Maybe I am missing something, but if you are looking for a very specific encounter, or wardrobe, or have requests beyond the scope of most reviews how do you go about discussing it with or requesting it without breaking any laws/rules during conversations?  

Things like specific wardrobe, toys, role play, or how you want the encounter to happen?

On a similar note, if looking for a couples date, and one half of the couple is nervous and wants some specifics prior, doesn't that violate the whole no talking about sex thing?

And would love to hear some answers!

First, I wonder if this post should be moved to Newbie because it is very general and not just for NY. You should search Newbie using the Search tab, also.

Wardrobe is usually okay to ask about when it comes to matters of standard attire: shorts and a tank top versus cocktail dress. Many can tread towards lingerie ("that red outfit on your website pic") but I never go there. I suggest you avoid asking for her to arrive with matching dildos protruding from holes or other such requests.

"Other stuff" that sounds way too sexual is considered verboten so you can't ask "Will you suck my dick without a condom?" without the possibility of getting ignored and blocked. Some people even thing that asking specifically about whether she has or uses female condoms (FC) is too suggestive for pre-meeting discussion.  

Sometimes (rarely), I have been able to refer to specific reviews to convey my wants and desires, along the lines of "Bob and Ray sounded like they were really happy meeting you.  Bernie and Phil mentioned some exciting things but I'm really not interested in that stuff. Huey, Dewey and Louie quacked me up, but they seemed to be missing out on some of the Bob and Ray fun." If you're lucky, you might hear back that she can make you as happy as Bob and Ray and whatever that implies. (Maybe: Bob and Ray mention BBBJNQNS; Bernie and Phil mention anal; H, D and L mention CBJ, CIM denied.)

You can read Juicy Details and PM reviewers to ask for some advice or details but you need VIP.

I'm sure that more advice will follow.

-- Modified on 8/17/2016 1:31:56 PM

Good way to promote your business.Have clients contact you with the answers.Which will lead to paid sessions.Thanks for ideal.Go girl work it       Have a TLC day!!!!!!!!!

-- Modified on 8/17/2016 2:29:16 PM

the best a guy can do is read complete reviews & see if she generally offers what you are looking for.  But there's still a element of unknown.  Once you are both naked & behind closed doors, you can explore options.  Still not a guarentee.
If you get too specific...  the gal will likely freak since answering is almost certainly an admission of prostitution.  
In reality, there's no need to discuss...  you both know why you are there.

if you can get specific with a request and then wait for a green light from her before you proceed.
Just be tastefully explicit with the way you word it.

Almost without exception this has worked for me.  When you do though, remember NEVER to mention rates at the same time...I did that once as a newbie (What was I thinking???) and have regretted it ever since...you may never get a second chance.  

-- Modified on 8/18/2016 8:27:15 AM

I've never asked for anything on the first meeting. Once I meet someone and we both hit it off and want to see each other again, I have asked for certain things that I find sexy for example - this worked perfectly..."i'd love to see you twerk for me and slowly undress for me while I am sitting and enjoying the view". The date it took it to a whole new level that I thought was fantastic.  

You can mention that you liked a particular outfit on her ad/site, and hope she will show up in something similar.

You could also mention something *very* discrete, like "bring your favorite massager."  That should be discrete enough to not get either of you in trouble in the worst case scenario.

Beyond that, any discussion of price (or any references to a price, like her ad or website) along with a specific act (including acronyms, euphemisms, etc) is a gigantic red flag.  Best to discuss such things until you've met in person, and are naked, and even better once condoms have served their purpose.

Honestly, if you're looking for something within the realm of kink/fetish/role play, providers that do those things are oftentimes very specific about it on their websites. Personally, I'll discuss sessions, fetishes, how dates should go, etc if the person is polite and asks me before hand. It makes it easier for the both of us, really.  

If a gal is doing a good job of marketing herself, she might have a description of her play style somewhere on her website, or you should be able to ascertain her style of play and "how a session might go" before you even reach out to her.  After all, you're reaching out to her for reason, yes?

But like some others have said, asking her politely about discussing specifics is the only way you'll ever really know.  

Good luck!