Newbie - FAQ

Helpful Links and Information for the NEWBIE!!
MichaelCA 12 Reviews 7305 reads
posted

Below are some links to past useful threads that have appeared on TER. Please go through them, they will help you get past some of the easier to answer questions and let you learn from other experiences.

-- Modified on 7/24/2004 8:43:43 AM

Welcome to the TER Newbie Discussion Board.

We're here to help you but please work with us. Many members of the TER community stop by here to answer Newbie questions. The more seasoned members tend to get frustrated when the same questions are asked over and over again.

The pages of this board contain a wealth of information. You're wasting a great resource by not checking them out.

Please take the time to familiarize yourself with the FIND MESSAGE link available on all TER discussion boards. The "Find Message" link is located at the bottom left on the front page of each TER discussion board. You must search each board separately but you can search each board by key word, message author, or a date range.

For instance, this board is full of posts regarding abbreviations and acronyms. We really shouldn’t have a number of posts each week asking for such definitions as

BBBJ
BBBJTC
DATY
DFK

Using the “FIND MESSAGE” tool, enter a keyword such as 'acronym' or 'ymmv'. You'll find what you’re looking for and more.

The "Find Message" link is located at the bottom left on the front page of each TER discussion board. You must search each board separately but you can search each board by key word, message author, or a date range.

In the SEARCH FOR box, type in a relevent term.

In the FROM box, change 30 to a large number like 999.

We're happy to answer your questions but the helpers on this board tend to get frustrated when certain questions are repeated again and again. There's a wealth of information already available here. You're wasting a great resource by not checking it out

Click on the link and be sure to read replies to the list for any additions.

If you'd like to add to this list, please click on the attached link and reply to the original thread. If you reply to the original thread, I don't have to copy your reply every time I move this list back to page 1.

The only method we have to add to the list is to reply to the original thread. It would be helpful if others could do the same when a situation like this comes up by adding a reply to the original thread in this form {term}={definition} in the subject line.

Please read all of the following guidelines carefully before posting an ad on TER discussion boards.

1) Independent providers may post one ad per week (any 7-day period).  When visiting another city, you may also post one ad per week on that board to announce your visit.  Include the dates of your visit in the subject line of your ad.

Escort agencies may post one ad per week per region they serve.

Please help us keep it fair by reporting violations of the limit to the local moderator of the board on which it appears or to Girl Next Door.

2) You may place your ad on the regional board (including the Other Cities board) that is closest to the area you service or are touring.  

Porn Stars may advertise on the Porn Star board, and Transexuals are encouraged to advertise on the Transexual board.

Unsolicited ads are not allowed on other TER discussion boards, including the National Discussion Board.  Providers MAY reply to ISOs (In Search Of) with their links.

3) Your ad must include a link that goes to your website, to your TER review profile, or directly to your ad on an escort mall.  Agencies may link to their own websites only.

Any ad that does not provide a valid, working link will be deleted.  The link must work when the moderator reads it, so please check it carefully when posting.

Your contact information must be on the site you link to.

You may not link to a provider ad that is hosted on another escort review site.

If you link to your own website, whether you are an independent or an agency, that website must be listed in the TER Site Reviews, http://theeroticreview.com/site_listing/index.asp .  Read more about how you can join here:  http://theeroticreview.com/site_listing/tips.asp .  To add your website, click here:  http://theeroticreview.com/site_listing/submit_site.asp?category_id=27&city_id=1

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By participating in the discussions on TER discussion boards, you can greatly increase your visibility and give potential clients the opportunity to get to know you better.  You may include your link in messages you contribute to any TER discussion board, and that does not count toward your ad limit.  In fact, you are encouraged to include your link, because it helps everyone get to know you better.  Just please make those linked messages meaningful, entertaining or helpful contributions.

Thank you,
Girl Next Door
TER Personal Mail:  Girl Next Door

Copy of original post by 'loverofwomen'

Those of you who know me from these boards know that I've seen a number of providers and have formed lasting friendships with some of these ladies.  One of the dearest of these friends fell on hard times around October of 2003, so I offered her the use of my spare bedroom and pretty much the run of my house.  In February, my friend got back on her feet and was able to move into her own place.  She and I are still very close and remain in contact.

While my friend lived with me, she continued to operate as a provider, and as such, gave me the opportunity to see things from a whole new perspective.  I thought my observations and insights might be appropriate here on the Newbie Board, because having an appreciation of what's happening on the other end of the phone or internet connection may help some hobbyists be more understanding and patient.  This can only lead to smoother and happier relationships with our providers, resulting in a win/win situation.

I had no idea of the effort a good provider puts forth in securing an appointment and providing the quality of service we hobbyists desire.  Many of these efforts are obvious; the hair, the make-up, the clothes and so on.  But what's not readily apparent is the ratio of contacts to actual appointments.  The amount of work involved is easily equivalent to a full-time job.

The number of dead-end calls is staggering.  Many are from guys who just enjoy the thrill of speaking to a provider, with no real intent of using her services.  It was normal for my friend to spend several hours a day with multiple IM sessions open (some with a web cam, so she had to look her best) carrying on simultaneous conversations.  All the while, each phone call and IM message had to be treated as a potential client.  No matter how tired my friend was, or how poorly she may have felt, when she was on the phone or on-line, she had to come off as bright, energetic and sensuous.

So often, I would watch my friend develop an appointment over several contacts -- maybe even over several days -- and get herself all prepared to go, just to have the client cancel at the last second.  I was amazed at how often this occurred.

The screening process was another fascinating area.  The dangers out there are sobering; law enforcement and disease, of course.  But the possibility of walking into a hotel room occupied by some psycho was always at the forefront.  My friend had become pretty good at her screening techniques.  But there were a number of nights she'd come home visibly shaken and I would just hold her and let her sob.

We hobbyists have to remember that our providers are first and foremost people.  Most are women who are vulnerable and sensitive.  They have the same dreams, hopes and fears as do most people.  They love.  They cry.  They laugh and they hurt.  They need affection and belonging as much as any of us.  They've chosen a vocation in which there can be a great deal of emotional exposure, but in which they must remain detached and professional.  They know if they falter in this detachment, they risk terrible pain.

So guys, when you deal with a provider, be a gentleman.  More importantly, be a gentle man.  Be patient with the screening and don't take things personally.  

Be on time.  Don't make an appointment unless you're as sure as you can be that you're going to keep it.  And if you can't keep your appointment, let the provider know as quickly as possible.  

Within reason, do what you can to make the provider feel appreciated and special.  Yes, you're the customer, but some kind words and some simple courtesy can have no effect but to make your time more enjoyable.

Do your research.  Be certain the provider you've chosen is willing to carry on the activities you have in mind.  Be sure of the provider's rules and stay within those guidelines.  Be clear on the amount of the donation and how the provider would like it handled.

As difficult as this may be, remember the emotions you're feeling are biological in nature -- they're not love.  Don't fall into the trap of becoming fixated on a provider; it scares them and makes you miserable.  This is supposed to be fun -- that's why they call it a hobby.  If it gets out of hand, lives can be ruined.

Have the good form to avoid speaking about sex or asking explicit questions when you're setting things up with a provider.  Instead, use resources like TER's reviews and discussion boards to determine what to expect.

As you venture out into this most enjoyable of hobbies, keep these observations in mind and everyone will have a good time.

1. All ads must include a TER approved link at the end of the post. An approved link will point to one of three places: A TER reviewed website (you must have a TER Banner or Site Review logo on the first or second page), your TER review profile or an ad on an Escort Mall. Any ad posts not meeting this requirement will be deleted.

2. You may post links at the end of your posts, as long as they meet the same criteria as the link for an ad.

3. You may post only one ad every 7 days. You may post clarifications and reminders under the same thread as the original ad without breaking the 7 day rule.

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