Hi,

I'm East Indian, and a newbie.. not the best combination, I suppose! I've been a basic (infrequent observer) member at TER for over 2 years, but never really took the plunge due to a myriad of reasons: Schedule, reluctance to give out personal information, fear of getting caught, shyness etc. to name a few.

Anyway, I observed few providers who explicitly stated (in their profile or on the board) that they are not open to seeing Indian clients. Do Indians have a bad reputation with providers? If yes, I'm curious as to why? Is it because of physical appearance/race, personality, hygiene, behavior or some other reason(s) I'm missing? Is it going to be difficult finding providers who would see me? I would like to start this hobby sooner or later, and want to be prepared for any eventuality!  

Thanks in advance

In the little less than 2 years I've been doing this I've seen around 25 different ladies.  Being Indian has never been an issue with any of them.  Every once in a while I'll get asked about my ethnicity during screening to which I'll truthfully answer Indian-American.  Never a problem.

I'll also note that I've never seen a "no Indians allowed" policy in any prospective provider's ad or website while doing my research.  Perhaps you're just looking in the wrong places?  Avoid BP and stick to well reviewed providers on TER.

-- Modified on 9/20/2016 1:12:29 AM

I haven't seen any ladies websites specifically say no Indians, however I have seen some posts on these boards were ladies have said they prefer not to see them, something about bad hygiene and their attitude towards women, treating them like second class citizens.
So YES, If I were you I would just tell them so there are no surprises or disappointments which would ruin the session

I would suggest letting a provider know during screening just to avoid any surprises for either of you. Also, being up front and honest tends to set a good tone. Just my opinion.

Indians tend to be uncut, raising hygiene issues with some women and then there are some cultural issues, (perceived misogyny) and then I suppose there is just blatant racism on the part of some people/providers.

As long as you are clean and respectful, prerequisites for men of ALL races, you shouldn't have a problem, but yes I believe you will on occasion run into a woman who for one reason or another will not see you because of your race. Fortunately, unlike younger black men for example, I doubt you will run into this issue too often.  

Read these boards for long enough and you will end up smacking your own head about just how "out there" some people here are about perpetuating and even inventing new racial stereotypes about people who look different from themselves. You can't fix stupid, but good behavior is it's own reward.  

It really is a shame these questions even need to be asked, but you can't just put your head in the sand and pretend that the problem doesn't exist, even if the problem is not as bad as one might believe.

I know many people who are ancestrally from the Indian sub-continent of Asia (but they are from all over the world: India, central Africa, south Africa, Singapore, England, and - would you believe it? - the USA). In appearance, they range from vanilla to espresso (see color chart below). Maybe some Providers do think "Indian" is at one end of the color spectrum or the other? Among the "Indians" I know, I could do a very rough color-coded sorting: the light skinned Indians tend to be X and the dark skinned Indians tend to be Y, and so on.

As I'm babbling on, I realize that I really don't have a clue why individual Providers might have an "Indian" restriction.  

The only valid reason I can think of is that many ethnic Providers do not see others of their own ethnicity on the chance that there be mutual acquaintances. E.g., some Korean Providers say, "No Koreans" because of the close-knit Korean communities in some regions. (A K-girl working in Manhattan (NYC) might live openly in K-town in Queens. Some K-guy in Queens might not want to play in his own backyard and scoot into Manhattan, instead. "No Koreans!" is to be on the safe side that your neighbor from K-town Queens doesn't show up at your workplace in Manhattan.)

I think you'll find plenty of great opportunities out there even after subtracting the few with restrictions. Good luck

Speaking only for myself, and the majority of providers with whom I've discussed such things over the years: YES.  
I really and truly hate to make generalizations or to stereotype in any way and I hesitated quite awhile prior to writing this.

But the truth is that most  Indian clients I've had have been a problem in one way or another and wound up on my DNS list after just one visit.  Nowadays, they usually land there before we even meet.   Sometimes it is poor hygiene.   When I think back on the men who've been not only the most odorous, but also the most reluctant to shower, brush their teeth, etc. when asked: Yup, except for one guy, they were all Indian.  
(That one guy was a regular of a former agency who earned the nickname Stinky and is a funny story for another time lol.)

Appearance?  Nah, not for me.  Well, wait a minute, I'll take that back!  There have been a few who had really gross, way-too-long TOENAILS which I found completely repulsive.  So that could go under either "hygiene" or "appearance", I suppose. :shrug:

Personality & Behavior?  This is the important factor for me, and again, YES.  
Now, I personally have never felt at all threatened or fearful for my physical safety with any Indian man whom I either met or with whom I corresponded without meeting.  
The most apt word that comes to mind is DIFFICULT.  

I've only met a handful in the past year or so, but with each one there was some noteworthy issue.  Most often it's not respecting my boundaries, making it clear he only wants the absolute most bang for his buck (treating the provider like an object rather than a human being), and just plain inconsiderate words & actions.   Not the worst offenses, to be sure, but not people I'd like to see again.  

And this is not counting the dozen or so who scheduled then cancelled with short notice, or once they were screened then began asking explicit questions, made crude negotiation attempts, or pulled a NCNS.  

THEN there's those who don't even make it past screening because they're either already blacklisted or they immediately rub me the wrong way.  It would take all day to list the many examples, but it typically boils down to inappropriate comments, an overall disrespectful vibe, or demanded something I don't offer.  

So I'll admit that when someone contacts me and either tells me he's Indian, or his name does it for him, my guard goes up just a little bit more than usual.  

BUT!  I don't refuse to see Indian men just because they're Indian.  Nope.  
As already mentioned, very few make it past my screening & scheduling to actually keep their date without incident.

I apologize if this is harsh, or if I sound at all cavalier about it, but what I'm sharing is completely true.  I honestly wish it weren't.  

Please bear in mind that my experiences & opinions are uniquely my own, and although some providers have shared similar stories with me, I certainly don't believe ALL providers have encountered the same nor that their reactions would mirror my mine.

The gist of what I'm trying to convey is that such a policy might be based more on experiences than "reputation"

 
Now, certain ladies DO refuse to see Indian men based solely upon stereotypes, generalizations, and profiling.  

Some believe that "all Indian men reek of curry" and won't see them for that reason alone.  (Seriously.)

Others, even having never met an Indian client, have ideas about their attitudes toward women or how they might behave in-session either from other providers , what they've observed in civvie social settings, or whatever the Long Island Medium told them.  I don't know, but yes, unfortunately these decisions are not always formed from personal experiences.  

 
Whew.....  oh, and lest you think that I'm saying I find Indian clients are worse than any other ethnic group?  Nope, definitely not.  

I chanced upon a P411 profile of a lady who specifically called out Indian and middle eastern along with AA. Dont remember who!
I guess there are a few bad apples among us who fit the description you mentioned. Sadly, they are ruining chances for others like me.
Thanks for the advice though!

quote]I haven't seen any ladies websites specifically say no Indians, however I have seen some posts on these boards were ladies have said they prefer not to see them, something about bad hygiene and their attitude towards women, treating them like second class citizens.  
 So YES, If I were you I would just tell them so there are no surprises or disappointments which would ruin the session.