a time and date along with if it's  an in call or out call. Give her your reference info if you have any. If you're a newbie with no references be sure to check if she is newbie friendly (means she will see you without references) before you contact her. Be prepared to give personal info. You have to decide how much and what you're comfortable giving. Remember don't mention sex and money. Don't ask about specific services.

Tobi covered it. Many providers don't spend much time with prescreening. They will respond if your contact is serious. Date, time, etc. show you are serious.

Read the Self-Help Center. Read several pages on this board. Search for P411 threads and look into joining P411.  

You're using an alias so you have a VIP membership. Use it to your advantage. Check out the providers here on TER. Look at your regional TER ad board.

Thank you. I'm glad I asked. I thought I was being considerate by asking in advance.

Thanks. By pre-screening, I just meant before setting an appointment. I do follow the requested screening process, but I will make sure I'm not missing anything.

Thanks.  

I already joined P411, but I haven't noticed much response difference there. They have the request pre-screen button, so I thought that was how it should work.  

I'm willing to give out personal information, but I did join P411 so I wouldn't have to put it out there too much. Do the ladies generally require all the personal information if you are on P411 or Date-Check? To me it is often unclear on their pages.

The message I'm getting is don't contact until I have a specific date and time. I've seen some complaints about same day appointments, so I'm going to guess that a day in advance is good.

Let me know if you have other thoughts.

later that same week.  And in both cases, was quickly approved with the info I'd provided & had a successful meeting within a couple of days.

setting up a session to ask her if she sees women. So far I am hitting about a 90% response rate. I don't know if that's normal or I'm just lucky. Perhaps I have a high success rate because I really do need to ask this before committing to filling out forms and submitting references, and the providers realize that and reply accordingly.  

If I don't get a reply within a week I will follow up with one more email, asking the provider if she got my first one. This usually gets things moving again, since the first email could have been lost in cyberspace or wound up in her junk mail box. If I get no answer to the second email, then I write her off and move on.

in advance of when you want to see the provider.  Don't use the words "pre-screen".  Simply say "I would like to see you this Friday afternoon at 4pm for a 1-hr. incall date.  My references are X & Y or my screening information is FIRST LAST and I work for the Z Company.  My phone no. is 999-555-1212."

Providers want to know when and for how long you want to see them and know that they will be safe while in your company.  Otherwise, you are considered a time-waster

...newbie friendly in their profile. Some will still want more info if you don't have references but there are some that will take your P411 membership as sufficient. I know P411 has a prescreening option but many of the providers here say they don't really use it. I've also read here that using their e-mail to contact them once you have viewed their P411 account rather than use the P411 appointment request feature is best. I hope some providers will chime in on that.

I usually make contact anywhere from three days to a week prior to the date and time I'm requesting. How they screen will effect how much time they need. If it's your first contact with them give it a few days. Once you've seen them less time should be required.  P411 ladies can "ok" you on that site. Once you have some "ok's" things should get easier. Many mongers here say with a few "ok's" they no longer are asked for references or personal info.

I've only e-mailed when I was getting ready to make an appointment. For busy/popular providers I've booked 3 weeks in advance just to make sure I could get the date and time I wanted. That didn't seem problematic because I was setting a date. The longest I went for a response was 3 days.

Tobi is a great example, she has a pretty rigorous screening process that she takes very seriously...great for both parties IMO. I knew exactly what she needed and how she likes to handle new clients, so I followed he requirements to the letter, it was painless and might I say it paid off big time. Make it your business to know how a lady takes on new clients and things will go much more smoothly. As to the ones you had seen already, who knows? Blow it off and move on.

If so, that could be the heart of your issue.
Find a P411 lady who is specifically newbie friendly and ask for a date on a specifiic day and time

Thank you all!

The way to go, it seems, is to make an actual appointment and lead times depend on the particular lady.

The pre-screen button on P411 kind of led me astray. Like I mentioned, I thought that was the right way to go about it, but it makes sense that it could end up as wasted effort if an appointment isn't setup.

Special thanks to the ladies who replied. It's always good to hear your side.

BTW: I'm not a newbie newbie. I do have some okays, so that should help too