It nice to let them know that you are going to use them for a reference.  I think from lady to lady it varies as to how they feel  about it.

I don't give them out. I don't say squat to anyone, that is my policy, its not about losing business, its just my lips are sealed and any of my records for that matter, for their protection, from their SO, le, whatever. There is someone else I am sure they will get a referral from. Its just not my style. Subsequently, its hard for me to get reviews, because a lot of these individuals don't write them, they are very low profile, and they don't like to share, lol.

Many ladies require references as part of their screening process.  It is a great way for a lady to stay safe.  You should only use a lady as a reference under the following circumstances:

1.  YOU contact her in advance and ask to use her as a reference.
2.  You have seen her within six months.  Don't use a lady you saw two year ago.  Many things have changed in two years and that reference just isn't very strong.
3.  Don't give any personal information you may know about a lady trying to "impress" the new lady that you had a comfort level with the other lady. For example, "You can contact Jane Doe she lives at 55 Sunshine Lane".  
4.  It isn't necessary to give 10 references!  One or two for starters is good!  Giving a reference list as long as your grocery list is tacky.
5.  Don't over use a reference.  Once you see a lady, it is fine to use her as a reference with her permission a couple of times. (Within a reasonable amount of time) If you would like to continue to use her as a reference, you should continue to see her to keep that reference current.  


Sabra