This used to be simpler back in the day. I payed money and I got to have sex with a gorgeous woman...

But for a whole now, there has been a lot of pretend "girlfriend stuff" (I put that in scare quotes because it isn't anything like how my GF's have acted...). And it is a bit of a buzzkill to say the least.  

I am somewhat aware of reality and I know I am not actually their BF and because of my looks and goofiness they would never pick me even if they knew of my 100 Billion Dollar Internet Genius bank account.  

And that is fine.  

But pretending otherwise just harshes my mellow...  

Now, that being said, I do not want the PSE either. Well, not most of the time. That it is easy to ask for...  

Finally (I know sorry), I like hookers and I want a real woman there with a personality and I want to fuck them...  

TL;DR Is it ok to say before the meeting that I would like her to "go easy on the girlfriend stuff"?  

Alternate TL;DR I am old and things have changed and I don't like it. Help.

If you are meeting a gal for the first time she probably has no idea as to what level you want, what you call, "girlfriend stuff".    Most providers, however will most likely have an better idea of your concerns after several visits with you--even if you don't exactly convey those to her.

And to answer your question about asking to "go easy on the girlfriend stuff"?   That is probably too vague for anybody to understand, and you might get a pretty poor or bland experience from even asking that.    

Some providers do over-exaggerate and pretend more than others, but that may just be their nature or their way of "doing business".   Even though we know it's a little over the top, it is still nice to hear, and some of us like it from time to time!   And if that's not your thing, try to convey that to her---and the fewer words you use, the better!

Like I said earlier, if you have seen each other several times--and especially for multi-hour sessions, she and you can be more comfortable to just be "yourselves".    And that level of understanding and trust is wonderful and rare.

but get a BBBJ is to book 30 minute sessions. Many providers offer those, and from what I've seen they don't tend to be those who offer GFE.  But if they do, the amount of girlfriend-like stuff that can happen is limited.  

Or, look for providers whose reviews typically have her giving a BBBJ the minute the guy steps in the door. After that's done, you can say, "Thanks, that was great, but I gotta be somewhere" and leave.

-- Modified on 12/14/2014 12:20:25 PM

"ON/OFF" switch.  Most ladies need a little warm-up chat to get their motor running.  Maybe you are trying to say to minimize the GF stuff.

But it's tricky to how to go about that. Most girls like the GFE stuff because it = more money. Just to give a act of BBBJ, well, you can't really price that out, since it's "her time". You can stick to girls that offer 30 minutes or pay just for the "service" and get what you get, or pony up and pay for the hour with a reputable provider and then let her know, you'd probably continue to see her more frequently if you could just get the BBBJ. If she doesn't get the hint, try someone new until you can get your quick visit or a decent discount. I have guys that want the same thing, and I literally stay in bra and panties for the whole session. After a while, the GFE stuff comes up anyways, they usually get more relaxed and want to stay for the full hour or are more comfortable and want to try more stuff. I think it would work best with someone you can establish a little bit with and then she'd know what you want and cut out the BS.

Friendly, but not in too obviously a fakey way.
Keeping it real, yet not overly mechanical.

Aside from reading reviews to get a sense of the lady, maybe go with a bit more mature ladies??
The real young ones seem the most likely to be as you've described...

Or just try to roll with this and accept it.  Maybe make some good-natured self-depricating jokes to show that you don't have an ego that needs to be stroked.  Seeing you keep it real might help them to relax a bit and not feel like they need to put on quite as much of an act.  Of course, all won't respond to this the same way, as some only know one way to be and aren't interested in being a little more real with a stranger on a P4P date.

I just don't want her to pretend she is my girlfriend.  

I am more comfortable with her being an escort and me being a john than with her pretending to be my girlfriend.  

She's a whole meaningful person and I'm a whole meaningful person.  

Can't we(I?) just have great sex without us pretending this is something it isn't?  

-- Modified on 12/14/2014 4:31:20 PM

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a real woman with a personality (and I'm on board with this 100% myself).
Of course "real" is only good if the lady is friendly and truly service-oriented! (everyone's real side isn't so pretty, lol, - though I'll say the vast majority of ladies I've been with have been genuinely nice - which is why I keep doing this).

I'd try to mine the reviews very carefully and PM other guys if the false flattery is bothering you enough that it affects the quality of the date for you.

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...to me, that's not what "GFE" is about.  

I do, however, provide my clients with an experience that would be akin to something i'd enjoy with personal lovers.  

For me, there's no illusion about a relationship; there's no illusion about why we are there. But just because we are both fully aware of why we are there doesn't mean that we can't enjoy some level of intimacy.  

GFE, to me, means the experience is simply more involved, and that involvement is more genuine.  I only enjoy being used as a hole by certain people; those people aren't clients.  For me, GFE means our mouths can go where they like. I love kissing and am orally fixated; it's a major turn-on.  Not having that isn't a complete deal-breaker, but I definitely enjoy the experience more when it's involved.  

I think you have to identify what you dislike about GFE, and then ask that those things not be included.  Are there actual acts you don't want to participate in, like kissing? Or is it the overall feel that you're being fed some fake fantasy? Once you can differentiate, that would be helpful for everyone involved, methinks.

good luck to you! :

Because we both know she's NOT and never will be my girlfriend. Maybe I've never had a provider pretend to be my girlfriend because I favor mature ladies as providers--and I mean mature as in how they think and act, not necessarily in how old they are.

Perhaps the problem here is in how you're interpreting the behavior of escorts. If they're nice to you, focused on your pleasure, and seem to be having a great time themselves, it may not be an act at all. They might genuinely enjoy showing their clients a good time, and have a good time doing it. It doesn't mean they're your girlfriend. My ATF excels at treating each of her clients as a "meaningful person" and loves it when her clients treat her likewise. But she makes it clear she's the girlfriend of only one man--and he's not a client of hers. She's told me there's some clients who don't understand that; they think she's their girlfriend just because she treats them in a kind, caring way during their sessions.

And if they are acting a bit--and who doesn't have to put on an act sometimes in the world of Customer Service; I know I do--so what?  As long as it's not over the top, just roll with it, focus on having a good time. Then you can decide if you'll see her again.

delivery. You should be able to get a sense of her style and personality. When you meet a lady, most welcome some hints about what you would like. It saves us from trying to 'figure it out

...None of them have pretended to be my girlfriend. We talked, played, left. We were more like fuck buddies, friendly and welcoming.