Hi.  I'm new to this site although I have been mostly at AMPs.  I jumped in basically and tried a local provider in my area and she was terrific.  Very freindly and what a great time!

But I know there's certain etiquette and types of clients that providers like.  I'm no model material but what is that providers like in their clients?  Do you enjoy visits with some guys?  Does it make you happy when your guy gets real excited by you?  Do you look for hygiene, friendliness..etc?

Just trying to catch a little glimpse into your world and enjoy services offered.  But I want the experience to be mutually enjoyable even if it's for different reasons.

Thanks in advance.

Unloved

Perfect client:

Is willing to provide the necessary information for screening that makes him and us comfortable so we can all be safe
Posses impecable hygiene and is an absolute delight to be around whether in person, phone or intimate time!
Doesn't talk negatively about women/other providers/agencies
Dresses for the occasion
Shows up on time
Cancels only in case of extreme emergencies (not due to superficial excuses) and does not flake out
Treats our girls like ladies and appreciates the time spent with them
Never overstays
Never negotiates
Never discusses services or uses explicit language on the phone or email
Always has a great attitude towards us and people in general
Understand the dynamics of this world and educates himself on the hobby, he does his research and selects a provider/agency based on his preferences.
Openly discuses any concerns that he may have and gives us feedback in a objective and respectful way so we can do things bett

I think it's pretty universal that us ladies just ask that our clients be polite, respectful and clean. Those are the biggest three.  

For me personally, you get bonus points for a good sense of humor, a laid-back attitude, and some confidence. That said, as long as you're not smelly, rude, or overtly awkward, then you're cool with me.  

P.S. One final thing: it's a pet peeve of mine when someone contacts me asking me about things that are very early outlined in my ads/website. You'd be astounded how many contacts I get like that, so when a gent actually takes the time to read through my info, it really makes him stand out.

Sometimes we have to cancel when its NOT an "extreme emergency."  

Sometimes we don't show up on time.  

Sometimes we are not a "absolute delight" to be around, but just "ok" to be around.  

NOBODY "always" has a great attitude.  

Sorry to break this to you but your statement that a "perfect client is not a difficult concept to achieve" is nonsense. You don't have ANY perfect clients or ANY perfect escorts.

It's not that being perfect is difficult to achieve, its impossible to achieve.

Just my 2 cents.

Peace

Is there ever any jealousy when a client rotates between various providers

I do t think she meant that if  we are not allowed to screw up here and there.  She is not saying it would make you a BAD client by not striving for those.  I think what she is saying is that's the ideal.  I have my ideas of an ideal provider but I'm sure there are bad days too.

But it's nice it have some idea of benchmarks at least to see what's important to them.  It may be entirely different than what we think is important.  2 different wave lengths

And I am always making suggestions about other ladies that may suit your preferences because I get referred by other ladies as well. Jealousy shouldn't exist here neither between ladies or ladies and gents. It is all about making sure that you have a great time with whoever you choose to spend your time with

The OP mentions "perfection" twice in their post. I thought that was a bit odd.

It's also no one else's business as to why someone cancels. When I get cancelled on by a girl, I have no interest in knowing the reason. I only ask that she is professional and lets me know with as much notice as she can.

People can cancel for any reason they wish. What is an "extreme emergency" to one person can be a very minor reason to someone else.

Some newbs get jitters just before a session. Most manage to get past those jitters and go thru with the session and some don't, and cancel last minute. Canceling for this reason is perfectly acceptable, imo, but I wouldn't list that reason as an "extreme emergency." In other words, not all cancellations need to be emergencies to be valid.

She also speaks in absolutes in several parts of the post. I found that odd as well. You get in trouble when one uses words like "always" and "never."

And mentioning that the guys should "always have a great attitude to people in general" is absurd. Its none of their business how you act with others, only that her girls are treated well.  

Imo, she tailored her response to what fits her business model best, not necessarily what is in the newb/hobbyists best interests.

I dont want to overstate the point either. It certainly isn't the end of the world what she posted but I just thought a little balance was necessary, thats all.

Some, like yourself, may disagree. No problem with that here. Differences of opinions are good things.  

Good luck to you and stay safe bro!

-- Modified on 7/8/2014 12:00:08 AM

I have found that I keep who I see to myself.  Now I do write reviews and have been questioned by a provider or two why I saw someone. However, certain providers do understand that  variety is why some clients get into this.  So as always there's no one answer to your question.  

(This is from my personal blog. Enjoy!)

What separates a decently successful hobbyist (sometimes gets the girl he wants, strikes out as often as he hits, expends a lot of cell minutes trying to hook up)... from the hobbyist who quietly and confidently enjoys the sensual delights of his absolute favorites?

After years in this delicate dance, I've seen the good, the bad and absolutely unforgivable. In the process, I've learned a few things myself. So for the fellows who'd like to improve their average, I'm offering the following observations. May they help you score the big Kahuna, whoever she may be.

1. Highly Effective Hobbyists PLAN AHEAD. This is especially crucial when a lady's on tour. After I've advertised on my blog for 3-4 weeks, Eros for a week and announced on TER several times in advance of my arrival, I still get initial calls on the very last night of a tour. To my great amusement, these spontaneous souls are shocked that my time is already booked.

Would you wait for the night of the Prince concert to call TicketMaster? OK, then.

2. Highly Effective Hobbyists OFFER THEIR CREDENTIALS. If I don't know you, a one-line email stating, "Hi, I'm Joe, Are you available tonight?" is going straight into the trash. The reservation form on my website has been crafted to get just what I need from you-- no more, no less. And since many of us ladies also offer easy screening shortcuts through Date-Check, RS2K or Preferred 411, there's really no excuse for the old "I didn't realize you needed to know who I am" ploy.

Would you let a nameless, potentially nefarious stranger into your bedroom? OK, maybe if her tits were big enough. But we girls have tits of our own.

3. Highly Effective Hobbyists DO THEIR RESEARCH. Nothing charms a lady more than the fellow who asks her to reiterate every piece of information that's already on her website, her ad, her TER profile, or her blog.

Even the MILFs among us don't have the time or the inclination to spoon-feed you. After all, aren't you the boys who sent a man to the moon?

4. Highly Effective Hobbyists LEAVE THEIR EGO AT THE DOOR. We know you're a big man at work. Leagues of lowly-paid minions cower at your presence. But lording it over the lady you've selected for some very intimate companionship is simply bad form. Of the dozen or so clients whom I truly detested and will never see again, the main common denominator was arrogance.

Yes, we're here to please. But you know the saying.... if Momma ain't happy, then nobody's getting the goods.

5. Highly Effective Hobbyists LEAVE US WANTING MORE. You wouldn't linger at the party till the exhausted hosts stagger off to bed. So when you're enjoying the lady's company, be equally aware that when the party's over, it's over.

We want to feel regretful that you had to leave after only an hour... not remember that we had to drag your ass to the door after you camped out for an extra 30 minutes, sloooowly tying your shoes. That's what loafers are for.

6. Highly Effective Hobbyists LIKE WOMEN. As odd as it may sound, some of our clients resent us, look down on us, and simply don't have our best interests at heart. These are the fellows who quiz us on our private lives, ask our real names, disclose confidential details to other parties, or gossip about us to their other dates.

It wasn't attractive in high school, and you can't fit into those pants anymore, either.

7. Highly Effective Hobbyists KNOW IT'S JUST A HOBBY. Yes, we adore being your girlfriend for an hour or two... and when you're genuinely nice, we often have very fond feelings for your presence in our lives. So let's agree... we won't fall in love with you, call you at home, get our feelings hurt when you see another lady, or boil your rabbit.

Do the same by us, and we'll be good.

I really appreciate the provider insight.

Thank yo

There is jealousy among some providers.  It would be wonderful if all providers shared your attitude, but unfortunately, it isn't gonna happen.  I think it's less likely to happen between guys than gals.

Swim

JD, there's nothing wrong with not wanting to be a dick. She gave basic, decent human being advice. It's not tailored to her business model, it's just common sense. Be nice and keep it simple, what a concept!!

Eta:

-- Modified on 7/8/2014 6:30:58 AM

but many responses you post have the word "we" in them, as if you are speaking for all the providers. Sounds like you are speaking in absolutes.

Fwiw, I think you should just speak for yourself b/c you really have no idea what all the other ladies do/want. As swim pointed out, there is jealousy among providers.  

I have seen it and heard many of them gripe about petty jealousies over the years. Anyyone with experience on the hobbyist side would tell you the same thing.  

Many women would also affirm that assertion.

Some get it, others are assholes who haven't figured out that a good BJ is better job security than their bullshit.  

I'm dealing with one now who continues to encourage a client I dumped to harass me. Why? Who knows. Maybe she can't get the job security under control with her fucked up teeth, maybe she just doesn't realize that some girls are doing well enough to get rid of ridiculous clients, maybe she's just weird like him. All I know is that I'm apparently a great match maker cause someone's gonna get what they want out of that whole situation.  

Anyways. How do you avoid jealous girls? Just don't tell them about your business. This isn't the place where you need to keep us clued in on your whereabouts all the time, and for the majority of girls, they really don't care to hear about all that anyways since you are, after all, now here with her.

This is spot on. Underneath all the "RAH ASSHOLE HOBBYIST WHYYYYY!!" posts that don't come across as eloquently as this, there is the simple request that we both try to make sure you have fun

but for any of us who have been here a while, it does exist in with some providers.  There are usually always exceptions to every theory or rule; everything isn't black & white in this world.  Most providers understand that guys seek variety.  It is the good providers that welcome a guy back for a repeat visit after he has seen another lady.

Yeah but what about when you ask for a reference.  The only reason to do that is to seek other providers.  So wouldn't that be a potential trigger for jealousy.

Personally I think it's good business if the client is good.  He will return or at least put a good review up which will draw in other business

If you are THIS condescending by text, I can only imagine you must be a real joy in person.

And I will apologize for all those stupid johns who tried to give you hundreds of dollars an hour on your last night in town. The sheer horror it must send up your spine to get those emails.

And how sweet of you that you wont "boil my rabbit." Wonder why that bizarre and sadistic notion popped into your head? Hmmmm....

You need a LONG break form this biz honey. Your anti-business skills and man hating is well on display.  

I'll spend my hard earned $ on nicer, younger and sweeter girls who don't feel the need to talk down to potential clients

Keep in mind that any "jealousy" among providers has nothing to do with emotional attachment. It's about ego and money.

Sometimes you can figure out which ladies act that way by communicating with other guys.

END OF MESSAGE

I guess it touched on a lot of little considerations in a humorous way. It's a mutual effort to keep the hobby pleasant for everyone, I agree!

I've been lucky in many ways... becoming a successful provider at 40 certainly gave me a little more perspective on the big picture!

Glad you enjoyed it.

Tabu

did it strike ANYBODY else that way?

:-S

-- Modified on 7/8/2014 12:08:48 PM

Hi Unloved,  

For me, what makes a good client is someone I really look forward to seeing again.  But what makes me look forward to seeing someone again?

Friendliness, for one.  If you're kind, friendly and good natured.  That just makes everything better in life. And as a client.

Hygiene is so very important. You can be the sweetest person but if you're stinky and/or have bad breath.  You know how it is.

Chemistry.  You can't fake real chemistry - when sparks fly and passion starts rising up..  Though it's my responsibility to create chemistry by reading your vibe, mood, personality, presence, ect.  When it's there already, well, that's just super hot.

Annale

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He'd turn down a BJ if it was a woman's idea.

make a positive contribution to the community.

even as I agree with much of it.
Sometimes I do pursue last minute dates, but always with a realization that it's much less likely to materialize.
If you called a popular restaurant hoping they had a last minute cancellation, you could easily accept a "sorry, we are all booked up for the evening."  A dissmissive self-indulgent attitude, "how dare you even think you could get a reservation with US with such late notice," I'm less likely react positively to in terms of possible future patronage. (okay, you didn't exactly say this, but my point is, sometimes life happens, and for whatever reason you make a last minute request hoping for the best, nothing wrong with this - if it works out, then its a win-win, if not, then no harm).

Lets just keep things simple and say that both parties should respect each other.
I don't know, I just find this type of list to be a bit too lecturing for my taste.
I'm a very down to earth guy and like ladies to be the same - when I see a list like this it makes me think the lady might be a bit on the controlling judgemental side - rather than the more organic, fun, take things as they come side.
Fair?  Maybe not.  But when I go into a date, I'm going in as an equal ADULT partner, not as a child hoping to impress the teacher.

END OF MESSAGE

Look at the difference between that condescending drivel Tabu put up versus Annalee's post below.  

All things being equal, the average guy would want to see a sweet, friendly and warm provider like Annalee rather than that dark, snarky look down your nose attitude of Tabu.

Any good business does not lecture their clients nor do they talk down to them. They put the client ABOVE themselves, not below. At the very worst they are equals.  

Tabu post seems to view clients as a minor annoyance she has to deal with and make them tow the line. She certainly doesn't come across as happy or fun at all.  

Great post Jst

His posts certainly don't ring of someone "just getting started" but sound more like an experienced monger with his head on straight.  A perfect example of how a "hobbyist" can stand up for himself, not jump through endless hoop, prove he has a spine, but not go so far as to come across as a misogynist.

I am completely with JST on this one, although I agree with much of what TABU has to say, her condescending tone is a complete turn off to me. If I wanted a lecture, I'd get a wife.

Not to be confused with THE (the husband experience) where the man just lies there the whole time and then promptly rolls over and goes to sleep. lol

No but, seriously. The other ladies covered it...good hygiene, respecting her boundaries, paying the full donation,  being pleasant, reading her whole website before requesting an appointment. Those are what makes a good client.

What makes a "preferred" client, the kind that makes us say, "Wow! I REALLY hope he makes another appointment with me!" varies by provider. Tipping doesn't hurt lol. For me, I really like the gents that book appointments longer than an hour. And, the ones that are really good at DATY and really enjoy post-sex cuddling (or pre-2nd pop cuddling). There was this one gent I saw that put the donation in a thank you card and brought flowers, and that just tickled me to death. The more a man goes above and beyond, the more I do too. There's one gentleman I see regularly that continually goes above and beyond, so I like to give him OTC after our appointment is over and I've taken PTO from my day job just to be able to see him. He's just that awesome. I'll be the first to admit that I am unfair and give priority to my regulars/favorites. I guess that makes me kind of unprofessional, but I'm a woman first and a provider second. (Sorry, didn't mean to turn this into a threAD [or a DNS depending on your perspective lol])

So, yeah....stick with the "good client" criteria, and when you find a super duper lady you really like, do some nice little extras for her. It feels good to be nice to people, and it always comes back to you.

END OF MESSAGE

That's good advice.

One thing I'm not sure if is tipping.  I understand the donation is not to be discussed and it is preferred to be placed somewhere obvious but not handed to the provider.

Okay, how does the tip come into play.  Do you just whip out a few more $$ and hand it to the provider?  I have one provider I would like to tip but I have not because I don't want to do something that's offensive.  I also have a date scheduled with a new provider.  I'm anticipating based on reviews that a tip is probably in order.  Is a gift pre-visit enough?

I guess once I have a few regulars things will fall into place.

But thanks in advance.

Everyone on this site is helpful and seems to be very supportive of eachother

Not sure what you read in a review that a "tip is probably in order" b/c it never is. These girls are making a FORTUNE per hour in this biz. You can "tip" them by seeing them again.

Of course the decision is always yours as you are free to hobby any way you please but don't feel a tip is ever necessary or any kind of obligation.

Even the professional gals will tell you the same thing.

If you anticipate giving a tip, just bring the tip with you and keep it separate from the donation. Donation gets laid down immediately, and the tip is left in the bathroom or table when you're fixing to leave.

To be a good client, tipping is not necessary. Just the other things about hygiene, respect, etc.

It is a really nice thing to do though.

Is when I see a new provider who is incredibly underpriced for her market. It doesn't happen often but every once in awhile I'll see someone who is at $$ and could easily get $$$ or more. I'll throw down a tip. It helps when they realize how under priced they are. So when they raise their donations theyl'll grandfather you at good rate.  
 

Ok thanks I'll keep that in mind.

'Dress code' needed for entry to an establishment. Or likewise...lots of businesses (especially very successful ones) have a lot of rules that sound arbitrary and even snobbish, to those who aren't accustomed to or prepared for the procedures needed for entry.

I could see where it might piss off those who do not play the game that way, and who do not believe that they should be told how it is best to play. But the clients she's trying to attract will find it reassuring. It will affirm their belief that THEY are ideal clients, and superior to the rest...they already know the things she is telling them (have known for years), and they would NEVER play that way. It will resonate with them, and those are the men she's trying to attract. It will annoy others, and those men are not her clients and will never be...

It might inform a few, who didn't realize that there was another way to hobby other than hurriedly calling the first name they see and saying, 'Are you available tonight? Thanks, Tom'. If not, at least maybe they won't call HER next time they move down that list. That prevents a waste of both their time, and hers. Mission accomplished

What you described does not seem to me to be unprofessional at all.  First of all, there is no objective measure of what is "fair" or "unfair". It is a meaningless criteria due to the innate subjectivity of the concept.

If you reinforce behavior that you prefer, that just makes good business sense, besides acting like a normal human being.

Ok, good to know.

The head spins a bit when you get started.  But I've found that lessons learned in how to respect oneself and others in the "real" world transfer well to this world too (no surprise).
If you just be yourself, be friendly and respectful, don't sweat the little things, trust your instincts, and be willing to admit you don't know it all (not hard for me), then things for the most part will work out fine (and if they don't it's not always your fault).
Internalizing the phrase "Move On" has been absolutely critical too.  You just can't take anything personally. Those words are the cryptonite to counter the tendency of newbs to obsess a bit over a lady, or worry why she hasn't responded within X number of hours to an email, or over-analyzing/questioning particular policies, etc.  And of course, this board and the advice of experienced guys like you has been invaluable too.

And frankly, adjusting to this world has been nothing compared to learning how to manage others at work, lol! (especially my "problem" employee!)

You are saying she is, or might be, a "niche marketer" and I get that point. But she isn't "niche marketing" here. She is giving newbs advice. BIG difference.

If she posted that blog post on a regional ad board, I wouldn't have thought twice about it. Some girls market themselves as "upscale", some as "sluts" (their term, not mine lol) some as "GND", some as "S&M", etc etc etc and they have every right to market themselves any way they want.

But an experienced gal, saying on the NB, "dont ever contact a lady last minute" (basically), she isnt JUST speaking for herself at that moment, due to the board she is on, but she is speaking for escorts in general, as newbs need sound advice that is "generally" accepted in p4p, at least at the beginning of their learning curve. They would come away thinking it is never ok to contact a girl last minute, but you and I both know, many girls, regardless of "class", will take same day dates.  

To back that point up you state:

"It will affirm their belief that THEY are ideal clients, and superior to the rest...they already know the things she is telling them (have known for years), and they would NEVER play that way."

Yes that may be true, but many newbs measure their time in the biz in DAYS and WEEKS, not necessarily months or years.

And again, the overall tone came off as her being smug and superior, which is more in line to how a domme would market herself, and thus not be appropriate on the NB, imo.  

Many newbie guys are scared sh*tless at the start for so many reasons, and imo, Tabu made those feelings even more real to some by her snobbish and intimidating post.

Girl, I seriously can't stop laughing at this. Thank you.

This "customer is always right " bullshit is just that...bullshit. A use of an absolute is ludicrous. It then opens the door for the customer to an asshole.  

I prefer to treat a client as I would like to be treated, not above, not below but right their next to me.

END OF MESSAGE