Made my first appointment, including time at a club and then some private time. There will be a cab or subway ride in the middle. This means adding various rates together. I know what the total should be but i'm nervous about being on the same page. My understanding was that I shouldn't discuss rates in email especially if they're on her web site. When's the right time and what's the right way to verify things?

When you hear "don't talk about rates" what is really meant is don't discuss rates and sexual service. Don't ask "How much is a bbbj?" But you can ask "How much is an hour of your time?" When rates are clearly stated on ads and websites there is also no need to ask, and you shouldn't if it is a straight one hour date etc., but it sounds like you are doing something outside her normal posted rates. It is way more important to be very clearon expectations before the date, than to have confusion about rates that could become a huge issue at the time of the date.

 In your case you could say something like, "Am I correct in assuming the total donation (for public time, private time, and travel time) will be xxx?"

If she has no rate posted for multi-hour dates, you should ask her 'How much for say 3 hours of your time' or for however many hours you are expecting to spend with her.  Not sure I follow you when you said 'adding various rates together'.  

Swim

She had different rates posted for private time and public time, and that is why he is adding together various rates.

END OF MESSAGE

never ever state a specific amount for a set amount of time.

If I finished that question by saying "$800", but only to find out later from the provider that she would have only charged me "$650" for that fun filled evening. I just screwed myself over $150 that could have been spent elsewhere.

Always ask the provider how much is for so-so amount of time? Make the provider give you the answer instead of you giving the answer.
 

Basically I said "I realize I was ambiguous about timing. I'm thinking x time at club, and y time after. I'm not sure how to treat the travel time since it could vary." She was great about it and said not to worry if we went over because of travel time.

What an experience -- but I'll save that for a review