I get the impression that incalls are preferred by providers is that true? I have a fear of short stay hotels as that's were LE would do a sting ? But that's were a lot of in calls seem to be based on the two providores I am trying to see. Ideally I would like to meet in a nice 3+ start hotel your typical business friendly spot.... Is that uncommon?

In the first place, provider preference (if any) is fairly well split between in-call and out-call, so if you decide that you want one or the other, then concentrate on gals who offer what you want.
 

I share your concerns about small seedy hourly hotels, but I think the gals using them are more bottom of the barrel ones so save up to see some higher class gals.   The ones I see stay at at least 3 star, and more often 4 star hotels.