So.. I have a cell phone and email at home and work, as well as private email.

I'd like to contact some escorts, but afraid to death of getting caught by my wife, who would NOT understand. Ya I know what I'm doing... but I need more than one woman in my life. bottom line.

so... is there an app that hides information or manages communication with escorts for iphone? Or some advice on how to have a relationship with escorts in a way that is not easily catchable by wife? Buy a pay by minute phone maybe?

Thanks....

-- Modified on 7/25/2011 5:49:48 PM

i'm married and try to be as discreet as possible but I can be pretty reckless and careless with my hobbying.  one provider recently said to me that i want to get caught; i think she may be right.  its a little bit of a bitch way to go about it but maybe it is the best way for me to get out of a sexless marriage.

Main newb page upper right hand corner under the life preserver.  Next scroll back 4 or 5 pages on this board.  There have been a number of threads recently about phones.  You can search topics on all boards by using the search feature as well.

Let me start with this - some of this is 100% how your relationship and your life works. If you work a "9 to 5" job and your wife is all over you with "where are you" when you're out of the house then it's a matter of time before you get busted. I have friends who want to monger but can't. They can't go to Home Depot for 30 minutes without 5 texts from their wife.

However, if you have a flexible job schedule and a wife who doesn't need to know where you are every second of the day, or doesn't ask you 10 questions every time you come home then you can be ok. I have such a job and wife - flexible schedule, wife who doesn't grill me.

A pre-paid phone is a must. If you already have one, great. I wouldn't do shit on my iphone. If you have to write something down, like an address or phone number, mix up the numbers. 123 Main St becomes 321. If the last 4 of the number is 6584 then it's 4856.  Get a Trac phone at Walmart - cash, and buy a card with minutes, in cash.

Don't break your routine and don't lie about a location. If you're meeting an escort 20 miles north, don't say you're having lunch at a place 10 miles south. What if someone hits you? Traffic ticket? Car breaks down?

The key, lie as little as possible. NEVER include anyone in on a lie your wife knows, like saying you're having a meeting or lunch with a friend of co-worker. Don't stop having sex with your wife or reduce the amount of sex. Get prepared that one night she might want sex after you've seen an escort. If you "never" say no to sex then you'd better be prepared to perform. The name of the game is don't get her radar up. If her radar is up, you're toast. She can slip a GPS under your car seat and it's over.

When looking for an escort, try to find one as close to you as possible. You really want to avoid driving 45 minutes each way. It's easy to disappear for an hour - harder for 3.

My "MO" is the gym. I go to the gym 4 times per week and I make sure I'm there for around 90 minutes. When I want to hook up, I log into the gym (they scan my card) then I leave. I'll also say I have business meetings with people she doesn't know.

Most pros already know this but make sure when you meet she doesn't use anything scented. Leave EVERYTHING locked in your car - watch, wallet, etc....everything except cash for the session.

ONLY see well reviewed girls. I can't stress this enough if you're married. Seeing a girl who hasn't been reviewed, especially if you're married is a tremendous risk. Pay for quality. Quality escorts know the drill with married men - they'll never call or text you.

You've already had good advise.
Hobby email.  Hobby phone.  I clear all off the hobby phone but others use codes.  If you can afford to play, you can afford the phone.
There is real risk in your computer.  Be very careful.  Scan for spyware, viruses, tracking software.  Some browsers are more secure than others.   There are programs to overwrite deleted data.  Do not use work computers or internet access to access adult sites unless you own the company.   Never use the computer for adult sites when someone might walk in on you.
Do not use your CC anywhere you are not supposed to be.
Never use another person to cover for you.  This is a secret life & outside of this board, you take it to your grave.  You never tell your buddy, best friend, brother, wife, etc.   You must prevent them from suspecting...  because if they suspect, they will track you.  No one wants a Private Eye following them.  

When I started, I promised myself I'd not do anything stupid...  as I gained experience and read more here...  I realized I needed to be more careful.  I was lucky...  some are not.  Some have been discovered before they every got to the first meeting!   Luck is NOT a plan.

Reading the self help section & reading back on this board is free...  and you have so much to learn.
skb

if you want to get caught and end the marriage, go see a lawyer. He/she will tell you that you are way better off to just end it, rather than do something stupid, get caught and let her be the injured party. Unless you somehow think that will put her in a more accommodating mood.

Let's see - divorce hurt and sad woman, or divorce angry, betrayed and vengeful woman? Not such a tough call since you can sell the first but you are cooked with the second.

zig

I could not use the gym as a cover.  Other guys can.  You must find your own free time.  The cover activities must be real.   There are lots of sports & activities.   Devoluping some freedom to come & go without being questioned is important.   Maybe you spend hours in the lumber yards looking for materials for a project.   So long as there is a project, who's to know.

Getting caught at this activity when you're married and especially if you have kids can have severe consequences. Your wife will likely tell her family and yours and you're "seeing prostitutes" and if that happens, your life will never be the same again. Your kids will know the reason for the divorce is because "daddy was seeing hookers."

If you don't care, get divorced.

When I'm on my computer I use Chrome and go to incognito mode when searching anything hobby related. This keeps my regular search history available but won't keep a history of anything in the incognito browser.

Remembering the small stuff is what's tough. It's a gas or coffee receipt. It's forgetting to throw away the directors to her place/hotel.

If you're like me and feel a tab bit guilty when you get home, it's hard to act "normal" sometimes. If you understand the psychology of lying, a trap is to offer too many details when you get back home. In your mind, the more detailed you are about your "business lunch" or "golf outing" the more it proves you're not lying.

Avoid that. For me, that less I talk the better everything is.

I carry around "Portable Firefox" on my USB in case I'm stranded someplace with a crappy or unfriendly browser. I hardly ever use it.

I think it runs off your USB and leaves NO TRACE on the host computer whatsoever. It doesn't need to access system files. I think it's meant to run on computers (libraries, internet cafes, etc.) where everything is locked down (no saving files or data; no changing settings; "idiot proof"; hobby proof?) so the public users don't screw them up.

Has anyone used that as their hobby browser?  

REMINDER!!! DON'T WALK AWAY AND FORGET YOUR USB!!

Because I often have to drive at least a couple of hours to hobby, I was having trouble finding excuses to be away for said hobbying. So I developed a new "hobby"- its called fishing! I dropped some cash on the appropriate equipment, bought a few books on the subject so I could talk a good game, and fish in her presence at least once a week at our nearby lake house. Therefore, its no great jump to expect me to go looking for additional fishing "holes" elsewhere, all of which are, strangely, a couple of hours away The funny thing is I actually enjoy my new hobby, just not quite as much as the old hobby...

Never used a portable Firefox, but I have used a portable/usb Linux that I know runs in RAM only. I discovered it while working with the military, It is what they recommend for their users when traveling to check email without leaving anything critical behind.

I have certain businesses in my GPS...  that I would have reason to stop at.  Some of them are within sight of a hotel.  Some hotels I have listed because I attend seminars there.  
Because I don't keep data on my hobby phone, I must get internet & look up the number before I head off.  If I write a note, address or phone...  I don't write her name just the location or number.  Sometimes I trash it in the room or if I'm paranoid, a public receptical within the hotel.  
I clear my hobby phone call log before driving away & shut the phone off.

Well said. Thanks for sharing the years of experience.

You could buy a cheap "burner" phone from a Radio Shack.  Of course, then you have to keep that one hidden.  Cuz if the wife sees the extra phone, hoo boy.  I tried using a burner but found it too much hassle.

Maybe I'm lucky but I've found that providers do not dial you back.  The one exception is where you called like 5 min ago and left no message, and they call back.  I think providers deal with a very high volume of bullshit calls, and they have better things to do than to save numbers and call them back to cause trouble.

Of course you can always leave the phone on vibrate.  Better yet, just make it a policy that you always screen calls from unknown numbers, and let your wife know about this.  So it goes to voicemail and you deal with it later.

Another thing you can do if you're really worried, is create contacts on your phone for the providers you've dialled, and give the contacts names that sound like annoyances.  For example, I'm a software programmer and I get recruiter calls trying to get me jobs.  So i might create a contact for a provider with the name "Apex Tech Recruiter".  So when the phone rings from a provider at the wrong time, you look at the incoming name, which you show to your wife, and say "that's a nuisance call, I don't want to take that."  Of course it's a little tougher to explain away those recruiters who are calling at 10pm on Saturday.